I just finished masturbating again, after watching several clips of the devils video. Oh no, I feel dead. I had assured myself that I would practice self love, but yet again, I have betrayed me, right in the dead end. Why do I still do shit that I don't want to do? Why can't I just easily stop? I have decided to stop. I taught decisions are powerful? Why can't I stop PM? Looking closely, I have decided to stop, but it seems that something betrays me at the death end. This is called pressure. Values are tested in pressures. As some Fapstronaut said, "Commitment and values are not measured when your head is clear. They are measured in the heat of that anxious moment of discomfort." Some call it pressure, I call it 'zombie land' - a place in a person's mind, where by all personal commitments and values are lost in a second for the sniper oriented instant gratification. If you are really in NoFap, then you want to really stop this shitty thing. You want to end this mess. You are a way ahead, but not far ahead. The real war lies in the pressurized mind, and not in clear headed decisions. Yet again, I have resetted, but not resettled. How then can I just settle without this addiction? Willpower? Decision? Discipline? Time management? Maybe, but this things are easily forgotten in Zombie Land. In Zombie Land, the senses are forgotten, Goals, Visions, Plans, Commitments and Values are blurred. All that matters at the time is to watch some devils video, and fab. How do we as a family of anonymous brothers with the same goal in mind, put our values over our lives? Brothers yet unseen, friends yet unknown, people with common goals, soldiers of the same battalion, how can we learn the fine art of escaping Zombie Land? Self Awareness. Self awareness is thinking about our thought process. Thinking about our thinking. You talking with thee. In Zombie Land, All that matters is feelings. To live a life of feelings is a dangerous game. Who doesn't feel like watching the devils videos? Okay, at least porn addicts. To banish ourselves from our feelings, we must learn to control our thoughts process, only when we think about our thinking, can we realign our selves with what Stephen Covey Calls paradigms, based on correct principles. This battle is not for the fist but for the mind. To escape Zombie Land, we must think about our values and commitments, we must rethink in pressures. We cannot say we are this, if we haven't been tested to be that. Zombie Land...a place where our values are lost, to escape, we must not control the pain, but control the sufferings. Let us be tempted and think otherwise, by thinking through the thoughts by deep careful analysis of our taughts Keep strength, Love Thyself, Try again. One more day, no more porn. A day at a time, no more excuses.