MIDAS.Technique
New Fapstronaut
Hi all.
I have failed for many years at overcoming my PMO problem (my longest streak ever in my life was around 23 days). I say 'problem' and not addiction as PMO has not overtaken my life (yet anyway). I am still able to function normally and get on with my life. However my constant problem with PMO has caused me a lot of depression, anxiety and loss of self-worth, as well as causing me to fail in my work, relationships, and life in general. Moreover, I struggle to have any motivations or aspirations to better my life or take steps to recovery after PMO sessions. All of these negative consequences and side effects of PMO are really killing me deep inside
I started doing some research on techniques that I can apply in my daily life to overcome my PMO problem. There are a lot of research done on techniques for overcoming problems such as PMO but I wanted one that is easy to understand and implement in my life.
Just recently I came across an advice on a NoFap Reddit thread about using the MIDAS technique for overcoming PMO. The person who posted the advice in the thread mentioned that the advice was given by his therapist.
This has got to be one of the best pieces of advice I have ever read on techniques for overcoming PMO.
Starting from today (May 30 2020), I have decided to conduct an experiment on myself: rebooting from PMO for 90 days by simply applying the MIDAS technique combined with religion (not specifying a particular religion). I decided to combine it with religion as I think both complement each other well, and in my opinion incorporating religion also adds a moral compass to the MIDAS technique.
I will share my experiences and observations on my self-experimentation progress every week on this thread.
Feel free to share your thoughts and opinions on the matter, or share your experiences too if you have done something similar.
Basically according to the advice on NoFap Reddit thread, the MIDAS technique is as follows (I've added a few additional points myself):
M - Mindfulness:
Be aware of your body and mental state.
Recognise when you feel urges and see them for what they are: a maladaptive strategy you have learnt to use to deal with negative feelings and emotions, as well as a bad habit you regularly use to temporarily overcome stress and anxiety in your life.
I - Instant distraction:
Do something! Urges do not go away if you try and sit through them.
For example, do the dishes, clean your room, put on some music and dance like a lunatic. Do something, anything other than PMO, to distract yourself from the urge.
D - Distortion of the mind:
This is when your mind is justifying the action to yourself and when it becomes a deep urge to give in to the temptation.
"One peak won't hurt"
"I haven't PMO for a long while, I deserve this"
"Nobody will know"
"I haven't got a long streak yet so I can reset again tomorrow"
"I can reset again on the 1st of a new month for a fresh start"
Being aware of cognitive distortion at all times when they are happening and knowing that your mind is just playing tricks with you can help overcome this.
A - Adverse consequences:
Self-explanatory - what are the negative affects of giving in to PMO?
Feelings of guilt / shame.
Breakdown of intimacy / relationship.
Financial trouble.
One thing you can do is write or reflect on short and long term benefits and costs of PMO. By doing this you will clearly see that there are really no long-term benefits to PMO so can make a rational decision not to engage in that behaviour.
S - Self-worth:
This one is often overlooked. Be proud of overcoming an urge or resisting a behaviour.
Ask yourself, will giving in to PMO now make you that better person that you aspire to be?
Will giving in to PMO actually do something noble for you in your life or will it just thrown you down a never-ending abyss?
Will engaging in PMO grant you fulfillment in your life and make you appreciate the beauty of living?
You only have a finite life on this Earth, do you really want to waste it away on PMO?
I hope this helps those out other there struggling with PMO like myself. Wish me luck and hopefully in 90 days time I can report some good results
I have failed for many years at overcoming my PMO problem (my longest streak ever in my life was around 23 days). I say 'problem' and not addiction as PMO has not overtaken my life (yet anyway). I am still able to function normally and get on with my life. However my constant problem with PMO has caused me a lot of depression, anxiety and loss of self-worth, as well as causing me to fail in my work, relationships, and life in general. Moreover, I struggle to have any motivations or aspirations to better my life or take steps to recovery after PMO sessions. All of these negative consequences and side effects of PMO are really killing me deep inside
I started doing some research on techniques that I can apply in my daily life to overcome my PMO problem. There are a lot of research done on techniques for overcoming problems such as PMO but I wanted one that is easy to understand and implement in my life.
Just recently I came across an advice on a NoFap Reddit thread about using the MIDAS technique for overcoming PMO. The person who posted the advice in the thread mentioned that the advice was given by his therapist.
This has got to be one of the best pieces of advice I have ever read on techniques for overcoming PMO.
Starting from today (May 30 2020), I have decided to conduct an experiment on myself: rebooting from PMO for 90 days by simply applying the MIDAS technique combined with religion (not specifying a particular religion). I decided to combine it with religion as I think both complement each other well, and in my opinion incorporating religion also adds a moral compass to the MIDAS technique.
I will share my experiences and observations on my self-experimentation progress every week on this thread.
Feel free to share your thoughts and opinions on the matter, or share your experiences too if you have done something similar.
Basically according to the advice on NoFap Reddit thread, the MIDAS technique is as follows (I've added a few additional points myself):
M - Mindfulness:
Be aware of your body and mental state.
Recognise when you feel urges and see them for what they are: a maladaptive strategy you have learnt to use to deal with negative feelings and emotions, as well as a bad habit you regularly use to temporarily overcome stress and anxiety in your life.
I - Instant distraction:
Do something! Urges do not go away if you try and sit through them.
For example, do the dishes, clean your room, put on some music and dance like a lunatic. Do something, anything other than PMO, to distract yourself from the urge.
D - Distortion of the mind:
This is when your mind is justifying the action to yourself and when it becomes a deep urge to give in to the temptation.
"One peak won't hurt"
"I haven't PMO for a long while, I deserve this"
"Nobody will know"
"I haven't got a long streak yet so I can reset again tomorrow"
"I can reset again on the 1st of a new month for a fresh start"
Being aware of cognitive distortion at all times when they are happening and knowing that your mind is just playing tricks with you can help overcome this.
A - Adverse consequences:
Self-explanatory - what are the negative affects of giving in to PMO?
Feelings of guilt / shame.
Breakdown of intimacy / relationship.
Financial trouble.
One thing you can do is write or reflect on short and long term benefits and costs of PMO. By doing this you will clearly see that there are really no long-term benefits to PMO so can make a rational decision not to engage in that behaviour.
S - Self-worth:
This one is often overlooked. Be proud of overcoming an urge or resisting a behaviour.
Ask yourself, will giving in to PMO now make you that better person that you aspire to be?
Will giving in to PMO actually do something noble for you in your life or will it just thrown you down a never-ending abyss?
Will engaging in PMO grant you fulfillment in your life and make you appreciate the beauty of living?
You only have a finite life on this Earth, do you really want to waste it away on PMO?
I hope this helps those out other there struggling with PMO like myself. Wish me luck and hopefully in 90 days time I can report some good results
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