Severe urge and no support from SO should i go to a escort

After I found out I have total PIED I thought that my life is totally fucked beyong repair followed by depression that there is no way, no light at the end of tunnel.
However after flatline DAY 44 I felt erections again and decided also to test it with a prostitute (pretty cheap in UK 40 pound for 40 minutes).

When visiting prostitute I actually didnt care about orgasm at all, the only thing I wanted to find out if I am able to fuck a women and if my life will have value again or not.
I fucked that prostitute 2 times in that 40 minutes and I ended up having strongest erection that I remembered in years. I left really happy not because of orgasm but because I saw that I am not totally fucked up, everything was suddenly brighter and depression was gone. BTW afterwards I still continued in my streak till DAY 75.

IMHO it really depends on your goals: if you just seek quick release and orgasm don't do it. But if you think it will make you psychologically better I would advice go for it. Just be prepared for chaser afterwards.
 
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Davidphd1866 said:
Future Doctore made a HUGE statement. Brilliant.

I feel the same way. I used to go to a "massage therapist" who would give me a handjob after each massage. She acted like she loved me. (I knew better) One day I showed up and got my massage and customary handjob......reached into my wallet to pay her....and...OOOPS! I only have a few dollars in there. I apologized to her profusely and promised to immediately return with plenty. (I had always tipped her generously) By this time I saw her at least a dozen times.

She grew super angry, kicked me out of the place and told me never to come back.

THAT is what an escort really thinks of you.
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I was trapped in the same sort of game. I went to see a message escort late January this year. I select a masseur and the rest you know that customary stuff they make until you cum. Let me tell that the moment I step myself out of the parlour, a terrible feeling of guilt just overwhelmed me. Couldn't even sleep at night thinking what actually occurred in the parlour and where was my conscience. It's true like what people have been saying. It's just the spur of the moment.

After two months of not going to any massage parlour, now I am still fighting the urge not to mess up again. In addition, I am working on no PMO on my eighth day.

Last night, I was inclined to masturbate while listening to some erotic audios. But I hold off before cumming thinking how silly this whole process is and instead took a shower and meditate. I slept after that.

The battle is still on.
 
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Feelings of guilt? Utter nonsense. We are sexual beings.

Men always end up paying for sex in the long run anyway whether its relationships, marriage or sex workers.
 
For the OP, if you look down at escorts, if you feel negative about them, if you will feel negative emotions after the experience then don't go.

If you can be positive or at least casual, can treat them with respect, and enjoy their service, then there is no harm for your recovery

If you and your SO have agreed values on monogamy etc then it is sooner our or l collateral damage to the relationship. Even if you hide it from her it is still very bad to the relationship.
 
Champ OK said:
I was trapped in the same sort of game. I went to see a message escort late January this year. I select a masseur and the rest you know that customary stuff they make until you cum. Let me tell that the moment I step myself out of the parlour, a terrible feeling of guilt just overwhelmed me. Couldn't even sleep at night thinking what actually occurred in the parlour and where was my conscience. It's true like what people have been saying. It's just the spur of the moment.

After two months of not going to any massage parlour, now I am still fighting the urge not to mess up again. In addition, I am working on no PMO on my eighth day.

Last night, I was inclined to masturbate while listening to some erotic audios. But I hold off before cumming thinking how silly this whole process is and instead took a shower and meditate. I slept after that.

The battle is still on.
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Well done Champ. Massage parlours are just ONE of the many risky behaviors I have either curbed or are curbing in my battle. In a way, that pissed off massage "therapist" helped make resisting the MANY massage places in Los Angeles easy to skip.
 
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