Sex and Nofap reebooting

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by PenisIllustrator123, Mar 8, 2019.

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  1. PenisIllustrator123

    PenisIllustrator123 Fapstronaut

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    Guys...so..I'm in day 10 of the reboot..almost had sex yesterday with a friend of mine but stopped ( almost came with just 10 seconds of a bj ). I can clearly see my head trying to fantasize all the time..it's annoying. What do you guys really think about sex during reebot? Have anyone had positive experiences with it? If I have an O during sex, will I be back to square one?
     
    freeit likes this.
  2. heightening

    heightening Fapstronaut

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    It depends, healthy intimacy with a partner can help a lot but from personal experience it could also be a substitute for PMO. When I have urges without the presence of a partner than PMO takes over, but through natural playfulness and foreplay comes a form of intimacy that isn't plagued by PMO.

    Sexual thoughts can effect the level of intimacy. In terms of O I find the best way to overcome relapse is to make sure you do it in moderation, of course it also depends on the level of the addiction, for an addict who's consumed it for a large portion of their life (myself) I would abstain from it completely. Until when? Sadly I'm unsure right now.

    I know that sex during my reboot consumes a large part of my mental energy and especially if I'm not in a LTR(long term relationship) I'll end up chasing girls for the wrong reasons. So personally I choose to stay celibate so that I can put my mind on my other needs (wealth, career, family, friends).
     
  3. freeit

    freeit Fapstronaut

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    Yeah. If you're using your S as an alternative to your PMO, it's going to be healthy.
    You should stay in control even if she's not with you.
    You should be focused on having S only with her.
    You're ok to receive handjob, blowjob or sex from her.
    Just stay alert when you're alone.
     
    PenisIllustrator123 likes this.
  4. Qujing Shen

    Qujing Shen Fapstronaut

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    I had sex with a girl on the weekend. I didn't watch pornography, masturbate or release my seminal fluid, so I was happy with the experience. I wouldn't take it back.

    Ultimately, it just depends on your values and what you're really trying to achieve. My goal is to preserve my seminal fluid so that my sexual energy may be utilised in the pursuit of more constructive ends.

    What's your aim with all this?

    Be clear on that and prioritise accordingly.
     
  5. PenisIllustrator123

    PenisIllustrator123 Fapstronaut

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    Nice! I see. My goal is similar to yours..I want to reboot my mind, send my PIED to outer space, and start getting aroused from sex..( and preserve my sexual energy ).I don't really know which would be best..hard mode or like having SO. I don't want to stop seeing my girl but I'm really commited to this reboot so it's a tricky situation, especially bc she is reaaaaally sexual. I guess I'll stick with what I'm doing, I'm seeing some nice results so why not
     
  6. Qujing Shen

    Qujing Shen Fapstronaut

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    What does PIED mean? I keep seeing it everywhere but I don't know what it is.

    I imagine it's extremely challenging to be active with a sexual partner and never release, but I've got a book called Taoist Sexual Meditation by Bruce Frantzis which teaches you how to safely have internal orgasms (among other things), so I need to get studying!
     
    PenisIllustrator123 likes this.
  7. heightening

    heightening Fapstronaut

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    From my experience, (I'm no relationship expert!) open and honest communication about your sexual goals with your partner can be very helpful. What I learned from my experience is It's very possible to stimulate my mind into an orgasm however I had moments of board-line sex addiction and would continue to have sex even after ejaculation. So my challenge became controlling my behavior after Orgasm or ejaculation. This is where open communication helped me out a lot. Setting clear HEALTHY boundaries ended up working for the two of us and made higher levels of intimacy.

    Also saved a crazy amount of energy, I hated how I felt after 3-4 orgasms/ejaculation. I became so uninterested with life and wanted to sleep all day.
     
    PenisIllustrator123 likes this.
  8. PenisIllustrator123

    PenisIllustrator123 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for the tip!

    Edit : PIED -> Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction
     
  9. PenisIllustrator123

    PenisIllustrator123 Fapstronaut

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    I see...it is indeed helpful to have clear/open communication, if I hadn't talked about my situation w/ my partner dunno where I would be rn regarding my S life. I'll try deepening it and be more clear as to what my goals are..I think i need to clarify that with my own self first.
     

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