Sexting addiction can anyone relate?

D12323

Fapstronaut
Hello, I got out of a long term relationship about a year ago and started using reddit to ask for nudes and became addicted. It was just a copy and past question, I would spam for hours. Most of the times I wouldnt get answers or no but sometimes I would get someone to sext with. I never sent unsolicited pics or pics with my face. I wasted so much time on this stupid behavior. I eventually got banned from reddit for spamming and then would just make a new account and continue to spam, eventually I got permanently banned which turned out to be a good thing. The total time of my time on reddit was about 4-5 months. After reddit I moved on to dating apps, I was only on them for about 2 months but ended up being “sextorted” I didnt pay but in that moment it felt so real and I felt my soul break. Its been about a month and a half since that incident and immediately once that happened I deleted all of my dating app profiles and social media. Its been about 4 months since I asked for nudes on reddit. I still have anxiety about sexting and my behavior. In all of this i realized i have an addiciton to pornography and have been clean of PMO for 17 days. Ive made a decision to cut that out of my life for good, this is my first time with NoFap and my conviction is very strong. I was just wondering if anyone had similar experiences with reddit and dating apps. Im currently experiencing withdrawal and my emotions are all over the place. I used pmo for close to 10 years. Also wondering how common it is to sext on reddit because on the anonymity
 
Dude thanks so much for the response, i feel so alone. I knew people did it on reddit i just dont know how common it was. I feel bad that i was permanently banned, it worked out because it forced me off that site and stop that behavior. You did it for years?
 
I feel this. I often can’t get off these days without the feeling that I am creating the porn myself. I am addicted to finding girls online and (consensually) sexting them. The problem is, I have a girlfriend. And she is THE one for me. I love her so much. Yet I can’t stop sexting strangers. The concept of being desired, of someone getting naked just for me to get off to them turns me on so much. And it’s terrible because I feel like it’s impacting my view of women as a whole and has destroyed my morality. In my head I try to justify it and say it’s not cheating because I don’t even view these encounters as real encounters, it’s just like interactive porn to me. But I think that’s a horrible way to view it that not only objectifies women but also is really a flimsy excuse for hurting someone I love. I need to stop this behavior and I feel like there was no one else who got it until finding this forum.
 
I feel this. I often can’t get off these days without the feeling that I am creating the porn myself. I am addicted to finding girls online and (consensually) sexting them. The problem is, I have a girlfriend. And she is THE one for me. I love her so much. Yet I can’t stop sexting strangers. The concept of being desired, of someone getting naked just for me to get off to them turns me on so much. And it’s terrible because I feel like it’s impacting my view of women as a whole and has destroyed my morality. In my head I try to justify it and say it’s not cheating because I don’t even view these encounters as real encounters, it’s just like interactive porn to me. But I think that’s a horrible way to view it that not only objectifies women but also is really a flimsy excuse for hurting someone I love. I need to stop this behavior and I feel like there was no one else who got it until finding this forum.

Dude i was going through something similar, it started out while I was in a relationship, we ended it, she never knew. I am working through therapy and its been about 20 days on PMO and let me tell you the guilt and shame I am experiencing are like nothing else. I let this stupid compulsion affect someone I love very much. My advice to you is to delete everything and face all the emotions youve been surpressing. It is extremely hard but you cant keep doing what youre doing. Do you ever got anxiety about who you were really sexting with? Im experiencing this now and again without the dopamine from engaging in it, im severely depressed, anxious, and have just an overall sense of dread. Can you relate?
 
Dude i was going through something similar, it started out while I was in a relationship, we ended it, she never knew. I am working through therapy and its been about 20 days on PMO and let me tell you the guilt and shame I am experiencing are like nothing else. I let this stupid compulsion affect someone I love very much. My advice to you is to delete everything and face all the emotions youve been surpressing. It is extremely hard but you cant keep doing what youre doing. Do you ever got anxiety about who you were really sexting with? Im experiencing this now and again without the dopamine from engaging in it, im severely depressed, anxious, and have just an overall sense of dread. Can you relate?

I can relate so hard. Often in the light of day when the post nut clarity hits, I wonder how I could so easily let a compulsion like this control me. I was in bed with her a few weeks ago and unable to sleep because I was wracked with guilt over the idea that everything with her is perfect and truly the only thing that could fuck it up is my own behavior. I was watching the woman I love sleep next to me and I felt like throwing up because I couldn’t imagine that I was telling other people how sexy I found them or how beautiful they were as I was jerking off. There is truly no one else for me, so the thought that I could disregard her for a quick nut with a stranger feels so awful. I think that night is when I realized I have a problem that’s more than just a casual masturbation habit. It’s a disease I need to shake before it brings my whole life down.
 
I can relate so hard. Often in the light of day when the post nut clarity hits, I wonder how I could so easily let a compulsion like this control me. I was in bed with her a few weeks ago and unable to sleep because I was wracked with guilt over the idea that everything with her is perfect and truly the only thing that could fuck it up is my own behavior. I was watching the woman I love sleep next to me and I felt like throwing up because I couldn’t imagine that I was telling other people how sexy I found them or how beautiful they were as I was jerking off. There is truly no one else for me, so the thought that I could disregard her for a quick nut with a stranger feels so awful. I think that night is when I realized I have a problem that’s more than just a casual masturbation habit. It’s a disease I need to shake before it brings my whole life down.


Man this is crazy the parallels between your story and mine are wild. I felt the exact same way, the deep, soul crushing feeling of guilt and shame for hurting someone you care so deeply about. For me it turned into despair and resentment for myself which I ended up taking out on her, listen to me man you gotta stop. Consider talking to a therapists if you can, the guilt and shame that comes to the surface after stopping PMO and numbing yourself from these feelings are like nothing ive ever experienced.
 
Man this is crazy the parallels between your story and mine are wild. I felt the exact same way, the deep, soul crushing feeling of guilt and shame for hurting someone you care so deeply about. For me it turned into despair and resentment for myself which I ended up taking out on her, listen to me man you gotta stop. Consider talking to a therapists if you can, the guilt and shame that comes to the surface after stopping PMO and numbing yourself from these feelings are like nothing ive ever experienced.

I’m not in a super great situation to afford therapy right now, but depending on how bad it gets over the next few months of abstaining from PMO I may have to look into it. I’m scared man. I just want to feel like I’m living again.
 
I’m not in a super great situation to afford therapy right now, but depending on how bad it gets over the next few months of abstaining from PMO I may have to look into it. I’m scared man. I just want to feel like I’m living again.


I gotchya man, yea I know exactly how you feel. I would delete everything, even social media if youre on it, and find some deep conviction in yourself and go for it. Try and pick up new hobbies or try to be more present with your girlfriend. Feel free to message me if you ever have questions or just some support or need to vent.
 
I gotchya man, yea I know exactly how you feel. I would delete everything, even social media if youre on it, and find some deep conviction in yourself and go for it. Try and pick up new hobbies or try to be more present with your girlfriend. Feel free to message me if you ever have questions or just some support or need to vent.
The same here, man. Someone’s gotta hold us accountable.
 
I had similar. I had several phone numbers of chicks that I swapped numbers with on dating sites but for one reason or another we never met up. There was about 10 or so and I sent them all a pictures of me with my cock out. Then apologized saying whoops sorry wrong number it was supposed to go to my girlfriend. Crazy. Most of them laughed it off an believed me, one or two told me to fuck off. Had a few say mmm nice and encourage more. I came to my senses and realized I needed a real girlfriend. I have that now but I still suffer with desires to flash and other addictive fetishes
 
The book Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction By Patrick J Carnes touches on this type of addiction.

The book is a bit old, and it has a focus on voyeurism is somewhat analogous to this. There are men who would stake out of hours just to see a few seconds of a woman undressing.

I don't have any experiences to share regarding the specific problem you mentioned, but I can recommend the book for a good discussion on sexual addictions in general, as well as for an assurance that you're not alone.
 
Yes, sexting on reddit here. There are some various subreddits only made for sexting which I won't mention here obviously, but I had little to no results.

It helps to realize that sexting is just words and nothing else.

Example: You are dumb. You can assign a value to these words and feel offended, or you can just see those words as literally words, a specific combination of letters.

The same goes for sexting. The words itself have no sexual value, these are only words, a combination of certain letters.

And everything which is sent (like nudes) also isn't special, if you start to look at these things from a biological or even medical point of view. A vagina is nothing special if you're a gynecologist. A penis is nothing special if you're a urologist.

It's you who assigns a sexual value to words and pictures. They themselves have nothing sexual itself, they are in fact neutral and "boring".
 
I relate to this so much.

its really ruined my life in moments and I cant help it. I used to spend hours in the free only fans loop, where I would have 250+ accounts on their and even buy some things sometimes. I would message them all the time and got a thrill out of it. I have been with my girlfriend for a few years and love her so much we’re definitely going to get married as we’re inseparable.
Im not sure why but I spent so long messaging girls and never understood why.
I feel so guilty and my girlfriend is genuinely gorgeous, everything about her is what I want in a girl shes got a pretty face, slim waist long legs small boobs and a nice ass only 5’4 and better looking than most of the girls I messaged. Im 20 and shes 18 were 15 months apart.
I have deleted onlyfans and reddit accounts before but have got new ones again.
I also do not feel great at the minute and I masturbate sort of impulsivly chasing that feeling and then immediately afterwards feeling so guilty and confused.
It has lead to me having riskier wanks such as at work and ive started doing things that I have no interest in doing but seem to do them just because. its got to a point now and I just csnt deal with it anymore. I had a successful NoFap in January and felt soooo good about it but I relapsed after 8 days. Which is the w break in years. During that time I found myself obsessing over sexual acts less and it really helped my relationship and even my performance in the gym.
I dont know what I can do
I guess I have made this to see if anyone else has felt similar
 
Dear everyone in this thread,
I can totally relate to your issue. I have a GF and yet I used an app in which it was VERY easy to videocall and sext with other girls. I'm not going to name the app here (its not relevant) and please do not start chase out those type of apps. I feel like shit after this episode, yet it woke me up to the fact that NEVER AGAIN will I do the same or watch pornography or do videocall sexting. HOWEVER, that being said, it is virtual and NOT REAL. So the guilt we feel will only make us relapse once again (that is my belief, anyway). So go easy on yourself. We've been brainwashed into this culture, but we have the opportunity to get out of it.

PLEASE everyone take a look at this video: Quit Pornography Addiction Forever with Hypnosis, NLP and Alpha Wave Binaural Beats - YouTube

And this: Free Yoga Nidra Course | Tripura Yoga

It really seems to help.
Bless you! We can beat this!!!
 
Yes I can relate brother.
Evryday I have to face the urges to contact dommes on a meeting website.
Sometimes i manage to control the urges sometimes not like today.
I get thrills of pleasure when i talk to these dommes,not every time but sometimes.
When the discussion get a little bit hotter i like that.
Bro i feel so lonely and acting like a pervert makes me want to puke but loneliness is hard
 
I relate to this so much.

its really ruined my life in moments and I cant help it. I used to spend hours in the free only fans loop, where I would have 250+ accounts on their and even buy some things sometimes. I would message them all the time and got a thrill out of it. I have been with my girlfriend for a few years and love her so much we’re definitely going to get married as we’re inseparable.
Im not sure why but I spent so long messaging girls and never understood why.
I feel so guilty and my girlfriend is genuinely gorgeous, everything about her is what I want in a girl shes got a pretty face, slim waist long legs small boobs and a nice ass only 5’4 and better looking than most of the girls I messaged. Im 20 and shes 18 were 15 months apart.
I have deleted onlyfans and reddit accounts before but have got new ones again.
I also do not feel great at the minute and I masturbate sort of impulsivly chasing that feeling and then immediately afterwards feeling so guilty and confused.
It has lead to me having riskier wanks such as at work and ive started doing things that I have no interest in doing but seem to do them just because. its got to a point now and I just csnt deal with it anymore. I had a successful NoFap in January and felt soooo good about it but I relapsed after 8 days. Which is the w break in years. During that time I found myself obsessing over sexual acts less and it really helped my relationship and even my performance in the gym.
I dont know what I can do
I guess I have made this to see if anyone else has felt similar

It's going to come a time when the governments around the world realize that all social media apps (and I mean ALL), was just the new form of cigarette. But this time given to 90 % of the population (lol). We're just unlucky man. Don't go too hard on yourself. The urges pass with time as long as we keep improving every day :)
 
I’m not in a super great situation to afford therapy right now, but depending on how bad it gets over the next few months of abstaining from PMO I may have to look into it. I’m scared man. I just want to feel like I’m living again.

Is there any free therapy options where you live? Sometimes clinics will have resources that are free or cheaper for those who want help but may not have the means.

That aside, the first step to anything is realizing it and analyzing why we do what we do. You're on the right path, you can make the right decisions and do good by the woman you love! :)

Keep your eye on the prize, brother.
 
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