Sexual Anxiety

Discussion in 'Rebooting in a Relationship' started by KevR24, Jun 24, 2020.

  1. KevR24

    KevR24 Fapstronaut

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    I am losing the battle before I even start. At some moments I’m so ready for sex and others I feel like I’m doomed to fail (and at those times I literally always do). I know all of this is mental. I’m so fucking embarrassed and emasculated by this and the shit I think to myself is so awful. I’m 11 days clean and overall I’ve been a lot more sober in 2020. I feel like a disappointment and not a man, and I don’t even know how my wife could find me attractive at this point. I hate myself right now.
     
  2. Dont be so down man, i know how ya feel. Except i lost sight of everything in 2020 with the whole shutdown thing, just wasted away time that coulda been used to improve/change my life.

    Have you tried talking to your SO about it? If not, i know it feels shameful or embarrassing but maybe that could help.
    I opened up to my gf and altho difficult at first, she has been supportive and caring (even with her laundry list of stress goin on).
     
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  3. KevR24

    KevR24 Fapstronaut

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    My SO has been great through all of this. She’s getting frustrated bc I get inside my own head to a point where there is no walking off the ledge, but I can’t blame her.

    I think the silver lining to this is I’ve never loved someone to the point to want to fight this like I am now. I’m only 13 days in a row in, but by and large I’ve never been in a period where I slip up less. I just really beat myself up with each set back.
     
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  4. Right on man! I too, feel i have the same silver lining. And i too really beat myself up... i think thats why alot of us on here turn to pmo and other addictions, that sense of hopelessness can slip in easily when we beat ourselves up.
    Just keep positive bro
     
  5. jn75

    jn75 Fapstronaut

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    I’m right there with you as well. We can do it. It is important right now as there are definitely things that we are being called for at this point in history that require purity and a clean mind in order to lead those that may have questions about what is about to occur in the US and worldwide. A great awakening. That’s all I can chalk this up to and couldn’t have been a better time to be free.God rescued me just in time. He knows what he is doing. Trust it. You are a leader. Better believe that and live it brother.
     
  6. jn75

    jn75 Fapstronaut

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    Trust me on this we need all the warriors we can get right now and you are one.
     
  7. adamuser33

    adamuser33 New Fapstronaut

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    It's really all because of your mental state. You need to relax a little bit and to let all the things go by themselves. May be some natural ways would help you and you have to try all the methods to solve the problem. I can advise you to try a sexual stimulant like it is Kratom, because I know it has very many benefits that people don't know very well. I've heard one time about it and I found more information on kratomyard, where there are described all its effects and uses. It's a really good thing that I hope will be useful for you in this difficult situation.
     
    Last edited: Jun 30, 2020
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  8. KevR24

    KevR24 Fapstronaut

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    I myself haven’t tried anything, but I am open to stuff that is natural. Do you have any suggestions?
     
  9. KevR24

    KevR24 Fapstronaut

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    Sometimes I just feel shame for who I am. It’s like PMO are this bandaid that covers up all the things about myself I regret that I’ve done or that I struggle with. I’ve taken that away for 16 days and right now all this shame is floating to the top of my mind. It makes me dislike myself so much.
     
  10. Know what ya meen, try using it as positive reinforcement for the future. if your past doesnt go anywhere, just try to move away from IT in a better direction.
     
  11. KevR24

    KevR24 Fapstronaut

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    I’m not trying to make this a daily thread or journal per se, but I did want to post to give myself a little strength.

    These are such difficult times. I’m blessed to have a job, but things are so slow you never know if that job will continue. I have a bit of a side passion that I am pursuing as hard as I can so that hopefully one day it leads to something better.

    When I have days where I’m afraid or stressed, all I want is to go hit up all of my favorite spots online and lose myself in it. I’m not going to do that though. As soon as I hit post I’m going to sit down and meditate for ten minutes and hit the rest of my day with all my might. Here’s to today 17 turning to day 18.
     
  12. Thats the spirit. And i know what you meen about the uncertainty... trying times for sure.
     
  13. KevR24

    KevR24 Fapstronaut

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    Today I went to the office and did some work amongst some coworkers (most of my stuff is done at home bc Covid) and it’s crazy how that takes my mind off stuff. I think part of my problem right now is that I’m just always a freakin home able to bury myself in my darkest thoughts. I beat myself up for hours each day thinking about how I’m not a good partner, not fixable, and bound to never being happy.
     
  14. MeganScott51IVR

    MeganScott51IVR New Fapstronaut

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    remember you should never be ashamed of yourself
     
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