should I let her go?

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by PJT, Jul 19, 2019.

  1. elevate

    elevate Fapstronaut

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    He's probably thinking about you in the same way.

    What is your definition of female spirit? Passive? Non assertive? Avoiding conflict? These are all things you are doing by talking about this situation and how you feel about it to random people on an internet forum rather than to the woman involved.

    Tell her that it bothered you. Tell her that moving forward, if she enjoys having you in her life, that you expect more consideration from her than that.

    Don't be afraid of coming off as jealous. Because you are jealous. You want her and you don't like that she wants other guys. You're jealous. Be honest about it. She needs to know that. If she can't show you the respect that you're willing to tolerate, then why stay with her? If you're not enough for her and she doesn't value your relationship enough to not go around sabotaging it right in front of you, then why stay? Would you respect yourself if you did something similar to her or to anyone who you respect and value?

    Don't focus on the other guys. Focus on what you need to do.
     
    ItsInTheBag likes this.
  2. PJT

    PJT Fapstronaut

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    Female spirit is chaos. It has nothing to do with being passive or non assertive or avoiding conflict. The guy in the club was creating conflcit he was assertive and was clearly being chaotic trying to run up on a girl, albeit a chaotic girl, when she's already there with two guys. He was aware of what he was doing. He repeatedly talked to my girls roommate and her roommate to the point where was saying that he thought that dude was gay.

    Noted on the consideration part. I should do that.

    I'm not jealous. Why would I be jealous of a simp? Why would I be jealous of a side dude? I just felt like I was in a situation where the rationale decision to make, which is what I did also is the decision that is the most toughest to implement under the circumstances.

    Truth be told I'm more worried about the roommate. There's something between her and her roommate. How I confront that I don't know. I can't bring it up bc that's literally messing with their living situation. I suppose I just play it out and if there is something there then that's just what it is and i get over it. If not then she can prove herself with time that it's not. I've noticed that night that there is a simp nature to her roommate too. He seems to like chaos too. When we were at the lounge he was saying how he wanted this girl that another guy was talking to. That's chaotic and just silly. Same thing the other guy in the lounge was doing with my girl.
     
  3. PJT

    PJT Fapstronaut

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    Haha lol!
     
  4. PJT

    PJT Fapstronaut

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    Context is key. She doing this one day doesn't mean she behaved this way for the entire time I known her. This was the first time she acted that way in front of me.
     
  5. PJT

    PJT Fapstronaut

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    I want a distraction. I have a co-worker whom I have to see every day and she did me real dirty imo. It kills me that I have to see her every day and still root for her happiness even though shes not with me. There is no avoiding her it's only me and her that work out of the office. We have to be on the same page and we have to communicate.

    So I want a distraction. When I'm at work I don't want to think about my coworker being with someone else. If I could just remove myself from the situation...you know I don't even know if I would remove myself cause that's how much I care for her. Because if I leave she leaves that job too. I know she wouldn't continue there without me we both have issues with the owner.

    And these past two months have been a good distraction for me. Of all I know this girl I'm with might be looking for a distraction her damn self. I also get to kind of experience the different emotions first hand that go into relationships.

    And like the poster above mentioned I have been lonely for my whole life so I'm just trying to go through some of these things and gain some semblance of experience.
     
  6. PJT

    PJT Fapstronaut

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    I met a girl one time out of a club and had sex with her then again had sex with her like 3 weeks later. After that I never called her again.

    I have gone to bachelor parties in places in south america and paid to get laid.

    This girl I am currently speaking to then I guess kind of is the first "partner" so to speak of.

    Also when I was 16 i was talking to a girl who was from my same community but after I kissed her she broke it off with me. She said she thought we was moving too fast. I only bring this up bc i suppose it was a relationship as we were talking for a few months.

    I'm kind of a loner and moved far away from where I grew up. I don't have any friends of any consequence out here. I know not to bring this current girl to anyone of any consequence to me. Atleast not from what I have seen from her and I would have no problem telling that to her if it comes down to it.
     
  7. PJT

    PJT Fapstronaut

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    Hey @Augustin you were right. So I didn't see her roommate again until last Thursday and we went back to their place and again he jumped on her. Today I talked to her about it and she admitted that they kissed in the past but won't admit they had sex. They known each other for 3 years so I think that's BS. I went nuclear. I literally started a group text with her roommate and her and point blank asked if he had sex with her. I also called him out for being a loser, leaving two children fatherless, drinking every day, spending money on a motorcycle instead of getting a car he can potentially drive his kids in, leading this girl down the same path of drinking every day as him and told him for the sake of his roommates he should pack his sh*t and bring his misery to someone else. I don't really care what the girl has to say about it.

    I talked to her first, she said she was sorry and that what she did was wrong in the club and then trying to cuddle with him again on last Thursday. I told her sorry don't mean shit, and to kick that dude out of her house. She probably won't talk to me. I texted her as well. It's messed up bc I don't want to just let it go, I want 100% fealty to me. I want to like tell her to come to my place every day and make me food. i told her straight up to have her mother call me, kick the guy out her house and take a lie detector test. Sad thing is, I kind of am serious. It just sucks having to kind of break up and think about the time you invested, exposing yourself and then not heading the advice i got just for some pussy. I'm really disenchanted about the whole thing. I'm venting now, but hopefully i do not continue to text this girl and just leave it be. She didn't respond to my texts. She probably won't. It's over. Hopefully her roommate read those texts and learned a little something about himself from me. Her too.
     
    need4realchg likes this.
  8. Bro.

    I fucking love that somebody in nofap broke up with their girlfriend today too; it was the right thing to do—- and fuck doesn’t it suck.

    I broke up with my girl and I don’t even want to replay the scene on my mind. I fucking hate myself. I wanna go get plastered for real right now. Just trying to avoid the wrong places.

    Fuckkkk. Yeah I was crying like a pussy too. But man. It was the right thing to do.

    I am literally in your shoes man. Love you bro. Too bad I’m so damn far away. I’d say let’s go get a drink for sure tonight.
     
    PJT likes this.
  9. primaljade

    primaljade Fapstronaut

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    If you two have made it clear that you're monogamous, then neither of you should be doing anything that risks ending the relationship. If she doesn't get it, then yes, dump her for risking it. You might need to make this crystal clear, *calmly*, with solid and unwavering frame, for her to feel the dread and change her actions. A situation like this shouldn't even be happening when it's only been 2 *months*. If it's a solid relationship, then you'd be the only guy she'd be sexual with and she wouldn't want to risk it.
     
  10. primaljade

    primaljade Fapstronaut

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    Disregard my post, I see more happened since the 1st part of the thead I read.
     

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