Should I start approaching while rebooting?

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by Xeiny, Mar 21, 2019.

  1. Xeiny

    Xeiny Fapstronaut

    Hello everyone.

    Well, I think this is going to be a quite long post. So, bear with me.
    First of all, I have been on this forum for 3 years now. My longest streak was 29 days. My biggest issue is that I have this Fing limiting beliefe that I won't be able to break this toxic habit for good. I'm working on that now and I'm trying to affirm my self every single day while also taking care of my life and building new habits.

    Recently, I talked to this girl that I've known for 4 years. I liked her and I actually tried to take the relationship to the next level but because I'm such a nice guy she friend zoned me, I don't know if that is the main reason though. I stopped talking to her for nearly a year and blocked her on social media just to forget about her. But a couple of days ago I saw her at work and we talked for some time. I know that I'm still in the friend zone but I just can't keep thinking about her. I feel like she's become an obsession.
    I confess, I'm not the best when it comes to dealing with women and I need to work on that. I have anxiety around them and like I said I usually tend to be nice to them. However, to work on those issues and to forget about that girl I need to start approaching other girls.
    The question now, should I start approaching now while I'm still rebooting in the first month? or should I wait till I go beyond 30 days?
    What could I do to forget about that girl?
    R3dFlY likes this.
  2. SpoonDog

    SpoonDog Fapstronaut

    I'm a firm believer that life's too short not to start to take action right now, so get yourself out there. You can carry on doing NoFap in parallel.

    Get out there and start dating by whichever means you choose and those feelings will quickly fade when you start to meet new people.
    Nantz and Ghost79 like this.
  3. Capt. U

    Capt. U Fapstronaut

    Read up on some dating books. They can help you understand relationships and how to catch on, on certain cues. Or online and polish your skills.
    Deleted Account likes this.
  4. Marik757

    Marik757 Fapstronaut

    Dont put all your eggs in one basket. Glad you notice that. You will see a lot of people who will tell you to work on yourself first, but at some point you'll have to put into practice what you learned.

    So yes, do go and approach. Do it for experience. Do it for fun.

    As for approach anxiety I found this video helpful. You can apply the mindset to things outside of dating as well.
    Happypetal and Nantz like this.
  5. This is good advice. Now thanks to PUA there is a wealth of good info on dating and female psychology out there. Chasing girls while being totally ignorant of how they operate will just frustrate you.
  6. Ra's Al Ghul

    Ra's Al Ghul Fapstronaut

    Stick and move, stick and move.
  7. Sunny321

    Sunny321 Fapstronaut

    great advice, perhaps you should do so
  8. Dag

    Dag Fapstronaut

    try the approach anxiety program of

    That will kick the nice guy out of you, give you confidence and help A LOT with anxiety around woman.

    It's the best thing a man can be doing while nofap.
  9. Dag

    Dag Fapstronaut

    Basically you go baby steps at the time,

    Start asking 5 girls for the time, then addresses and slowly moving through innocent complements, funny and clumpsy stuff then getting physical like give her a hi-5, later on gets harder, but you are prepared and motivated for it.
  10. Dag

    Dag Fapstronaut

    Its a 8 week program, first day, you just ask for the time

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