Since I stopped porn, I become too much horny. Its killing me

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Tuner, Dec 20, 2016.

  1. Tuner

    Tuner New Fapstronaut

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    Sorry I dont read the forum rules because I'm desperate.

    I can stopped porn sucessfuly, but now, the shit reverse against me.
    Before, I didnt have too much desire for most of woman because I thought hot just pornstars body-types.

    NOW, I have too much desire for almost every girl, since its not too fat or ugly. This shit starts make me want to fuck almost every girl that I see in street. And if she just look at me in the eyes my mind starts to fantasiate HARDLY.

    I have some sex, but anyway, I wake up horny, almost every girl makes me boner instantly and once its started, in most of the times I just can release with masturbation. Result of that is that I FAP almost everyday and sometimes more than once.

    What the fuck is going on?
     
  2. ILoathePorn

    ILoathePorn Distinguished Fapstronaut

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    First, try to calm yourself. It sounds like you are not seeing women as objects as much as before. That is good. It does sound like there might be some objectifying happening. Rather than focusing on the physical side when it comes to women you see, maybe try focusing on the feeling side. Remember, real life isn't like porn. Women don't just have sex with anyone. They want a connection, and someone that they can trust. That is how it should be for us as well. I hope this helps. I am sure you will receive other better advise from others as well.

    Stay strong!!
     
    Dizzy Lotus and thefaptrap like this.
  3. Tuner

    Tuner New Fapstronaut

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    Thanks.

    with all humility, I'm attractive, so I end up getting some flirting eyes. Maybe this combined with the transformation of "not seeing women as much as before" but still having the "porn-just-like-that-happens" mindset, was short circuit in my brain
     
  4. ILoathePorn

    ILoathePorn Distinguished Fapstronaut

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    I think this is a very good analysis on your part. Keep working at it. This isn't an easy addiction to overcome. Take one day at a time.
     
    Dizzy Lotus likes this.
  5. Tuner

    Tuner New Fapstronaut

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    Thanks.

    But just positive texts isnt what I need for now.
    I come here to learn some tips to help me to overcome all this bullshit period.
     
  6. thefaptrap

    thefaptrap Fapstronaut

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    watching P all these years has twisted our idea's to how women are portrayed in our eyes.

    It almost brain washes our instinct's to one track thinking.

    BUT:

    thats why we're here, to erase that thinking from our brains and appreciate women and not objectify.

    to have self control and discipline

    Thats why we started all this, we want change in ourselves for the better.
    We are not forced to do this, we do it to ourselves. Everyone here is wanting something better than P in their life or we wouldnt be doing this to ourselves in the first place and we wouldnt be here.

    my suggestion would be to when you see a beautiful woman, to go and try to talk to her. especially if she smiled at you. Focus on the conversation and small talk in getting to know HER. Dont look down at her body, look at her face, her expressions and her talking. you'll find more meaning from that then wild fantasies about her. once u make that connection in your brain, i believe things will change.
     
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  7. Tuner

    Tuner New Fapstronaut

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    I already do it sometimes, and I get some numbers too. But, the problem is when I go to home and remember her. Its really worst because now my dirty mind imagine with much more details because now I know her smell, her voice, her touch... I'm fucked up
     
    thefaptrap likes this.
  8. JasonIsReal

    JasonIsReal Fapstronaut

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    The key is to quit both porn and masturbation. Most of the people go experiencing big changes at day90. But another key, the most underastimated key is overcoming lust. You just need to overcome a lust addiction. Porn is just one element of lust. Lust is the bigger picture of the addiction. Thats why people keep failing even after years of quiting.

    You need to overcome lust by beating it in all ways: porn, objectifying woman, fantasizing, one night stand etc. This takes a long time and good discipline. The other thing is to replace lust with love. Lust is the 2nd most powerful energy in the world, love the nr1 most powerful. Once you got this under control you have been rebooted for 100%.

    This is just logical.. I mean quiting porn is huge but its not the core of the addiction. The real addiction in its total is lust.
     
    thefaptrap likes this.
  9. ILoathePorn

    ILoathePorn Distinguished Fapstronaut

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    We all are in one way or another. The thing you have to remember is that porn has twisted your whole view of the world. Try to focus on the person you want to be. Then try and focus on the person you want to be around females. They are kinda the same, but maybe this can help to focus your mind. One of the things that I started was the voice in my head. I let that voice be loud and commanding. So whenever a fantasy tries to start, I hear this very loud STOP IT in my head. For you it is that feeling your brain gets with what you described. Let that voice help guide you. You can call it what you want, your buddy, your conscious or whatever name you want to give it. It can help you to refocus and remind you of who you want to be. I hope this helps.
     
    thefaptrap likes this.
  10. You can control yourself if you really want to you know... But you need to want it and you can't blame your body for what you are going through. Your body is simply an organism that can and in fact wants to live without these urges you are having. You have to overcome these urges using willpower it's as simple as that. Addictions can and must be overcome by the power of your spirit. If you say NO your body WILL listen. When you look a girl in the eye that is you lusting after her not your body, your body is simply an instrument you are using to satisfy your desire.

    The mind is totally capable of controlling the body, if it weren't you'd be masturbating in public. You need to ask yourself these questions. Why don't you masturbate out in public? Because you know it wouldn't be appropriate. Your body doesn't need or want masturbation in fact it hates masturbation because the fluid you are spilling is full of life force. There's no one that is telling you to masturbate at home. It seems more appropriate to do it at home but it's not. You feel miserable time after time.
    If I were you I'd look into meditation and prayer. Stay strong and know that you are capable of taming the beast that is constantly trying to tempt you. We weren't meant to simply be reproductive machines and you are exhausting yourself with this habit.

    You made the right decision coming here and looking for help. Girls are indeed pretty but you know what, make them want YOU. You'll be so much happier when you are able to control this thing. Instead of lusting after girls you'll have them lining up just to date you. Be that man. No one is telling you to masturbate and no not your body it's your mind that is full of lust. Learn to control your mind and you'll be okay.

    Cheers
     
    thefaptrap likes this.
  11. Traditionalist

    Traditionalist Fapstronaut

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    Custody of the eyes and controlling your thoughts is very important. Trying your best to not look at any woman who you're not actually planning to pursue for more than a moment, trying your best not to look at her features that may turn you on (e.g., butt, breasts). Your thoughts in that you have to pay attention to what you're thinking about. Don't allow yourself to think about any woman's beauty in anything more than "she's pretty/gorgeous" or at worst "she has a nice ____." If you go into the realm of thinking about sex then you've got to catch yourself and control your thoughts.
     

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