(i am a 26 year old girl ex s. and p addict) back now at dating after 1 year and havent kissed in 2 years thing is now i have been on two 1st dates (one in February and one last night), no kisses with these dates but i realized that it bugs me the fact my libido dropped a lot. and i mean A LOT I once said to a guy then became my last guy during a date "don't worry I won't rape you" and he replied "hopefully tonight you will" or another guy with whom i didn't kiss, nothing during a date i told him, i was a bit tipsy "go to the toilet, i will come and rape you and i will be the man between me and you". before that date i remember i told him that he was like hanging out with a friend with him on our first date and then i said he should have shown me he was straight on our 2nd date 6 months later when i was bored and i texted him. he then replied he would have shown me he wasn't gay. this was me I mean i was not patient and very straight-forward. i have a sort of crisis, i dunno who i am anymore and if i can apply this behaviour still and this doesn't belong to me anymore but was linked to the addict in me that now is gone last night i was zero attracted for that guy. it was literally like being out with a cousin or a girl. he was not bad with the body, he wasn't confident though. yeah we very different and i could tell we both "hated" each other's personalities all my previous dating when i kissed and had s. my libido was strong. this reboot changed my libido a lot. i was very aggressive and upfront with my behaviour with my guys and now i dunno if that still suits me or i am just too different and it doesn't work for me anymore. Before I was less picky with getting attracted to guys now it happens rarely maybe drinking more alcohol would help to release stress about the fact i haven't kissed in 2 years and afraid i forgot how to do it. maybe i should be patient and go on dates with guys i can think to have some attraction and not settling with guys that wouldn't be my first choice am i the only one to face this? I have been rebooting for a year. it is like now i need a much higher stimuli from a guy to get aroused or i am s. dead and i don't feel anything any advice?