Sissy addiction. Help

Hey
I know it must be really painful and hard but just hold on and keep trying. One day sooner or later you will get better. Everything can be repeated in your life but your life can not be repeated so we are all there for you. We will be praying for you as praying can do miracles. I am a strong believer in God and I believe that God loves us more than 70 mothers. Just hold on and keep trying. Love you

 

Sometimes it's exactly when we think that we are doomed that a breakthrough happens and we find a way out.
If you want to continue exploring your sissy and femdom fantasies, then do that. (Or try, it can be really hard to find the right partner - I spent years trying and nothing came close to my fantasies or what I could find online)
Or, give up. Acknowledge that you are powerless. This addiction is ruining your life. And yet you can't stop with the PMO.
That's great! Because there's help for that.
I would suggest looking into 12 step programs for sex addiction. The first step is admitting that you are powerless over your addiction and that your life is unmanageable. Hooray! You're already past step one!

 

Woah, that is extreme! But I have to be honest I relate to your struggles more than I'd like to admit in all honesty, Not to the point of complete sissy hypno or going under M to F surgery but I do have some more submissive desires as well as some feminine desires of my own for the majority of the time I want to be as macho and masculine as I possibly can but I feel like some of my desires get in my way. I have a foot fetish and I'm also interested in CBT (Cock and ball torture) and and mild chastity. As for the feminine part the most I am willing to go is letting my future wife/girlfriend I am with paint my toenails or put lipstick on me. Other than that nothing more. I understand that most of my desires will hinder my ability to form a normal relationship but I've been trying to get rid of my foot fetish since I discovered I had one and been trying for months to get rid of the CBT fetish thing. I'm also trying to convert to Catholicism and I understand that my desires conflict with the teachings of the religion.

 

Try this Book 'Recovery - Free From Addiction'

 

Porn is only fantasy and it isn't real. And I think you (and everyone here) took the fantasy too far. You must understand that it is only fantasy and you will not like it when it becomes a reality. My fantasy right now is that I am doing an EXPERIMENT in nofap. I must continuing the experiment, so no porn at all. It works for me that way. My cold turkey withdrawel symptoms are becoming weaker. My sexual fantasy desires are getting weaker too. In other words: it works for me. My neural paths stopped bombarding the sexual pleasure center. My brain fog is shrinking...And I understand I was in fantasyland the whole time. Life is so much more than sex/ orgasms. Today, I do not think about the fantasy that much anymore like last month in NoFap mode. You need goals in your life that aren't fantasy. And being a sissy... how can that be a goal in life? It's a fantasy. Remember: one day you will become 40 yo.. 50 yo... you do not want to be a sissy then. It must be tragic... Stop the fantasy with some other fantasy, so the first fantasy will lose its grip on you. I barely think about my old fantasy's anymore... but I gave up internet at home... That makes it easier... Get back the control over your head and brain... and kick the fantasy out!

 

Don't give up on finding professional help. It took me many tries to find someone to help with my depression. It's frustrating to have to start over with a new therapist, but when you find the right person, it will make a huge difference. Look for someone who says they have experience with gender issues in their profile materials.

Stop and consider what you've said here - your PMO started as a way to escape bad feelings. This is at the root of our addictions for so many of us. And it has nothing to do with fetishes or gender identity. Putting priority on this one thing may make all the others more manageable. Figuring out how to manage a mood disorder -- through medication, talk therapy, etc. -- would be my priority. For now forget about and don't worry about all the other stuff.

Now, it may be that you are actually trans in some sense, and it may be that will be hard for you to come to terms with. But it might also be that much of this is porn escalation. Getting your mood dealt with and your resulting PMO addiction should make it easier to really understand where your trans feelings are coming from. Are they really you or not. But I would try to put concerns about that on the backburner for now.

 

I come here when I feel bad for acting out and being on here makes feel better because after I use and watch I feel like crap. But then I come on here where I find people with the same struggle and you guys aren't crap so why am I so hard on myself.

Let me tell everyone my opinion, unwanted fetishes and porn addiction aren't the same. A fetish has a root or trauma and porn addiction it more like just an abuse of a substance (oxytocin and dopamine). NoFap alone will cure porn addiction but not nessecarily an unwanted fetish. For unwanted fetishes, you have to look deep inside for physiological triggers or open wounds. Maybe its a negative mindset or perception of yourself (most common). Then this is where talking to a therapist helps to help change and cultivate self esteem. Friends or positive relationships also play a major role. My therapist says "we are usually hurt in relationships, and so we also heal in relationships".

But overall what I encourage anyone dealing with this is, learn to accept, respect and love yourself. Becoming a sissy or being feminized is becoming something or someone else. But if you loved yourself so much then why would you want to be anybody else?

Then there are people who say that being you are a woman and you should just love side or part of yourself. Or that you should just be accepting of yourself in that way. When I was about 6 years old I remember watching Spiderman and I wanted to be Maryjane. I remember i got Spiderman lego set and i remember wishing so bad once that i wanted to be a girl.. I started to wear girls clothing any chance I had. Before I knew porn. Why do I say this? Because anyone would argue that I should've been trans. But here's my case, I grew older with this and I knew that thats not who I wanted to be. But I have these issues still. Why?

I have learned to accept myself. My true self. My man self. The person I was that my peers made fun of in school. My person whom my mom was so hard on and would call names. My person who "wasn't man enough" to hang out with dad.

But I am enough. And you are too.

You don't need to be feminized to be accepted. You don't need to be a sissy because that's what people saw you as. Look in the mirror and if calling yourself a sissy sounds positive, then I'm wrong. Cancel me. But if it sounds negative, then apply a couple of the thing I mentioned. Keep trying. Keep searching. Fall 1000 times and get back up 1000.

 

i would post the video but i have been warned by the tyrannical mods so try to look up Maximizing alphaness on youtube, thank me later.

 

This sounds like classic 'porn conditioning' to me. I went through a very similar thing with sissy porn.

You see porn showing a certain lifestyle and you want to replicate it in real life.

But it's important to take a step back:
- Porn conditioned you to sissy interests
- You can be conditioned to ANYTHING through arousal
- You're trying to live a life based on something you're NOT naturally attracted to

When I originally wanted to give up porn, I didn't think a lot of my strange kinks would go away. But over time, just about all of them did.

Does that mean sex is less interesting? I don't think so. It's just more focused on things that you'd normally be into.

It takes time but you can slowly rebuild your life man.

 

The first thing is to not beat yourself up about it. I’m not saying that to comfort you but I’m telling you that because addiction feeds on guilt, so quit that.

Second, it’d be worth while to get your testosterone levels checked. If you know you’re a man and porn abuse conditioning has fucked you up, then get a test done to know where you’re at. Low testosterone doesn’t mean you’re gay, but what it can do is make you feel like less of a man and make you susceptible to this type of crap.

Third thing, get VITAMIN D. This can lead to all types of issues including poor mental health, misuse, low hormones and everything. You can get a test done or you can go outside for 30 minutes a day peak sun hours.

Fourth is to stop watching this shit. It is going to kill you mentally. Stop torturing yourself. NoFap isn’t going to save you. You have done a lot of damage to yourself so you need to condition your brain to get off to the right things. No more sissy whatever and no more Man/Woman porn. Only female masturbation porn from here on out until you are recovered.

Everything else is bullcrap. NoFap is only delaying the inevitable so just make sure to get off to the female masturbation porn as stated and go that route. You NEED rewiring and you won’t get it through abstaining. Only abstain from the shitty porn you’re watching now.

Take care, friend

 

Yep... everything in our body very much works in a 'use it or lose it' manner. IMO the strange kinks will eventually die off if you do not feed them any longer. Staying away from porn forever should be our goal.

 

I think this is a good point. Some people can stop it all straight away and of course that would be the best way. However, when we're in the deep end and struggling to get our lives in shape, that method often isn't realistic.

If I had my early NoFap days again, I would switch to female solo porn and not attach so much shame to it.

Just have to keep in mind OP that this is a short-term plan. Steps should also be in place to then do that PMO less frequently, while adding more real-world achievements. And long-term leave it all behind, but have a fulfilling meaningful life you're content with.

It might seem unimaginable to have that balanced lifestyle now, but we only get there with small steps.

 

Small steps demands an enormous amount of self-discipline and that seems to be the problem for most of us. I tried tons of times. It's impossible. The most simple plans are often the best ones and in this case you stop and don't look back. Going cold turkey works for me. Those first 6 weeks were tough... but that is how my brain and body are dealing with this sudden change. Watching female porn wouldn't work for Paladin 32. He would be imagining that he's the woman in the porn movie. And I understood he has narcisistic parents. His problems are unforseeable. He is thaught to be submissive and meaningless. I hope he can find the strength to fight this, which could be done by real life accomplishments. Success is the best revenge there is.

 

Hey Paladin32, when I started NoFap I could only get 1-3 day streaks, but now I'm on a 15 day streak! Even though you think you can't do long streaks on NoFap that's alright. Continually doing 1-2 day NoFap streaks is still beneficial because the volume of sissy porn you're consuming is significantly decreased. Eventually getting a longer streak will feel easier.
Sissy porn can really screw up your gender. The only way to truly know whether or not you are trans is to get away from porn! The reason I say this is because PMO urges can manifest themselves in desires to become a woman. Get to Day 90 on NoFap, so that you remove your porn addiction. Then you can evaluate whether you are trans or not.

 

Throw out your supplements

 

Hi friend, I was in the same place envious of that abomination, more precisely I was addicted to pornography that escalated into sissy. What you need to know is that there is a way out and it is easy to win, but you have to listen to me well now, don't tell you this but anyone who has been in the same place and why so deeply that he came in contact with a transgender person, thank God there was nothing there but correspondence. Not to mention the abominations from those video garbage that I applied to myself, I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy. I've been on that site for months, but what kept me from failing completely in those worst moments was God, to whom I regularly prayed to deliver me from evil, and the answer from him came in the form of a book, I'll just tell you Allen Car's method for leaving pmo. It explains to you how an addict switches from harder and harder genres to release too much dopamine. I still fight with traps and there will always be, but the most important thing is not to fall into them and to live a life that is full of that inner true happiness, because I am aware that I have defeated myself and that is the hardest fight.

 

Glad you said that, my psychotherapist allows me to visit female sex workers if I like but encourages me to relieve myself to more healthier material or fantasy but gradually I’m moving away from the sex workers too. I just find both behaviours very different. For example I could have had an awesome workout and be buzzing with endorphins and testosterone maybe talked to a few girls but not feel ready for dating especially drinking dating till I’ve got my life in a better place. So a skilled hot female escort could help with letting off some of that masculine steam in a healthy sexual way and leave me feeling good about myself. Yet femdom, transwomen comes from a place of stress and feeling overwhelmed that I want to escape and punish myself. Usually after drinking or messing something up ( I do realise though that escorts are usually fuelled by unresolved traumas and drug addiction so everyone one involved is unhealthy) A good fuck can make me feel more masculine though, but a lot better if done where there’s connection. Reducing the shame helps massively. All the rigidity and standards actually made it more taboo and an intense way to escape. If I was going to mess up I might as well degrade myself for failing. Low self esteem can lead us to act out negative core beliefs and also be punished. So lots of self encouragement and love does wonders. I used to watch that hypno stuff and allow it encourage me to visit transwomen and abuse myself. I’m still early on this journey to recovery, but I’ve been battling it for years and finally things are starting to changing for the better through therapy. Although it’s took 6 therapist to get it right so don’t loose hope. Psychotherapy rather than counsellor or addiction coach seems better. There’s been a lot of times where I’ve led to that genre while searching and been able to say this is stupid and why do I want to do this to myself and turn it off, this had been when I’ve been fully aroused and in the act. So I’d say that’s big progress rather than holding off with will power for years but not actually dealing with these negative core beliefs that are fuelliing it. You can get out of it dude and you deserve to just keep getting back up and encouraging rather than Scolding yourself. I’ve just started a good book Brene Brown who works with shame maybe that could help you. Good luck