Sissy-boy wildly brainfucked on porn. HELP?

A

Amanda

Guest
Hey ya'll, my name is Amanda. I have been a very openly gay and flamboyant wild drag queen since about age 13. I have a massive YouTube following (341,300 so far) doing "Boy to Girl Full Body Transformation" videos. I began performing at clubs at age 16 from NYC to Tampa to San Fransisco --- moving to becoming a total sissy-boy and a trap/transgendered person. I do online fapping shows for horny old men 3 times per week

I was a contestant on RuPauls Drag Race 6 but I had to pull out 2 weeks prior to shooting because I had come down w mono. Point is, I am fierce, fine, and a totally fuckable fishy look. passable as they come, "style, grace, giving good face".

I am now 23 years old, and began my HRT (hormone replacement therapy) to transition from a guy to a woman. I realized, I am not gay.

I am transgender.

My problem is
I have spent my days masterbating about 4-6 times per day for the past 10 years. Thats almost HALF MY LIFE!!! My fetish is sissy hypnosis and sissy porn and muscular men masterbating, which I have watched at least 5-8 hrs per day for a decade, every day. I started having oral sex w boys in high school, and now just can't seemed to get fucked enough no matter how many guys i get.
I can't stop watching this stuff. No matter what I do I can not stop. I am here to try to stop this behavior. Does anyone else deal with this??

If i am to become a woman, I want to be a good woman, not a porn addict
 
Welcome to NoFap where you are amongst friends who are here to encourage you and sometimes challenge you but not judge you.

I have not dealt with this issue but @Jamie_K_ is one who can help you the most in this area. I've just tagged Jamie and if there is no response, search her out for someone who can understand where you are on your journey.
 
I'm sorry that I have nothing to say that would likely help.
I do struggle with gender issues myself though so if you ever need to talk, know that I won't be judgemental.
I hope there are folks here who can help.
 
Amanda said:
Hey ya'll, my name is Amanda. I have been a very openly gay and flamboyant wild drag queen since about age 13. I have a massive YouTube following (341,300 so far) doing "Boy to Girl Full Body Transformation" videos. I began performing at clubs at age 16 from NYC to Tampa to San Fransisco --- moving to becoming a total sissy-boy and a trap/transgendered person. I do online fapping shows for horny old men 3 times per week

I was a contestant on RuPauls Drag Race 6 but I had to pull out 2 weeks prior to shooting because I had come down w mono. Point is, I am fierce, fine, and a totally fuckable fishy look. passable as they come, "style, grace, giving good face".

I am now 23 years old, and began my HRT (hormone replacement therapy) to transition from a guy to a woman. I realized, I am not gay.

I am transgender.

My problem is
I have spent my days masterbating about 4-6 times per day for the past 10 years. Thats almost HALF MY LIFE!!! My fetish is sissy hypnosis and sissy porn and muscular men masterbating, which I have watched at least 5-8 hrs per day for a decade, every day. I started having oral sex w boys in high school, and now just can't seemed to get fucked enough no matter how many guys i get.
I can't stop watching this stuff. No matter what I do I can not stop. I am here to try to stop this behavior. Does anyone else deal with this??

If i am to become a woman, I want to be a good woman, not a porn addict
Click to expand...

I don't know if you will see my answer, but i answer anyway. I must know more info to help you, you don't talk about how you became a sissy porn addict.
My first analysis is that it ain't really bother you, because you're proud of being a fuckable toy, so i think that now, you're living you sexual fantasy h24. You need to know who you really are. You began HRT with porn ? And how you realized you didn't like men ? You need to give more infos. I must define your case to help you, if you want , you can go in private and i will try to help you ;), and i don't judge you, i am a victim of sissy porn too, but i'm finding solutions that i want to share with people , because i'm aware that not everybody can analyse themselves.
 
Hi Amanda,

Welcome here.
I just want to let my heart speak to you.
On one side, my heart is crying for what you wrote.
You are addicted, bound, enslaved, and pulled into a world of lust, sex and seduction. :(

You have gone all the way from an insecure boy to the transition as woman.
The insecurity (and fear) is your deepest problem. The transition will not change that.
I know stories from people who changed their gender and later the felt regret badly, because it didn't solve their root issues.

You 're telling us you are strongly addicted to sissy hypno, sissy porn and all the stuff around it.
Also you share your life on youtube

seducing others into this wicked and extremely dangerous web of death and destruction​

I truly hope that you will see that your videos make it possible to destroy lifes of so many other man and woman, do you understand? Is that really what you want?

Amanda, I've been involved in sissy and feminization stuff for a very long time.
I know what this is about. Please read my posts here and read the stories of others.
I hope you will get an understanding what is the truth around your "longing to be woman".
In no single way I believe that you will be happier then. You have to go back to your roots and fix the problems which are deeply covered inside yourself.

For me it's crystal clear that you are trapped in satans web of lust and seduction.
Satan is a sinner from the beginning, seducing others to sin also. He is a slave of sin, and he only can create other slaves.
If you want to become free, go to Jesus. Only He can free you out of this web.
That's at least my own experience.

In no single way I want to judge you, or hurt you, but please, try to understand what I (and many other here on nofap) try to tell you.

If i am to become a woman, I want to be a good woman, not a porn addict
Click to expand...
First work on your addiction.
At the time you 've grown out of it, I bet your urge to be feminine will be gone.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top