Small Pen*s Club - (males, females and non-binary welcome)

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by +TenPercent, Feb 3, 2021.

  1. she-dernatinus

    she-dernatinus Fapstronaut

    That's the most hilarious thing I've ever read. It won't go away, don't worry.
    LouBee and +TenPercent like this.
  2. Thanks! :)
    I appreciate your sense of humour and the reassurance.

    And, maybe if it does keep getting smaller, that'll just make it that much cuter :p
  3. Hard Mode

    Hard Mode Fapstronaut


    After I short conversation with the moderator of this thread, I was encourage to share some thoughts here on what it's like to be well hung. I mean no offense to anyone with this. Just wanna explore the differences and learn what it's like to be "on the other side".

    Being hung above average is usually a good thing, but it can be a double edged sword. Women often like big ones, but it can also be hard for them to take it sometimes. You have to find the right positions, use adequate lube, and be careful. Or she might complain.

    Another "downside" can be that unwanted erections can be difficult to hide. This especially became a problem for me during my military service where I was adhering to a Hard Mode NoFap (more due to circumstances than by choice, at that time), and was forced to shower with others communally. Guys would look, comment and tease, and you can't do much about it. At the same time, I knew some of them were secretly miring, with was a good feeling of course.

    I have also been in more uncomfortable situations, where I know people after having seen I am hung have tried to "get back at me" because of some sick need of trying to put me in my place because of my size. I had some humiliating situations because of that.

    But usually I would say having a large penis is a blessing due to our societal norms that being hung makes you some kind of "alpha". It's weird, but common in most cultures, I think.

    I'd love to hear from small guys how you deal with being small, and what you feel (if anything?) when being confronted with a hung man. Share here or DM me, whichever is more comfortable to you!

    Peace to all from a hung guy who's been in Hard Mode for 2+ months now. :)

    LouBee and +TenPercent like this.
  4. Vanquisher12

    Vanquisher12 Fapstronaut

    3-4” when flaccid, at least 6” when erect. My only concern is that my cock is perhaps slightly thinner than average, but to be honest any girl worth my love will not worry about the size of my penis, and will be more interested in the man who wields it.
    LouBee, +TenPercent and Hard Mode like this.
  5. ProminentPosterior

    ProminentPosterior Fapstronaut

    Contrary to what’s depicted in porn, large ding dongs aren’t all they’re made out to be. Sure, I’ll never get tired of hearing, “I can’t even wrap my hand around it” whenever I’m with someone new but... Jaws get tired, vag’s get sore. Couple that with DE from porn addiction and DeathGrip™ makes sex a very, very difficult thing for me to get pleasure from.
    LouBee, Vanquisher12 and +TenPercent like this.
  6. Well said @Vanquisher12 particularly the choice of words which focus on the character of the man, as opposed to how it is used :cool:
    @Hard Mode Thank you for posting. Even if no one responds directly, this thread does get a lot of views and I'm sure your post will help some. I appreciate your sharing some of the challenges that go with being well hung, and how you might even get teased or targeted by other guys. Unfortunately that is human nature, just like how we might pick on someone for being too smart, or for being too popular with the ladies. Or, maybe it's similar to the way that some guys always want to fight the biggest guy in the room . . . just to prove something.
    To answer the latter part of the question directly and hopefully without being too graphic or triggering - all things being equal, I feel inferior when confronted by a man with a much larger penis. Not inferior on all levels, but usually physically inferior (there really is such a thing as testosterone levels and well hung men tend to have more muscle development) and definitely sexually inferior. In some instances, especially if this man is a potential competitor for female mates, I sometimes get aroused :rolleyes:
    I think the feelings of arousal and frustration that I feel are due to the fact that no matter how hard I get, I will never be as large as I truly well hung man.

    That said, we are each of us a package deal. I have also been in plenty of locker rooms (and in the showers in the military) and saw how very different mens penises, and their bodies can be. In those instances I might feel ashamed of my size, but not necessarily intimidated by other men. Most guys are hung larger than me, but that doesn't mean I would want to trade places with them.

    I have written some of this already, but I will list some of the pros and cons of having a small penis:

    • less embarrassing (potentially) if I get an erection in public
    • less bulge showing (sometimes it's embarrassing that you can make out too much of a guys penis shape through his pants
    • not threatening to women - don't have to worry about it being too big
    • I actually had one woman ask me to have anal sex with her. Not kidding! It was her first time and she wanted to try it with me after she saw how small it was. :)
    • Peeing is harder sometimes if your wearing thick clothes or a lot of layers
    • Always being one of the smallest guys flaccid
    • When it's cold - it gets really, really small!
    • Worried that any woman will ever see you with an erection (and see that it really isn't that much of a "grower"
    • Always wondering if the girl you are with is unhappy
    • Not being able to do certain positions
    • Condoms not fitting well, slipping off or rolling back up
    • Every time you fool around with a girl and don't go all the way, or even if you do go all the way but only once, then wondering if it was because you are too small
    • Worried that girls can just tell that you have a small one
    • Worried that girls (or the guys in the locker room) will tell other girls that you have a small one
    • Extra-sesitive? My theory is that we all have roughly the same number of nerves in our penises, which means they are more condensed in a small one . . . which can lead to increased sensitivity and premature ejaculation . . . The worst combo! Small and premature! :eek:
    • Not feeling comfortable naked
    • Knowing that if your girl does have sex with other men, she'll be more likely to get pregnant by them and not you.
    • Feeling like you can't fill the bulge in some brands of mens underwear and too much movement in the bulge when active which can lead to friction and unwanted sexual feelings.
    • Always afraid that your girl might be satisfied now, but that she won't be if she ever sleeps with a larger man
    LouBee likes this.
  7. Hard Mode

    Hard Mode Fapstronaut

    I am impressed by your honesty in these matters. Not many men would admit something like that. It helps me understand where you are coming from and how it can feel for some men to be small. Thanks!

    You also mentioned that being small AND premature is the worst combo. I can imagine that. Have you had those issues yourself? And do you think that your size has anything to do with your decision to NoFap?
    LouBee and +TenPercent like this.
  8. RiverBlue

    RiverBlue Fapstronaut

    Based on my own well-endowed experience, I can say that each of your "cons" has a corresponding "pro" for a man with a large penis.

    But, not bragging, I don't think your "pro's" really hold up.

    I've never felt embarrassed by an erection, even when it's visible in public. Yes, I might have to (discreetly) reach in to rearrange myself a bit so my boner isn't too distracting, but that's not much of a "con." And if/when my boner is noticed, while some women (and men) will look away and even blush, I've never suffered any negative consequence. In fact, I've experienced the opposite -- that is, an increased level of, shall we say, respect. :)

    Again, I am not embarrassed by this. Generally I think my bulge is attractive. I particular choose pants that will show it off to good effect. I particularly like button-fly Levi's for this reason.

    I've never had any woman turn my down, because I'm "too" big. Yes, there have been some women who've been a bit concerned in advance, but none have refused to have me in them. And once they realize I know how to handle my larger size without injuring them, they pretty much all have enjoyed it. And, as for men, they never say "No." LOL

    Again, I've not had much problem with this either. I've had plenty of anal with women. Again, it's a matter of trust. Once I've been with them, they understand I know how to make it all feel good -- and maybe better due to my size.
    LouBee and +TenPercent like this.
  9. Hard Mode

    Hard Mode Fapstronaut

    @RiverBlue , I agree with you 100%. I didn't want to sound like I was putting @+TenPercent down, but (and no disrespect to him) his list of cons is much longer than his list of pros, and the pros don't really hold up at all. I'm afraid he might just trying to make himself feel better by pretending there are as many pros with being small as with being hung.

    Again, no offense to you @+TenPercent, but we need to be honest here or there is no point.
    LouBee, +TenPercent and RiverBlue like this.
  10. Vanquisher12

    Vanquisher12 Fapstronaut

    A lot of the “cons” here are more due to self-esteem issues caused by having a small cock, rather than the small cock itself, and luckily, while a small cock can’t be changed without risking injury, self-esteem issues can. I certainly know how you feel with regards to these issues because I used to worry about them myself, but the thing is, as long as you feel these cons are real and that they make you inferior to other men just because of something you can't change (your penis size), you're essentially accepting defeat and allowing these other men to claim your girls without any sort of fight. If you press on regardless and keep working on building yourself into a more attractive man in other ways, on the other hand, then you'll succeed against the odds, which is a particularly great feeling.

    One of the most interesting pieces of advice Pinnacle of Man gives is that:
    Perceived mate value = actual mate value
    which is true - if you believe yourself to be a high value male, then the fact that you're willing to put yourself out there and keep trying, plus the fact that you're not going to let any bozo, with a bigger dick or not, get in your way, will prompt the right girls to see you as a high-value male, because you have the motivation and purpose to do it. Indeed if a guy with a bigger dick shames you just because of something you're born with, he's proving he's weaker than you, because he thinks it's big-man behaviour to take the piss when it isn't and he isn't comfortable with accepting you as you are. If, on the other hand, you believe yourself to be a low-value male, and that any attempt to attract a girl will prove fruitless just because of your flaws, then you will be low-value, because you won't have the motivation or confidence to rise above your flaws and suppress them, and people will end up defining you by your flaws.

    Well if she does that, that’s the signal for you to denounce her as a w***e and leave her, because she obviously doesn't respect you enough to want to have an exclusive relationship with you. Don’t let yourself be humiliated into raising other men’s children, you deserve better than that. Don't be afraid to walk away, because you are the prize, not her, and because she'll be letting a good man disappear from her life, it's her problem, not yours. As I said before, any girl who is truly worth your love will sleep with you and only you, because she likes you for all of you and not just your penis, and she won’t be tempted by other men because those men may not have personalities that make her feel comfortable, safe or loved in the way you do. And even if you don't find the girl of your dreams, at least you're not being shamed by a slutty girl who's spineless enough to let other men ravage her behind your back just because some primitive instinct tells her to.

    And with regards to peeing, just use a proper toilet cubicle rather than a urinal and drop your trousers and underwear completely. I do this all the time and I do not care what others think of me for that.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 29, 2021
    +TenPercent likes this.
  11. Hard Mode

    Hard Mode Fapstronaut

    Hey @+TenPercent,

    I asked you a couple questions earlier in the thread, but you never responded:

    Do you suffer from premature ejaculation?
    Do you think that your size has anything to do with your decision to NoFap?

    I'd love to get some answers, bro.

    @RiverBlue and I were talking in a private message, and as Hung guys we were trying to understand where you come from on all this. It's a little strange to us that you are so vividly "defending" having a small dick. You admit that you feel inferior to Hung bros, but at the same time you are listing "pros" of having a smaller penis. It doesn't add up, man.

    I get the feeling that in talking about the "benefits" of being small you are just grasping for straws (pun intended), and trying to make yourself feel better about your shortcomings. I don't think that's healthy.

    The fact that you have a small penis seems to have a profound impact on your sex life and life in general, to the point that you even started a thread about it here. I believe that if you are gonna be successful in your recovery, you have to begin to accept who you are and what it means to be small. You have to deal with the fact that there are very few people in our society who will admire or envy you for your small size, no one will wish that they had what you have, and your manhood (boyhood?) will never be a nice surprise for any of your sex partners.

    Bro, I am not saying this to be mean or to put you down. It's just reality. And the quicker you accept this and start living your life accordingly, the happier you will be. Stop kidding yourself and thinking that there are long lists of "pros" to having small dick. There are not. The best you can hope for is that women will not care that you're small, but that's about as good as it will ever get.

    I saw you posted your measurements here, 4 1/4 inches erect, correct? My penis is bigger than that in its flaccid state! You need to face the facts, bro, not trying to hide behind lists of excuses. I mean no offense, just being honest with you for your own good.

    I know this can't be easy for you. If you need to talk, your Hung bros are here for support.

    ChangePMO, +TenPercent and RiverBlue like this.
  12. Hmm . . . not the initial decision, but I think it's a big part of why I have stayed. I think it's real easy for smaller guys to get stuck in a PMO habit and to go down the rabbit hole with all the degrading and emasculating porn out there (cuckold, femdom, gooner, SPH, sissy, etc.).
    Also, since I do recognise that I come up short in the department, it seems like I can counter that by trying to be a better man through NoFap and semen retention.

    Short answer - yes.
    Not when I was doing PMO. I had DE then . . . and thought that made me pretty cool. :cool:

    Lately, I have been struggling with it a lot. Especially when I am feeling inadequate . . . the thought pops into my mind about how it would be even more pathetic if I had PE and then, next thing I know, I'm ejaculating.

    it happened while I was getting waxed! :eek:
    I have been getting waxed for a long time (they say it makes it look bigger) and have usually managed to control myself, but the second to last time that I went, I started feeling really awkward. The girl who was waxing me was awkward, and that made it hard not to think about how she was touching me and how she could see how small it was (and would she tell the other girls there?) Panic set in, my heart started racing and, next thing I knew, I was ejaculating . . . without even having an erection! :oops:
  13. Thank you @Hard Mode and @RiverBlue for your well intentioned responses and concerns.
    I really appreciate it! :)

    I wish more women would be so frank about how size really does matter.

    Since most men are relatively close to average, I think there is some truth in the statement "Size doesn't matter" but that the full, and most accurate statement would be:

    Size doesn't matter . . . unless the guy is really big :) . . . or really small :(

    You have both written so much and I haven't had the time to formulate a sufficient response. But, I think what most needs to be said is:

    Yes. You guys are right. That list of Pros is pretty weak. :oops:

    I would be mortified if a woman saw the size of my bulge or if I got an erection in public, but it was wrong of me to suppose that men who don't have small dicks would feel the same way.

    And, truth is, even though I am small. It does show when I get an erection and often times the bulge does show. It makes me really uncomfortable because it draws attention to something I'd rather women not see and it makes it apparent just how short it really is.
    TiaS likes this.
  14. RiverBlue

    RiverBlue Fapstronaut

    This is good advice for any man. It doesn't just apply to the flaw of a small penis. It's true of any flaw -- real or perceived. But I have to assume that it takes a lot more effort for a guy with a tiny one to have the guts and resolve to overcome his deficiency to nab an exceptional or really any girl.

    I would never shame a little guy. First, that would assume I care enough about other guys dicks to feel I need to shame him. We've all got what we were given and you just have to make the best of it. Second, it just seems cruel. Didn't our moms tell us it's not polite to stare at or point out others' flaws. I agree that any many that needs to make fun of a smaller guy is probably making up for some other, maybe less obvious, deficiency that probably more debilitating than a tiny dick!
    +TenPercent and Vanquisher12 like this.
  15. RiverBlue

    RiverBlue Fapstronaut

    +TenPercent and Hard Mode like this.
  16. Hard Mode

    Hard Mode Fapstronaut

    Bro, I couldn't help smiling at this. I guess there is a solution for everything! LOL!

    I have to say tho, @Vanquisher12, no woman should be called a w***e. Women are our mothers, sisters, daughters and wives. They are our equals and should always be treated with respect. :)
  17. Vanquisher12

    Vanquisher12 Fapstronaut

    Without a doubt I respect most women as equals, and when I have the fortune to find a girl who truly loves me and cares for me, I will honour her as an equal, because she 110% deserves to be treated in that way.

    I just look down upon those women who willingly sleep with other men during a marriage or relationship, just because of trivial superficial issues, without making any effort to talk about what’s wrong with their husband/partner. It’s those women I was referring to (and I also feel the same way about men who are like that too, I don’t discriminate based on gender). Apologies if it sounds harsh, but I just become furious when I see or hear of people who behave like this, because it is degenerate and cruel to anyone they hurt by doing this. I think it’s mainly a combination of my strong conscience element and the vigour and passion of youth.
    Hard Mode likes this.
  18. Hard Mode

    Hard Mode Fapstronaut

    Little Bro, I'm glad to see that you get where we're coming from. And, yes, all this is certainly well-intentioned and with your best in mind.

    Knowing that you suffer from premature ejaculation in addition to being small helps me understand more of your state of mind. It's good you admitted that. Your recovery will be better for it!

    If it's OK, I will continue calling things as I see them in response to your posts. I hope @RiverBlue will do the same. Let's work towards you having a more realistic view of your situation, bro!

    +TenPercent likes this.
  19. BrokenHeart 2

    BrokenHeart 2 Fapstronaut

    I don't think I see any other women on here so I thought I'd come on. I think this subject can very tricky to talk about but it seems that most men on here have remained very respectful of each other or at least tried to say things in the best way possible. I think the author of the original post is genuinely looking for someone to talk to about it. Sometimes we all just need to talk about something and everybody's subject will be different. I came to nofap because I needed that, so I understand where TenPercent is coming from. So it is good to support each other and be there for each other. There can be pros and cons to both sides on the female side. I'm not going to lie right now in the stage I'm in I do find a certain well hung man more arousing than most any man. But that doesn't mean all well hung men are better. To me appearance of a penis is just as important as it's size. So he happens to have maybe one of the most perfect penises I've ever seen. But I wasn't always like that. I'd gone from bigger to smaller and wasn't as impressed by some bigger guys. I think the way you treat a person has a big part to do with it. As a woman that used to like the "nice guy" that would override the size any day. But sometimes the nice guys that are smaller start to treat you like you're not what they want. Like let's say I have a nice shape.. not the biggest ass or breast and I am slim and I'm dating a smaller guy. Then let's say he starts to treat me like I don't have enough ass or breast for him. Then I will start to look at him as inferior to maybe a man more well hung than he is that also finds me beautiful and treats with respect..and I will also not find his penis to be something I want anymore. Now in the beginning I had no problem with this guys size and I had seen bigger but the worse he started to treat me the more I looked at others. But let's say a guy who is well hung treats me bad but you have another guy who is smaller that treats me well. I could make love to him before the bigger guy because a big part of it is how you make that person feel. Most women don't start talking to me about size until a man has hurt them. I can orgasm on a two inch flaacid penis and that's just the facts and I can orgasm on a 10 or 11 inch penis. Some women are probably suffering from delayed ejaculation and don't even know it because that's not something that's talked about. Some men small or large need to realize that all those toys and constant masturbating are not natural or normal for women either. They can suffer from sexual dysfunction just like y'all. It's not always about your size sometimes.. it's what is she doing to herself. Is she watching too much porn etc. I'm. Not all women so I'm sure some just struggle but I'm also sure some have destroyed the felling in thier private parts too. Sometimes it's just how you made the woman feel. Or maybe she's hurt from a past lover. The same man that I loved to have sex with 3 times a night is the same man that can't even get me wet anymore. The root cause wasn't that he wasn't big it's because he treated me like I didn't have enough for him. As the younger people say. It's the double standards for me. Sex is mental. And if you damage it by using porn and masturbating and vibrators your sex life will suffer.. Do I like looking at larger penises now? Yes. But it was because even the smaller men treat you like you don't have enough for them. So sometimes it's just an attitude. No matter what I'm happy with the way I look. I didn't let one man make me think I wasn't a good looking woman. I'm not going to get implants just because he wants a bigger ass or whatever or because his ex got implants and so now he's obsessed with bigger breast. Im happy with my natural self because I know that putting enhancements is not healthy either and no one is perfect. So be happy with you. But continue to talk about it if you need to get it off your chest. That's what we should be here for.
  20. RiverBlue

    RiverBlue Fapstronaut

    First, thanks for giving us the woman's perspective. In the end, so much of this thread has been about how men feel about their dicks as it relates to how women feel about them (the dicks and the men themselves). There's always a counter-theme that women don't care at all. I've never bought that idea, and you post helps put that in perspective.

    This probably doesn't get enough attention from guys obsessed about their size alone. I have to say I am flattered when a woman tells me how much she likes the size of a my penis, but even more so when she tells me how much she likes the way it looks.

    This is also something that probably doesn't get enough attention, although I think some guys on here get it, including @+TenPercent. A big dick alone isn't going to get you everywhere.

    I'm curious by what you mean by "hurt." Do you mean emotionally? I can understand that. Or do you mean, physically because of his large cock? I know I have to be careful with my cock. My experience is, as with so many things, there is a line between pleasure and pain. Up to a certain point the larger size, even if somewhat hard to take, is perceived as enjoyable. Some women, at least, enjoy being fully "stretched." But there is also a point past which the pleasure stops -- where it just feels uncomfortable or painful. I know my penis is large enough to go past that point, if I don't use it thoughtfully and am not aware of the woman's physical response.

    Good for you. That guy sounds like a real ass.

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