So Needs advice from the guys

[A new day]

I’m thinking of approaching my husband for talks on his PA/PIED via writing to him. It seems like a less pressured and awkward way. I’m trying to create safety for us so it’s easier for us to be forthcoming.

What do think about the following? Would you feel safe being approached this way?

“Writing to you about this feels easier. It’s been about a month since we talked about giving up porn. I feel pretty good about things. It would feel good to know how things are going. I feel a little weird bringing it up. It feels taboo to talk about it. It feels hard to let go of trying to do something about it. What do you think?”

 

[Runtilmylegsdropoff]

You can't make someone quit porn. They have to want to quit by their own desire.

 

[A new day]

You can't make someone quit porn. They have to want to quit by their own desire.

Indeed you are right. I intend to influence his desire to quit any way that simultaneously promotes the health of our relationship.

 

[Frank884]

Hmmm. First, why write instead of talk? Second, I would start by discussing the bad effects of porn, how it could be behind the ED etc. maybe share one of the youtube vids?

 

[Frank884]

There is a massive ignorance in society, even in the medical community outside of specialists in psych and urology regarding porn addiction.

 

[A new day]

Hmmm. First, why write instead of talk? Second, I would start by discussing the bad effects of porn, how it could be behind the ED etc. maybe share one of the youtube vids?

I’m writing to give him an opening to talk and do the other stuff you mentioned. He’s been unwilling on all of the above except that he agreed to stop PMO.

 

[Deleted Account]

Indeed you are right. I intend to influence his desire to quit any way that simultaneously promotes the health of our relationship.

This is super simple!
Leave him tomorrow and watch the sparks fly in your romance department!