So next weekend there'll be a stag party

Discussion in 'Problematic Sexual Behavior' started by rockst, Jun 4, 2019.

  1. rockst

    rockst Fapstronaut

    And friends want to invite some escorts to come over at the place we are going to stay. I wonder what I should do...I will be almost 30 days PMO free by that time...I am wondering what to you think having sex in a context like this one will impact my recovering? Will I suffer from chaser effect?
    Deleted Account and need4realchg like this.
  2. ItsYaBoy

    ItsYaBoy Fapstronaut

    it depends on what type of nofap u are doing. if u are doing hardmode, where no porn no masturbation and no orgasm then no. dont go tell them ur busy and cant come or straight up say no. if u are doing standard mode which is no porn or self-masturbation then yes its fine to do, same if u are doing the easy mode. easy mode is just no porn u can masturbate but not think or watch porn.

    if u do decide to go and have sexual activities and orgasm at the end, u will get the chaser effect. i had this a couple of days ago with my girlfriend and it was so hard to not masturbate. but it will go away, mine went away after 2 days and now i dont feel any urge to masturbate
    need4realchg likes this.
  3. ultrafabber

    ultrafabber Fapstronaut

    That's extremely degenerate, you need better friends.
  4. Don't. I'm sure this could replace your old problems with new ones.
  5. TheMaster101

    TheMaster101 Fapstronaut

    Me personally i would just have fun, you are a human being and you have desires, you are going to die one day.. Masturbation on the other hand is not the same thing.. That's something you need to avoid.. Sex is good for you (if done save) go have fun.
    Jackb97 likes this.
  6. Are you trying to insult the OP? Maybe you can try being one here —-instead of insulting him into your warm bond of friendship?

    @rockst can you clarify ... what is the objective of the stag party?
  7. ultrafabber

    ultrafabber Fapstronaut

    I'm not trying to insult op or anyone else, i'm stating my opinion on this kind of "fuckfest" parties. They are degenerate.
    Butterfly1988 and Ethan1982 like this.
  8. Thank you for your opinion.

    Do you talk like this in real life or only online?

    Someone asks you a question and you pop off with your enlightened choice of words: a fuckfest", or insulting the guys friends as degenerate?

    Can you conceive that a person attending a party (stag or not) STILL has a choice on what they do with their body?

    Don't many people go to bachelor parties, where strippers are present--do you assume these are all fuckfests too?

    TO assume "well I'm here, I will fuck" seems to be the response of an animal, or person with only base instinct.

    What if the chicks are not your type?
    What if you just don't want to be alone?
    What if you prefer redheads and there aren't any?
    What if you are going to drink?
    What if you wanna go just to dance?
    What if you're gay?
    What if you go because they are your buds?
    What if you are into the video game aspects?

    Granted your view is quite sour and I think you have the right to give it; but maybe a little more thought to phrasing your ideas?

    Instead of simply running amok pissing on all the threads you find reproachable like an uncontrollable stream of dead red blood cells....
  9. WalkingForward

    WalkingForward Fapstronaut

    Wouldn't you want to be able to truthfully tell your future wife that you have never paid for sex? Is that something you would want to ruin?
  10. ultrafabber

    ultrafabber Fapstronaut

    You're welcome.

    I rarely talk like this in real real life because most people are snowflakes.

    It is literally a "fuckfest", it's hilarious that you're offended i'm calling something exactly what it is - a massive party and orgy with escorts = fuckfest. And yes it is degenerate. Do you want to argue it's not? Go right ahead.

    I don't really care, the decadence of the West is already in full force and i'm tired of people like you playing the devil's advocate on just about anything, even if it's obviously wrong.

    Yes, bachelor parties with strippers are also extremely degenerate, just not as degenerate as escort parties of fuckfests.

    Hope that cleared things up.
  11. Thanks for clearing it up. :) I'm not offended, I just can't see how using a holier-than-thou approach EVER works.

    You are advocating a moral stance--fine; TBH you could advocate a immoral stance, my issue is not with your stance, it's with your attitude and technique.

    (ironically I'm probably more fundamentalist than you, but I don't intend to persuade people through bashing them; I recognize your abrasive technique is not only offensive to people, it simply doesn't work). The current US president has a similar view on how to deal with people he does not agree with--you appear to employing a similar tactic.

    If your goal is to dissuade the OP to attend the party, then insulting him is an mindless but aggressive strategy. Attempting to shame him for having his friends is ALSO a mindless and hostile strategy--and both simply do not work.

    Did you forget you're a porn addict?
    Were you into "uplifting/morally holyPorn"?
    What part of your porn watching was not a result of "the decadence of the west"?

    I am sorry you are tired of "people like me" playing devils' advocate... however contrary to your assumption, I am not advocating orgies, I think they have plenty of powerful advocates already.

    I'm actually trying to say that you as a morality voice--are grossly missing the mark-- solely because you're being incredibly lazy in how you treat your fellow addict. Less insults, more counsel. Respect is how people prefer to be treated.

    Share your views, whatever their origin, simply do so with respect bro.
    Last edited: Jun 6, 2019
    TheMaster101 likes this.
  12. This sure is a hard question to answer. In the past I went to many parties like that,even arranged on with hookers for a retirement party.The guys I worked with were all into this type stuff.There would be a show with 2 or 3 girls then a line for a BJ in the bathroom.
    My wife passed away some years ago and I have to live with the guilt of doing this shit when we were married.
    ledener and need4realchg like this.
  13. ultrafabber

    ultrafabber Fapstronaut


    You fail to understand i am not trying to "shame" op or anyone else. I don't care if op finds it shameful or not. I didn't call op any words, i called his friends degenerates (which they objectively are) and the act of going to a fuckfest degenerate (which it objectively is). I'm saying "fuckfests are degenerate" the same way i'm saying "grass is green". It's just stating a fact, i can't say "grass is green" to shame or insult the grass.

    It is in OP's best interests to find better friends, the same way it's in an alcoholic's best interests to find a group of friends that don't get shitfaced drunk every night.

    I am not a porn addict anymore, i used to be one. Yes, what i did was extremely degenerate and the Western culture (playboy/porn/erotica) definitely started and fueled my addiction. But was I a degenerate? Absolutely.

    I'm not saying you're advocating for orgies, i'm saying you're doing this devil's advocate thing where you're focusing on form rather than content. And assuming things like "i'm trying to shame people".
    Last edited: Jun 6, 2019
  14. I think you should enjoy your time BUT be mindful and use protection and please understand y'all are paying for these women dont hey too crazy
  15. Congrats on no longer being a PA. Seems to me if cured you would be more helpful but you come across anal...

    You mention "the west" a LOT. You from the east side or what up? lol.
    why do you keep saying that--- for what reason?

    Bro, if your objective is to be helpful, persuasive, or even mildly informative, your attitude needs adjusting.

    As a free service to you, I'd like to give you the "TOP 5-Other-ways-Ultrafabber-can-suggest-getting-new-friends".

    #1 Hey man, you might wanna consider some new friends? I think their choice of activity is strongly inadvisable.

    #2 Bro, I know we can't pick our family, but we can pick our friends. I'd suggest reviewing some of these "friends" if it were me!

    #3 Dude, you sure about your friends' idea on this one? Sometimes we make crazy choices--this seems like a easy "no".

    #4 Listen--I'm thinking this party sounds like the worst idea; you might end the night looking at your best friend's balls. No bueno.

    #5 For real man, I think a game of cards, checkers, life, spin the bottle or even twister would be a better plan. Stag party sounds like a lot of fun, if you are a HPV cell looking to get down and dirty for a few hours...

    See, 5 ways to get your point across and NOT insult the OP.

    It's like, you find pleasure in condescension? Were you picked on for being a nerd at some point?

    I've said and repeated this a LOT... I'm here for healing and to help others heal. If your points are made in a way that is designed to do that then great. If not, I'm gonna ask you to restate, rephrase, etc.

    Oh, and form does matter. Consider creative insults get special points for style. Just like a good "yo mama" joke....
  16. risedaily

    risedaily Fapstronaut

    Pls u need to stop this unfruitful arguments. The real issues should be adressed here.
    TheMaster101 and Ethan1982 like this.
  17. It really depends. If you are on hard mode, then you should absolutely not go, since intentional orgasms are not permitted. If you are doing easy or normal mode, then I see no reason to not go. A situation like that is personally not something I would be into, but you have to decide that for yourself. Again, if you are doing hard mode though, definitely don't go.
  18. rockst

    rockst Fapstronaut

    In the end I went to this thing, it was a long weekend.

    We called a couple of escorts over and I had sex with one of them. It was not an orgy. I must say it was not very fun experience for me, much worse than masturbation. I may redo it (not condemning it), just saying that I'd prefer the real thing.

    Well, I guess it is time to update my counter to "No PM" instead of "No PMO".

    No chaser effect until now, for what is worth (I had sex on Friday)
  19. Actually, if you update your counter to "No PM", you are still on track. Orgasms in the course of sex with a partner is completely fine. Why do you say it was not a fun experience?
  20. rockst

    rockst Fapstronaut

    Because you could tell from a 1000 miles the girl was not having fun

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