I have been trying to get rid of this addiction for some years, but only started taking real action at the start of this year. All my relapses/resets in this time have followed the same pattern: First, an urge will pop up in my mind, it can be because of a tweet that randomly pops up, a memory of a P video... that will get me aroused. Then, I would do something that increases this arousal but that can't be considered P or M per se, the most notable is that I used to go on a wikipedia crawl through P, M and sex related articles. I know that I shouldn't have done it all those times,but it was my brain saying that "its not masturbation, just curiosity..." or some shit like that. And finally, I would get so aroused and out of my mind that I would say fuck it, went back on a P site and masturbated as usual, sometimes escalating to weird fetishes that I discovered on those wikipedia crawls. And finally, as we all know it, the regret and going back to day 0. So why am I saying all this? Because today, it happened... almost. I stopped myself right before entering the P site. At that moment, I felt what I had to do, and not what I have programmed my addicted brain to do. I thought "This is the moment. There's no going back if you don't stop right now." What moment is that? The moment you think about after you relapse and tell yourself "Damn, if i could go back in time and not do it... but now it's done and I can't change it." That was the last moment i could've changed it and for my greater good, I did. I am typing this because at that moment it felt like all these months of working are starting to show its earliest fruit. I felt that my brain has really changed, and that even though the path to being cured is long and treacherous, i am happy to know that at least I am walking through it in the correct direction. But I also know that to be fully cured I must stop the second phase in those relapses, because I know that what happened today might not always happen, but I do know that they will eventually disappear if I put all my heart and effort into it. My name is _ and i don't masturbate. My name is _ and i don't watch porn.