Space Marine February - Team Deathmatch (CLOSED)

At the peak of a streak, one can be overwhelmed by confidence. Never let your guard down, a Space Marine would say. I believe that it is more than enough to remember that its is tremendously easy to fall into a downward spiral without any intention to.

 

This seems like a great challenge and I would like to join if at all possible, I pledge myself to the black templars!

 

I would love to hear whats your strategy, when the urges are so strong you cant think clearly and you see all of that nasty stuff wherever you look.
Just want to see your emergency aproach so I am well prepared when it hits me like a truck.

 

I think that everyone's strategies will be kinda unique to them, other than the obvious like getting outside, so I can't promise that any of these things will work for you, but it'll be interesting to hear about other people's methods so I'll start!

I am, for context, avoiding M, so if I look at P then I don't consider it a reset, but I obviously avoid it at all costs because it doesn't feel good and prompts a reset to happen. But if I M at all, irrespective of whether I P or O, that's a reset.

Any time I get urges I try to get out of the house or engross myself in some work. However I've found some more... unusual strategies work as well. My friend was trying to stop smoking and said that when she actively thought about what she was doing it lost its magic - she realised that she didn't like the taste or the experience as a whole. I took that same logic and applied it to PMO. When I'm very close to relapsing I think about what I'm actually doing, instead of focusing on the raw sensation and sex drive, it loses its magic. I think about the people that I want there with me when I feel that way, I think about holding them and... stuff, and it just drives away the desires somehow. I know that this must be completely the wrong technique for a lot of people, but for me it works. As I said, it's a very unique personal method!

 

*Username Changed By Mod Team has joined the Space Wolves*

 

In an attempt to help keep the teams balanced, I will pledge to the Dark Angels. Let's get it. For real this time.

 

The thing is you have to think about that beforehand. That's why I journal so much.
The most important thing is having the truth, the wohloe truth, right there in front of you to counter the lies that want to convince you to PMO.
In you most triggered stste you are not able to think clearly that's why you think about it before.

I also have alist of different (easy!) activities I'll do. It really depend on how severe the ure is e.g. lvl. 1: continue with your day; lvl. 2 listening to some music, go out on the balcony; lvl. 3: going out for a walk, doing some stretches to relieve tention... and a few more. This really comes down to preference but keep it easy so that it doesn't require that much willpower

 

@Sebbrix @T0mCrus4der Thx guys for sharing your strategies!

For me what always worked best was going away to nature and while walking fully focus on my surroundigs. Because sometimes I went out for walk and I played the fantasies in my head knowing nothing can happen when I am outiside, but many times I relapsed the first thing I went back home.

I dont have problem with porn, but I get trigerred quite easily by pictures and then automatically start fantasizing so for me right now I blocked the mobile data for safari so I cant random browse web when I am the most vulnerable, in bed.
The other strategy is to be busy. Everytime I have plenty of time and nothing to do, thats when the thoughts come in, because there is room for it, and want to escape the boredom.

I really like the point of being mindful @T0mCrus4der I red something similar somewhere that when smokers became mindful of the smoking they smoke less and sometimes even quit.
I started to think how it really looks, the fantasies I need to create to reach the self pleasure. Its actually quite disguting.
I will use the strategy when it hits me.

Maybe even the next strategy, which I dont really like much, but I know a lot of fapstronauts use it - playing video games to distract yourself from the urge. I will try the same but with reading.

Also couple days ago red about the negative impact of prone masturbation so finally find strong enough reason to really stay away and see what happens.

This is another huge post, but need to write one more thing I noticed.
When I start slacking off in other areas. F.e. eating like shit, driking, thats the first step of loosing it. Once I loose the discipline in the "normal" things, then I am so much more vulnerable to relapses, even the classic relapse, porn and then m.

 

@ToMMy.H another slightly controversial method that I use is a long term mindset (I stress, this is absolutely not the way to get rid of urges). I found that when I was really strict with myself I usually made it to about 6-8 days every time, then reset, and kept doing this for months on end. By contrast, when I was less strict with myself, resetting every 2-3 days for a while, I eventually got a surge of motivation and managed to break past the 7 day wall, which almost always led to a much longer streak. I'll put some numbers below for reference.

Basically the logic behind it is based on what happens to a man's body when he does nofap (sorry ladies, no idea whether this is true for y'all) - testosterone levels remain constant for the first week, then on day 7 (approx) they spike by about 50%. When looking at my streaks during stricter times it seems like I was hitting the spike and it was pushing me over the edge every time without fail because I was stuck in a rut. However, when I allowed the motivation to build up, I was often able to survive the spike and let myself get used to the new levels of T.

Some numbers for reference;
When being strict, my streak lengths were (representative example);
6, 6, 7, 6, 5, 2, 9, 8, 6, 4, 10, 7
When being less strict and riding waves of motivation my streak lengths were;
2, 1, 2, 2, 4, 3, 30, 2, 3, 21, 4, 1, 0, 2, 20(current streak)

So you can see that I would likely never break free from the habit entirely when being super strict with myself, but when exploiting the motivational ebb and flow I was able to do much longer streaks which are pushing my recovery journey so much further than the medium length streaks.

THIS STRATEGY MIGHT NOT WORK FOR EVERYONE!! I have a lot to motivate me at the moment and people in different circumstances may very well experience different mileage from this. But if anyone is struggling to reach the longer streaks, consider taking a breather and rekindling your motivation (not just the post-nut motivation, actual genuine motivation), it might just lead you to longer streaks

 

Yeah these distraction strategies might help you in the moment, might even get you one week to a month clean.
The core issue is not the triggering and craving itself, and what you do to get rid of it. (I recently posted something about sexual transmutation also. There are way better strategies to deal with urges/concepts on top.)
Mindfulness also only gets you so far. If you really want to dig deeper, you got to think about identity. What's your place in the universe, what's meaning, What's fulfillment. Who are you and where is you identity routed, when the storms of fate are coming

 

@Sebbrix I red that people truly change their beviour only when they reach the point of total low - some well known psychologist said that. I also had my biggest streaks after very long period of 1-2-3days relapses, but its for nothing when you cant continue in abstaining after reaching the big streak. You basically delete the progress you have reached.
So thats my goal, always trying to top my latest streak and actually dont view it as streaks so I avoid the mindset of rewarding myself when I reach long streak.

@T0mCrus4der 100%. Where is your blog? Cant find it and would love to take a look.

I bumped into good youtube channel. Somebody in forum told me to check it out and I find it very helpful. This is the link on vid I am currently watching.

I really like the point about masturbation and using your fantasy.

This will be my another emergency strategy. Trying to really hammer it down, that my new and deeply wished identity is not fapping to porn or fantasies.

Today feeling slight tension down there. I watched MMA tournament and there were some good looking ring girls. I tried to look away as much as possible, because I know how it always start.

 

Sign me up for Black Templars in the February Challenge.

 

I'll go with the Dark Angels.

I'd like to say it was to even numbers out, but the furries line got me.

I've been struggling with PM and hope to get going again in February.

 

I don't have a blog. Was here in the forum.
I'd recommend you check the whole sexual self mastery series and enter the omnigame playlist of this dude.

I even purchased his reforged man course (if you are interested as well I would sign up for the newsletter and then wait for a discount. I think valentines day might be one coming up)

 

As usual I'll join Black Templars , This time I'll battle till the End. @EndPornLiveLife
Hardmode On.

 

Check-in ! for BLOOD ANGELS. I think that I should not come to deathwatch this months. Because for Me is month is gonna be rough it's not like that I am not able to endure that but I don't wanna take any risk and also I need to get more strength to go in that so I need February. I have to find my way, my path, and my true self on which I will be truly satisfied.
TAKE ME IN BLOOD ANGELS.

 

Reporting for duty with the Space Wolves! @EndPornLiveLife

 

The countdown has begun,
I wish everyone a successfull month.

Good luck and stay strong!