Starting again

Discussion in 'Rebooting in a Relationship' started by Acky31, Jan 14, 2021.

  1. Acky31

    Acky31 Fapstronaut

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    Yesterday was really busy and today has been busy too but not quite as bad. It doesn't help that what once took 5 mins now takes 30 mins meaning when it's busy, it seems even busier. This 4 day week feels longer than a 5 day week, and I'm ready for the weekend. Hopefully there will be nothing more stressful this afternoon and I'll be happy going home!
     
  2. Acky31

    Acky31 Fapstronaut

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    This weekend has been decent, but tiring as the little one hasn't been sleeping well recently on a night, so we're pretty tired again as usual. On Saturday we didn't even get dressed. I never have PJ days, it makes me feel like a slob, and like I'm wasting the day, but I couldn't be bothered on Saturday, so we didn't do very much.

    Yesterday was just a normal Sunday with the standard awful grocery shopping experience (I quite dislike shopping, especially the pressure of packing bags at the end of the shop when there is a queue watching, waiting and judging your packing ability... )

    Today has been okay. Its been fairly busy, and there has been quite a bit to do, but it's not been too stressful.

    What I feel like we need is a good relaxing family holiday that has been sorely missed the past couple of years. Last year we should have been abroad twice for different things, and we ended up being locked down instead, so I hope that we will be able to get away this summer!
     
  3. Acky31

    Acky31 Fapstronaut

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    It's a gorgeous day today, nice and warm spring day. This morning I had to scrape ice off the car though, so it's hard to decide how many layers to wear. But I'm currently enjoying a coffee, sat in my car, listening to music with the windows down, soaking in some vitamin D.

    This weekend we will be doing some work in the garden. The first day this year where we will have done any real garden work, and it's to fix a nearly broken fence. I think we will hopefully get chance to do more than the fence (which also is in desperate need of a coat of paint) and get some other gardening done. I look forward to being able to do a bit more shopping for those things with the family. Recently the only shopping I've done has been a lonely weekly grocery shop which I actually kind of hate... Roll on a lockdown "free" summer!
     
  4. Acky31

    Acky31 Fapstronaut

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    Today is a busy day, but going okay. Better than yesterday, as I was really tired and lethargic, I could really motivate myself to do anything... This morning though, I listened to a porn free radio podcast about changing your state. One of the things it discussed was the idea that you feel how you think and how you can think your way to feeling different. Essentially thinking positive thoughts, looking for something good instead of focusing on the bad can help you change the way you feel, so its something I have tried to practice this morning, and I think it's helpful, I certainly feel better than I did this time yesterday.

    Still looking forward to home time though but the weather while I'm sat out with my lunch is helping my mood too!
     
  5. Acky31

    Acky31 Fapstronaut

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    So, had a strange end to the week. Tuesday afternoon I found out that one of my colleagues passed away, she was only 28, but she had several health problems and was having heart surgery, which she had had before, but she didn't make it through this time, after a 15 hour operation. That hit me harder than I expected and the moral in the lab was notably shaken. The day after was pretty quiet in our usually loud and enthusiastic department.

    Despite the news, work still went on, and was still busy. There is no relenting, even during hard times.

    Thursday and Friday I was studying from home in an online course with other healthcare scientists for leader and education training, which was very good and emphasised a lot of tools and ideas that were very relevant to work and to addiction. Tan walked in at one point and thought I was listening to a recovery podcast.

    The weekend went better and we enjoyed some sunshine while I helped my father in law install a new ceiling to his conservatory, and we had food and a drink with them before heading home. Yesterday was a regular Sunday with grocery shopping, tidying and Sunday lunch and visiting my dad and brother with the kids.

    Today is back to the grind, with a busy day ahead, and some training ahead for the rest of the week with a new member of staff to the department, hopefully putting some new tools to good use.
     
  6. Acky31

    Acky31 Fapstronaut

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    This week has been really busy,and has flown over. I've been training a new person in my section and they have been a godsend really, as they have picked things up well so have been able to help quite a bit with some of the tasks. Got a lot to do before the 3 day bankholiday weekend starts though.

    The lab feels a bit better after the terrible news last week that one of our colleagues passed away, and we have decided to raise money for a memorial garden for colleagues working at the hospital, where we will plant trees and have benches etc in memorandum.

    I am however looking forward to this weekend, even if the weather is forecast to be sub par...
     
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  7. Acky31

    Acky31 Fapstronaut

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    This weekend has been good. The girls slept at their grandparents on Saturday leaving us only the little man to look after overnight. It didn't feel like a rest, but it did make it easier. Back to work today after the Bank Holiday (which was, as expected, dreary and cold weather wise) and it feels like I have not had a rest, I'm knackered again. Weekends never seem long enough to recover, even the long ones...

    Today is going okay though, and although this morning has been a bit stop start, we have been productive and managed to get the bench clear before lunch, though it will likely be filled again after we return. I have other work to do this afternoon which has a deadline of today.

    This weekend we had a phone switch, and I've moved on to a new phone, selling the old, which can be a stressful time. Annoyingly we didn't get all the accountability apps etc set up before I started work today. It will have to be a priority tonight though, for Tans peace of mind. I have not had any issues with an unlocked phone today though.
     
  8. Acky31

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    This weekend has been mostly spent inside due to the rain, but the occasion the sun was out, the girls raced out to play in the garden. When the sun is out its nice, but it has been pelting down today again too. The sun is out one minute, and it's raining the next. Can't plan anything by it.

    I'm busy today sorting meetings and audits, and will be back to working in a section of the lab I haven't done in 18months or more on Tues and Weds which will be interesting getting back on the horse. Kind of looking forward to it, but it's quite a stressful and pressurised section to be on so hopefully I pick it back up quickly...
     
  9. Acky31

    Acky31 Fapstronaut

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    This week has been busy, and I've been working on a section that I haven't worked on for roughly 2 years, which has put a bit of pressure on me. I'm not sure the expectation was there that I would be up to full speed straight away but I probably put the pressure on myself to perform like I usually do.

    I've completely caught up to date with porn free radio podcast so I'm going back to listen to the betrayed the addicted and the expert now. It was interesting listening through the episodes as we came into the covid pandemic as it showed some great tips dealing with the uncertainty and stress. We are hopefully nearing the end of the worst of it now though, but the tools are never the less still useful.
     
  10. Acky31

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    Sleep is probably getting worse recently. The little man is spending less and less time in his own bed it feels, despite persevering. He is definitely struggling with separation anxiety and is most pronounced at 11pm to 1am at which point we feel like we have no option but to get him out of his bed and into ours where he does eventually settle with periodical periods of being unsettled. We haven't had a night for quite a while where we could get some good sleep, and it really gets to you. It hasn't impacted sobriety or recovery, but it does affect the mood and will to actually do anything that requires any effort. Hopefully this will just pass like a phase, but I have heard some horror stories...
     
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  11. Acky31

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    I realise it's a while since my last post on this thread. I've not had any issues, but Tan starts work again today so I feel like I need to renew efforts to help her feel more comfortable being back, especially when late shifts start again. That renewal includes writing here regularly again.

    The past couple of weeks has been particularly tiring. Our little one still is not sleeping particularly well. We had two not too bad nights followed by last night where he slept barely at all, leaving us with about 4 or 5 hours of broken sleep at best. Not great for Tans start back at work today. So I'm pretty tired today.

    The weekend was excellent though. We had our first child free nights for quite a while, though we wasted the sleep on drinking to celebrate our friends wedding. The wedding was great though as it was our first chance to go out and socialise with friends since the start of the covid pandemic at the start of 2020, so about 16 months, and we had a great time, but back to work with a bump and no sleep. Tan and I are doing okay though, hopefully her shift treats her well!
     
  12. Acky31

    Acky31 Fapstronaut

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    The last couple of days have gone okay. Tans first day back went well, and she wasn't thrown in at the deep end.

    Work has been a little stressful lately though, and I think part of it is a slight opening up of the rift between lab staff and consultant. The kind of theme that consultants needs are more important than the need of the lab staff. This all stems from moving a microscope...

    Although this has only been a 3 day week, it feels like it's been longer, and I'm already glad of a weekend break!
     
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  13. Acky31

    Acky31 Fapstronaut

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    The weekend was definitely welcome, and the little one seemed to be sleeping a little better too, but no sooner had this thought crossed my mind he had a terrible night last night. Up several times and then up up from 4.30, safe to say its left us knackered today.

    Work has been a pain, slightly escalated from my post on Friday, as when I returned and checked what has happened with the microscope situation, all of my work in the office had been put in a box so the desk could be replaced and the microscope placed back on a desk that is too big for the room. I have now spent the entire morning re organising all of the work that had essentially been dumped. Annoyed is an understatement. That means I've got much less time to get a load of work done by the deadline of the end of the day...
    Wish me luck...
     
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  14. Acky31

    Acky31 Fapstronaut

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    Work has been a bit better the past couple of days, and sleep was pretty good last night, though the yesterday morning we were up from 4.20am.
    Tan has been back to work properly this week, but she feels like she has been taken advantage of a little as yesterday she had so many patient visits that were in different places that she missed one of them. That lead to her being in a pretty bad mood last night, and the kids were not helping matters as they were fighting and screaming until bed time. As I said though, the little one slept better last night, not waking until 5.10am with only one wakeup for a feed. Fingers crossed for more of those!
     
  15. Acky31

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    This past few days should have been good. It was my birthday on Saturday, however after our youngest daughter had a bump on her head on Friday night, there has been nothing but trouble, tears and vomiting.
    She woke up in the middle of the nigh, after she banged her head, throwing up. This was obviously very concerning, so Tan took her through to A&E, where (after a 3 hour wait, at 4am...) she was eventually seen and sent for a ct scan. It came back all clear fortunately, but none of us got an awful lot of sleep that night.
    On Saturday she was still being sick, but it got better as the day went on, and on Sunday she was doing a bit better, just very lethargic and tired. Then our youngest started vomiting, then Sunday night I developed Diarrhoea, and last night our eldest started vomiting. That leaves only one person who hasn't been affected by this bug: Tan.

    So, all in all I'm sick of this week, it's been crap!

    Today is Tans first late shift after going back to work. Needless to say, she has been on edge about it, but I think she has kept it back admirably. I have had no problems though, and to be honest, I'd be happy to just sleep, as that has been significantly lacking recently. In the plus side, Tans parents have agreed to have the kids overnight this weekend coming meaning we may actually get to sleep finally!
     
  16. Acky31

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    So, everyone in the house has had D, V or a combination, except Tan. But it now looks like it is starting on Tan too. Its definitely been a difficult week so far, and Tan will have to be off tomorrow as well.

    We will be having a couple of nights child free this weekend too, so I hope that Tan can still enjoy it to an extent.

    Works not too bad today, other than being really tired. Spent quite a while last night working out what covid tests we need to do for travelling to Spain in August. Turns out that, because my brother is not double vaccinated yet, it will cost over £800 for all of the tests for everyone,and our 6 year old will have to have one on our return too. An lovely little surprise cost to this somewhat delayed holiday. And we have it all to sort out in 2 weeks. Nice and straight forward it is not. Stress inducing it most certainly is. I just hope that the holiday is worth all of this difficulty...
     
  17. Acky31

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    Yesterday went really well. I observed two operations in the theatres at work, and it was incredibly interesting. It helps to complete the picture to an extent, as in the lab you completely detach from the fact that the samples you are dealing with are actually from a person, so it was a great experience for that.

    The other night was Tans first late shift. It went okay, but the kids were not easy. It's the first time I've done the bedtime routine completely on my own with 3 kids so it was difficult as the little one would not go to sleep, and the girls ended up going to sleep in our bed waiting for me to read them a story... All in all though, it went well. This weekend, Tan is working again, so I'll have the kids to contend with on Saturday and Sunday.
     
  18. Acky31

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    This week has been our first week back home from being on holiday. It had been stressful, but also really good, though we need some more time off to relax now! Travelling in these times has been strange and challenging. The extra paperwork needed, extra planning, extra time spent checking in and extra money spent on tests, but it was all worth it. I was pretty anxious before travelling, but it wasn't as bad as I had built it up to be and I'm glad we went.
    We had an apartment with an amazing view over the beach and out to sea, right next to some amazing restaurants, and we did an awful lot of walking all over the place, in the beautiful sunshine (though sometimes too hot...)

    Yesterday saw us back to work with a bump, and Tans first shift back, was a late shift. Tan had a very stressful end to the shift, and I had struggles when it came to getting our middle child to bed. I did not do as much as I intended doing when I got downstairs, including writing a post for here, and sorting things out with suitcases etc. I also triggered Tan by locking the front door when I got in. I don't remember doing it as I was pretty stressed when I got in after dealing with shouting screaming and tantrums, but I need to work on being more aware and present.

    I do need to start putting more effort into my daily tasks though, so I will start with this intention that I intend to keep up.

    For now though, I look forward to the next holiday!
     
  19. Acky31

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    This weekend went okay. Tan worked both Saturday and Sunday which wasn't great, but we had a nice BBQ on Saturday which was great, and the weather held out nicely, Tan showed up after her shift too so didn't totally miss out. Yesterday brought rain, but we went for Sunday lunch and met up with Tan at my dad's house after.

    I found yesterday that I had left a single shopping bag in the boot of my car from the day before. Typically it was the one bag that had prawns and fish in, so my car was not too pleasant to drive in yesterday after the fish had 24 hours of warm incubation...

    Today back at work. Its not going too bad at the moment. I've got a load of work finished, and will be doing some microscope work this afternoon. Hopefully I can get plenty done.
     
  20. Acky31

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    This week is going quite well, work has been okay, today hasn't been bad at all so far. Even had time to do some microscopy work, fingers crossed I get more opportunity later.

    We are planning a christening for our little man at the moment, which is something to look forward to. A big catch up with friends and family we haven't seen for probably the best part of 2 years, or longer in some cases. There will sadly be people who we won't see there, that we would have loved to be there, and it will be tough, but I am really looking forward to it still.
     

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