melodysechochamber
Fapstronaut
I found out two days ago that my boyfriend of over a year is addicted to porn and has been in the throes of his addiction for two years, and has been watching porn since the age of 13 (he is 19 and so am I). Here is the content of the thread I posted when I first found out:
"I found out that my boyfriend of a year is addicted to porn. I was on his laptop and found that he had been looking at pictures of naked girls and amateur porn despite telling me numerous times that he doesn't watch porn and doesn't feel the need to because I send him pictures often (we are in an ldr most of the time) and finding this out completely devastated me. I confronted him and he told me that he has been addicted to porn for 2 years. He broke down and cried and told me that I was the only person he wants but I feel cheated and betrayed considering he lied to me for our entire relationship telling me he doesn't watch porn. He has tried to cut down on the amount of times he has done it but has done it in the past week which leads me to believe he will do it again. He has told me he is going to go to meetings for other porn addicts but I can't help but think he will lie to me again about this. If he does I will end our relationship because I have been lied to and cheated on in the past and I don't deserve this."
In the past two days I have found out more about the extent of his addiction. He has not told anybody about it apart from me because I found everything. He watches solo porn mostly and also live cam shows which to me is worse than regular porn because I feel like he's masturbating to girls who could be normal people like me and that makes me feel cheated on. He has said he doesn't watch regular porn because it's too 'violent' but I don't believe him. I just think he prefers watching girls get themselves off. He also uses nude photos of me that I have sent him during our LDR in conjunction with porn which makes me also feel disgusting and put in the same category as porn stars. He has denied that any of this is true but I still feel this way.
I will be making a list of boundaries that I want him to know about so our relationship can mend. At this point we have had sex since me finding out about his PA but I kind of regret it because I don't want him to think that he can just use me instead of porn for completion. In the future I want to see his web history from the day before we have sex or do anything sexual in nature as he would not deserve sex if I found out he had viewed any inappropriate content. I have installed the K9 web protection on his computer and blocked all the porn sites he uses and also all porn in general as well as adult content.
He seems very committed to me that he wants to stop this as he thinks its disgusting and shameful and he wants to stay with me and fix our relationship. I feel as though it has been damaged very badly but if he can make an effort to successfully beat his PA by going to meetings, abstaining from masturbation completely for 90 days and being honest about his addiction then I feel like we can more forwards. Otherwise it will be over as I don't want to be with someone who has a PA and can't fix it.
Massive entry for my first post but I needed to get so much stuff off my chest. I am the only one who knows and I feel so alone.
"I found out that my boyfriend of a year is addicted to porn. I was on his laptop and found that he had been looking at pictures of naked girls and amateur porn despite telling me numerous times that he doesn't watch porn and doesn't feel the need to because I send him pictures often (we are in an ldr most of the time) and finding this out completely devastated me. I confronted him and he told me that he has been addicted to porn for 2 years. He broke down and cried and told me that I was the only person he wants but I feel cheated and betrayed considering he lied to me for our entire relationship telling me he doesn't watch porn. He has tried to cut down on the amount of times he has done it but has done it in the past week which leads me to believe he will do it again. He has told me he is going to go to meetings for other porn addicts but I can't help but think he will lie to me again about this. If he does I will end our relationship because I have been lied to and cheated on in the past and I don't deserve this."
In the past two days I have found out more about the extent of his addiction. He has not told anybody about it apart from me because I found everything. He watches solo porn mostly and also live cam shows which to me is worse than regular porn because I feel like he's masturbating to girls who could be normal people like me and that makes me feel cheated on. He has said he doesn't watch regular porn because it's too 'violent' but I don't believe him. I just think he prefers watching girls get themselves off. He also uses nude photos of me that I have sent him during our LDR in conjunction with porn which makes me also feel disgusting and put in the same category as porn stars. He has denied that any of this is true but I still feel this way.
I will be making a list of boundaries that I want him to know about so our relationship can mend. At this point we have had sex since me finding out about his PA but I kind of regret it because I don't want him to think that he can just use me instead of porn for completion. In the future I want to see his web history from the day before we have sex or do anything sexual in nature as he would not deserve sex if I found out he had viewed any inappropriate content. I have installed the K9 web protection on his computer and blocked all the porn sites he uses and also all porn in general as well as adult content.
He seems very committed to me that he wants to stop this as he thinks its disgusting and shameful and he wants to stay with me and fix our relationship. I feel as though it has been damaged very badly but if he can make an effort to successfully beat his PA by going to meetings, abstaining from masturbation completely for 90 days and being honest about his addiction then I feel like we can more forwards. Otherwise it will be over as I don't want to be with someone who has a PA and can't fix it.
Massive entry for my first post but I needed to get so much stuff off my chest. I am the only one who knows and I feel so alone.