Starting new streak today *eproctophile* - looking for accountability partner

Hi everyone,

My first post on here for around 18 months i think. I've been *trying* to give up porn, masturbation, orgasm recently for over a year, everything's been understandably loads harder since extreme lockdown restrictions were imposed in my home country (UK). Opportunities to date or even meet girls are much restricted, leading to long periods of certainty that there is no chance of getting any sex. This is a big disincentive to doing nofap for me, as I am primarily motivated by having sex and being intimate with girls. PIED is possibly still an issue for me - see below for more detail.

I'm trying to see the lockdown period instead as an opportunity to rebuild my masculine desires and grow the self-discipline to resist my sexual urges, instead hopefully having the opportunity for real sexual interaction with a woman after covid restrictions finally end.

I'll try and be brief on my history of nofap. My situation is related to a fetish (eproctophilia) you can look it up - which involves most of my pornography/masturbatory habits. I've had this fetish for as long as I can remember, but I only started masturbating properly a lot when I was about 16-17. I didn't think it was a major problem since I was only masturbating once every 2 days on average I would say which doesn't seem to be an addiction.

Over the years I became more frustrated at my lack of sexual partners and began to suspect my desires and masturbation were keeping me from really going out there and seeking *the pussy*. In early 2019 I visited a prostitute and realised I am probably suffering PIED (it's hard to say, because a lack of attraction, nerves about the whole situation and the lack of real intimacy of it may well have contributed too). I was worried it was beacuse of my fetish and teaching my brain to only be fully aroused by what I was looking at online. I began to read more about nofap and tried a couple of shorter streaks.

In May 2019 I became really interested in a girl romantically and managed to begin a longer streak until August 2019 (about 110 days altogether). This was a great time of personal growth, confidence and success at work for me which I think helped spur me on - in turn nofap definitely generated more confidnecne in myself regarding my own self-discipline, so a positive feedback loop. I don't think I'm a weak or undisciplined person - I can be very focussed with work, studies and exercise for example, but I really seem to struggle with staying motivated and disciplined with nofap.

The end of my romantic interest (another person got there first, haha) coincided with me breaking my streak, *to see if I still coom*. SInce around Aug 2019 I feel I've been masturbating more than ever, probably most days, I did manage a nearly three week streak in Aug 2020 as I was on holiday though.

I believe I am suffering a number of issues which would mean even if an opportunity to get intimate with a girl became available now or immediately after covid restrictions end, I would have difficulty.
1. Fetish - I am still very attracted to girls in general but think this may contribute to PIED.
2. Performance Anxiety - relating to lack of experience and probably resulting ffrom worries that the other issues will cause me to have PIED!
3. Death grip - I don't think masturbating once every couple of days is the issue, but my style of masturbating for years was to do so without retracting the foreskin.
From October I began trying with lube and a fully retracted foreskin and a reduced speed/softer grip, I actually find I can last a lot longer but I seem to suffer some loss of sensitivity. I'm basically triyng to emulate the experience of vaginal sex as much as possible.

My plans are:
1. Stop looking at eproc porn altogether mainly on YouTube.
2. Stop looking at any other pornography on PornHub etc
3. Avoid edging or masturbating at all for this first "cold turkey" period. AVoid touching during the day when I have sexual urges - I will aim to do press-ups/burpees or something else instead.
- Make sure I keep my downstairs as clean as possible through an improved cleaning routine, better maintenance of pubes etc.

This is to support my goals, which are:
1. To cure or significantly reduce likelihood of PIED, if I have it, so I can have a fully rewarding sexual experience with a woman.
2. To improve sensitivity in my glans and ensure I can enjoy sex with fully retracted foreskin
3. I have accepted that I may well have my fetish for life, but if I at least don't indulge or stimulate it any more, it may decrease its grip on my brain and the delta fos B / neural pathways that have built in. Again, this might reduce the chance that I experience PIED if I am more aroused by sex itself with a woman.

It's gonna be hard to stick to all these things throughout yet another lockdown as I've already found since March! (I used to not WFH but since changing jobs I do now). I'm looking for an accountability partner whom we can talk to each other on here, post updates and maybe even do the odd call catch-up for mutual motivation.

Peace, and I wish good luck to all men starting on this challenge.