Starting over again (for the 1000th time)

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Highlander, Feb 18, 2015.

  1. Highlander

    Highlander Fapstronaut

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    I have been trying to quit porn for some years now. I am 20 and started fapping when I was 11.
    I still can remember the first time I saw porn. It was in a second hand cellphone my father gave me. I was 15 I think, and I consider myself an addicted since then.
    I joined nofap 6 months ago, I have been trying a lot of things to get rid of this plague in my life, but no success. In the past few months, I think the longest streak i had without porn was 10 days. I feel miserable because I know that PM is destroying me. I am a religious guy, so I was supposed to hate it, I do hate, but I cant quit, and this is killing me.
    I set some goals for 2015, I reckon is hard to stick to them, but I'm still struggling. But the main goal for my year is QUIT PMO. I set that my life should spin around it, because I see that porn and masturbation is the main reason for my depressive and miserable life.
    As I say in the title I am starting over again for the 1000th time. I feel very frustrated because I do know that my life will be way better if I quit porn, but I turn into someone else when the urges come. I procrastinate a lot, i dont have a girlfriend, and I have a very very poor selfesteem.
    Sorry for my vague writing, I'm too mentally overwhelmed to think in a second language.
     
  2. ilovetyrannosaurusrex

    ilovetyrannosaurusrex Fapstronaut

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    I am religious to and hate porn but I keep finding myself going back to it. I hate it but can't get away from it. I started when I was 13 and now 16 I am trying to quit. I started to realize how bad porn was when I turned 14 and I just cant seem to shack it off. I feel the same way as you Highlander. I wish you luck and just try to think of why you are trying to quit, it may give you some extra motivation.
     
  3. jatar

    jatar Fapstronaut

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    You're not alone in this! In fact, today is exactly 6 months since I've started NoFap (I wasn't on the forum at first) and as you can see I'm on day 1 for bazilionth time. My best streak is 18 days, so nothing crazy. I'm in the same boat as you.

    Don't get discouraged. You know you've made the right decision to quit. Stick with it and patiently work towards your goal. In particular, don't get discouraged by failures, they're a natural part of the process for guys like us, but make sure that you learn from each one of them and create your own ways for dealing with urges. Don't be too hard on yourself because negative emotions and disappointment can lead you back to porn.

    Remember, like all good things that are worth doing will improve your life, this will take time and effort to accomplish, but, to paraphrase JFK, we choose to do this not because it's easy, but because it's hard.

    I believe in you, stay strong!
     
  4. Rectify

    Rectify Fapstronaut

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    What you think, shall come to pass

    I feel your pain Highlander, as many reading this do too.

    I have also tried to quit entirely, dozens if not hundreds of times.

    The longest time clean I had was around 5 years, from 19 to 24. It has been an absolute battle from 25 to 28. The longest I went without edging or PMO during this time was about a year.

    I'm at my wits end, and oh so weary from this addiction, more like bad habit, however I still have yet to escape it.

    I need to focus 100% on building new habits and a new attitude towards success, focusing on old ways and simply avoiding PMO is often not enough.

    It's because of my lack of self-discipline and my tendency to let my emotional mind influence my thoughts and actions that I have been unable to finally transcend this life-destroying, vitality draining vice.

    I feel the hellfire and energy drain from this last relapse, it is so pitiful and painful.

    Let us focus on finding the light in our lives, and committing to success in all affairs.
     
  5. NotSoVain

    NotSoVain Fapstronaut

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    I'm in the same boat as you. I'm in eight hours, relapsed after ten days, I felt like total crap at first, but I'm quitting now, no more playing around BS that I've been doing.

    I HIGHLY recommend you read this post, it literally saved me from likely constant relapse for a long time. > http://www.rebootnation.org/forum/index.php?topic=1256.0 <
     
  6. Rectify

    Rectify Fapstronaut

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    Great post, thanks for that link NotSoVain.
     
  7. Highlander

    Highlander Fapstronaut

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    wonderful post dude, gave me a lot of inspiration
     
  8. Highlander

    Highlander Fapstronaut

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    wish you luck too mate, we are together on this battle
     
  9. BlackVelvet

    BlackVelvet Fapstronaut

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    I feel your pain Highlander. Don't be so hard on yourself though. I've relapsed many times on this journey, we all have, but we get up and keep fighting. We are like little babies first learning how to walk on our own, at first we may stumble maybe once maybe ten times but eventually, we will walk! Do your best.
    Au revoir,
    Ace
     
  10. Highlander

    Highlander Fapstronaut

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    It makes me feel a lot better to remember that there is a lot of people fighting the same war as I.
    thnk you very much
     
  11. IBHussaini

    IBHussaini Fapstronaut

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    Before I know what nofap is, I actually despise fapping, my best in the past without knowing anything about the addiction were 30, and 32 days of no pmo, but now since I found nofap I'm at my all time highest streak 82 days. Going for 90.
     
  12. IBHussaini

    IBHussaini Fapstronaut

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    Before I know what nofap is, I actually despise fapping, my best in the past without knowing anything about the addiction were 30, and 32 days of no pmo, but now since I found nofap I'm at my all time highest streak 82 days. Going for 90.
     

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