Stop being too nice?

You have made a first step of realization.
Read 'No more Mr. Nice guy'.
Do things you really want (the hardest part is to find out and not to be afraid of others opinion), in order to build up your self esteem and enjoy life.
Get educated about men-women relationship (your experience and continue to 'interact' with women, Rich Cooper YouTube channel etc.).

 

Why is it wrong to be so nice? Shouldn't you just be your authentic self, instead of trying to be something you're not. And maybe your partners just didn't feel they were deserving of someone so kind. Maybe the problem lies with them? It does happen...

 

I would suggest you the book: "No More Mr. Nice Guy". It will help you.

 

I've been in your shoes, and way I made it out is by simply not filling other people expectations anymore, let their made up expectations for themselves, also the word no can really transform your life, it should be part of your vocabulary. The book "the art of saying no" will definitely help you in this case.

 

don't stop being nice!! haha a lot of guys like to be mean and it is annoying af. but sadly chicks like it i don't know why i think it is a natural reaction for them to use their estragen to tame a angry/mean man. it's sick satisafaction but i know that most females just want a dude that is loyal, confident and successful so they could have their babies haha

 

It’s good that you can see what you are doing and that it isn’t working. Get assertive about what you want in your life. The more you understand how men and women work, the less you will think in terms of nice and mean.

 

dysfunctional people are interesting(at first) when you don't know them very well but guys are also attracted to "crazy" woman(or bad girls).

 

Most attempts at relationships will not work. That’s why I learned to truly be myself which is not people pleasing. Just me. If things don’t work out, you still have your dignity.

 

Analyze the why behind your "niceness." Are you afraid of confrontation?

 

The only way I've found working for me: Be fair and just to both parties: Treat yourself as you would treat the other person. If you force yourself to accommodate the other's needs just to be likeable and not be rejected by them, you are being unfair to yourself. Try to see yourself as somebody else and make a decision on how that somebody else should act based on your evaluation of the situation and not on fearing that if you act in a certain way you would become unlikeable and/or get rejected. So... it's not a matter of stop being too nice (the world needs nice people), it's a matter of being fair to everybody, including yourself.