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STOP VICTIMIZING YOURSELF

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by Megasameru, Jan 9, 2018.

  1. Jan 9, 2018 #1
    Megasameru

    Megasameru Fapstronaut

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    This is part of a post I made wich is basically a "How to improve your life" tutorial. You can read it in my bio. Im probably gonna post it in parts here, and I think this specific one is really important for starters.


    • Stop victimizing yourself
    To stop considering yourself a victim doesnt mean throw all of the guilt on you. It means making you responsible of the things you can change, and making aware that you can change yourself because in fact you can. Saying "I can't do it because I was taught that way" may be true, but that doesn't make it less of an excuse. The solution is often explicit in the excuse: "You were taught that way? Teach yourself the other way". Also, believe it or not, affirmations have an enormous potential to change things. Saying "I can't" will make you believe it. Say the things you want to be instead, say "I can change and I will change", because you can and you will. Excuses may be true, but they are worthless because no matter what position you are in, you are always capable of getting better. Everytime you're about to say an excuse to yourself or anyone else, think of this three things:
    1. Is this fact completely true? Try and explain it detailed with no emotions attached.

    2. If it's true, is this fact actually stopping me from fulfiling my purpose?

    3. If it does, what can I do to change this fact?
     
    Megasameru, Jan 9, 2018
    Megasameru, Jan 9, 2018
    #1
    sectumsempra, Roady and Knighthawk like this.
  2. Jan 9, 2018 #2
    elevate

    elevate Fapstronaut

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    For a lot of people staying a helpless victim is much easier than letting go of that identity and put effort into changing. Both are painful, but at least they're familiar with staying a victim.

    It takes courage to change and eventually be competent at something. Continuous competency leads to confidence, but you need that courage to begin. You require it to go through the process of failures and rejections necessary to become competent.

    The longer you neglect something you're afraid of, the bigger the courage it will take to begin.
     
    elevate, Jan 9, 2018
    elevate, Jan 9, 2018
    #2
    sectumsempra and Megasameru like this.
  3. Jan 10, 2018 #3
    kirlu72

    kirlu72 Fapstronaut

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    I am not victim of porn but of my behaviour with porn.
    I am thus victim of myself.
    It would be easier to say that I am victim of porn but it is impossible to fight against as porn will always exist.
    I can on the other hand fight against my behaviour, change it to become a better and happier person.
    It is for me a real motivation to plan to become better and thus certainly happier than to stay a victim (of myself).
     
    kirlu72, Jan 10, 2018
    kirlu72, Jan 10, 2018
    #3
    Megasameru likes this.
  4. Jan 10, 2018 #4
    vinilzord2.0

    vinilzord2.0 Fapstronaut

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    Damn right dude. As males we have to accept the fact that we are responsible for ANYTHING that happens in our lives. We can build our own destiny, if it's a bad or a good one it all depends on our daily choices.

    Thanks for sharing man :)
     
    vinilzord2.0, Jan 10, 2018
    vinilzord2.0, Jan 10, 2018
    #4
    kirlu72, Megasameru and Roady like this.
  5. Jan 10, 2018 #5
    Roady

    Roady Fapstronaut
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    The first time you are a victim.
    The second time it's your own responsibility.
     
    Roady, Jan 10, 2018
    Roady, Jan 10, 2018
    #5
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