Strong temptations after relationship ending

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by kingskipper28, Apr 14, 2019.

  1. kingskipper28

    kingskipper28 New Fapstronaut

    Hi all,

    My girlfriend and I had a devastating break-up about 3 months ago. We were living together and had plans for marriage but right around the start of the New Year I started having this drowning anxiety and wound up withdrawing emotionally which ended our relationship. I always struggled with intimacy throughout the relationship because of my PA and Gnostic believes (karezza, which she wasn't into) from 13-20 (I'm 30 now, so have been clean for 10 years with only one relapse with I was 25).

    This is why I struggle to believe in the reboot sometimes because I haven't been watching P or doing M for years but my brain is still messed up.

    Anyways, any fellow nofappers have some advice on how to deal with the strong temptations post-breakup? There's an emotional void now and the urge to M (even without using P) is really strong.

    Thanks in advance!
    Butterfly1988, A-Dogg and Kman20 like this.
  2. A-Dogg

    A-Dogg New Fapstronaut

    Not sure if I can be of much help, but stay strong man. Breakups are always tough in one way or another, and to me I find the sudden loneliness is the worst. You find yourself enjoying M just because it makes you feel good physically, but it can be very distracting for what matters most at the time.
    I feel that trying to pick up something to distract yourself outside your home might help a bit. I hate to say gym up and all that cliche, but it seriously does help with keeping busy and working out some physical tension. I’m in a transitional phase myself and a PMO reboot because I found myself getting into some dark stuff more than occasionally, which has inadvertently negatively impacted potential relationships. I find myself reading physical books at night before bed and staying away from electronics and media until I’m tired enough to sleep. I’m looking into a personal trainer to help keep me invested in working out until I have a routine as I’ve done in the past before relapsing. Just getting up and out of your head, avoiding anything close to P, and some sort of exercise can help. If you’re struggling with anxiety, you can always speak to a professional if you haven’t already and get some non-habit forming medications to help take the edge off and think clearer.
    You can do this brother. You’re not alone. Temptation is just temporary, but self respect is much bigger.
    Butterfly1988 likes this.
  3. de severn

    de severn Moderator Assistant Staff Member Moderator Assistant

    The porn and the masturbation are coping mechanisms. They numb the pain temporarily.
    A-Dogg and Butterfly1988 like this.
  4. fusionxx23

    fusionxx23 Fapstronaut

    Im day 22, and loneliness only seemed to increase. I see women less like objects, but im now hella emotional. Trying to get comfortable alone, it has been about a month since the breakup, it seems the ups are very high while the lows are super low. And my ex has already got with multiple people, and im here struggling to talk to females.

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