Success won't get you the girl

I'm reading Models - Mark Manson right now, there are many lessons to deal with myself, women and so on.

 

They probably have more than they realize. I for one didn't have much success with girls until very recently. What changed? I don't know, but it was subtle enough for me to barely notice anything. Wether one is able to attract people seems to be down to very little details that I think anyone could get right if only we could pinpoint what excatly they are.

 

Well, it's true, no? Not with semen retention, cuz this is bullshit. But for the rest, it is. You say "get". Getting a girl is easy if you have the looks and the bank account. What is harder, and you said it, is to develop a relationship.

However, you talk as if looks and the bank account don't matter. Which is false.

But anyway.

 

Do you have any tips on how to from the depths of my soul have a greater love and kindness in my thoughts towards women in general?

I notice I tend to hold onto past rejections and deep down have a little bit of anger towards women.

do you have any advice on overcoming this issue?

 

Sounds like a (I don’t mean this in an offensive way) problem of being egotistical. Being rejected isn’t an attack on your person, and people are allowed to reject you. Even if you’re a Chad, you’re going to strike out with more women than not.

When she’s not interested, drop it and move on. Learn to play a numbers game. Don’t attach to one woman, go and try to meet dozens, and attach to the one you’ve bonded with the longest and closest.

Also, don’t let women use you. If a girl isn’t expressing romantic interest, drop her. Men who have female “friends” that they are simultaneously in love with are puppets.

 

thanks for the reply. Yea I definitely agree about the egotistical part. I guess that’s truly what it is, deep down I just am taking it as an attack on my self.

I notice though that I have some lingering negative thoughts/feelings though towards women. That’s why I was asking Modern Milarepa if he had any techniques or special ways of thinking that would allow me to “unroot” these negative thought patterns.

I agree with your diagnose of being egotistical. However, how do you think I can go about curing it?

And yea haha, guys who act like they are friends with a girl when they actually like them are pretty pathetic in my opinion.

 

Oh f*ck I think I'm a woman.

 

at this point nothing will get me the girl huh

 

Why? You mean the girl can kill me with AK-47 because of war?

 

you are totally right, but women should not be a man's main focus should they ? if nothing makes you happy and you can't manage your life, looking for a relationship does not sound like a good idea... am i getting something wrong ?

 

thanks, had a few awkward experiences earlier this year, this notion of "understanding" i was familiar with, but you put it in a practical and genuine way, thanks again for showing new patterns of thinking !

 

Girls are attracted to high status men, but you shouldn't try to improve for girls, do it for yourself.

Just putting it out there for people, personally it doesn't matter to me becaue I'm not part of this game, I chose to live a celibate lifestyle.

 

Yes, me too. My philosophy is that I'm going to be celibate until I find "the one".

But for me, finding the one isn't going to be this big searching, approaching, attracting nightmare.

I'm going to be me, and just live my life. If she's there, or if she's not, I don't care.

Because I've dated, I've been married, I'm divorced and everything in between.

None of it is all that great.

 

I see, for me I'm not even looking for one, I just see more value in a life where I didn't turn into a shell of a man because I got married.

Funny enough in my teens I wanted a big family but I really got to know myself and what I really wanted out of life, I'm going down a different path to most people.

 

More people are foregoing the family life these days, I've read.

I was not a happy kid and I never got along with my dad,
so I just never really considered having my own family.

When I got married, my wife was 37, but she said she didn't want to have kids.

That 3 year window went by like a vapor.

But I never felt like I have missed anything, even to this day.

 

Alot of people have successfully pulled off the monk lifestyle and had a good life, so I know I'm not missing out on anything.