Susannah, i just have to say i have so enjoyed reading your journal. You are a wonderful person and the compassion, intelligence and strength you have shown inspire me. I hope you didnt take my comment the wrong way. My comment is about my own situation and the fact that i feel foolish for having found myself back in this situation again. I wrote that during a bad night. The fact is my SO did relapse, lie and fall into old habits. I am giving him one more chance but i have learned a lot and i believe we are both going into it better equiped this time. Just didnt want you to think that the idiot comment was directed to your situation.