Swearer of oaths,breaker of all of them.How to be man of character,and man of his word?

Hi everyone.I am new to this forum/community,how ever you refer to it.It means a lot to me,in a first place that there are people like me out there who went so far as to view masturbation and porn as a diseases and dangerous addiction,and not just as something of a natural urge as many people think of it.The type of people that went so far and wide,to found such community in the first place,despite the unpopular and ignorant opinion of majority that masturbation is ok,nothing wrong with it and just a natural outlet for stress and life frustration.I can attest by my self,if my testimony means anything,that this what is said about all of this,by general population,is a lie,one HUGE lie,just like one that Earth is square or that we are close relatives of cows.Either way since i started this foul thing at age of 13,a sin,addiction,a deranged behavior all in my book ,both from spiritual and empirical perspective my life was going spiraling downwards.I am naturally an introverted person,and by soul trait of it alone would have difficulties with interaction with my peers and other people,one way or another but that wouldn't as far go as if i had stopped masturbation,as if i had said back when i was 16 that i would stop that nasty soul sucking destruction.Alas to no avail since then,i have gone from periods where i would have excessively masturbate to 4 and 5 times a day,and basically be drained of life for at least next week,to begin able to hold onto even 3 weeks and then relapse 1 or 2 times one day,and then skip one day and masturbate in another.I have tried all,made promise to my self,my parents even made agreements with some of my friends back at the time,but NO just No,my urge my appetite to masturbate and relieve my self of animalistic aggressive energy of such an act,would always self sabotage me and return me weeks if not months back to the drawing board .Maybe this wouldn't be such an issue,though i morally consider it a sin,if it wasn't for actual psycho-physical issues that raised from it.As i mentioned before i am an introvert,and pretty typical one of that,where i get easily drained and exhausted in company of large people,especially in those toxic ones,that i have more frequently met.Other major symptoms were as following:i would feel anxiety and out of the touch of reality because i was so drained of energy that i couldnt care whats happening around me,suddenly aggressive and impatient behavior towards my close one,people i love and have closer bond,while hesitation and usually cowardice in face of toxic and aggressive enemies of mine,lack of confidence in interaction with opposite sex,lots of self hatred and negative thinking due to piercieved flaws,pale and dried like face where i would look ugly and atypical of my self with extended jaws and in drawn cheek bones looking like ugly/hungry harassed inmate of concentration camp,extremely poor memory and concentration,inability for creative thinking and ability for effective comebacks against my enemies namely bullys and psyhos i encountered through out my teen years,lack of physical strength and coordination(despite i am an Aspie i think i am fairly athletic and was able to retain some coordination and lot of strength during my prolonged periods of abstinence) both for sports and physical defense/protection of ones integrity against immature mentally limited and overaggressive bullies-to which i still regrate today because i avoided standing up to my self when i could if i just abstinated from masturbation and regained enough energy and mental focus to lauch counter attack them and face them physically/verbally,lack of self discipline and willpower to face and participate in everyday chores and obligations and many others such as betraying my family members and not fulfilling obligations i said i will do such as finishing college(i couldnt because i have no motivation or ability to study when i masturbate for several days,not only to mention i couldnt keep up with classes and all of that,that i have brought my self for repeating one year a few times) and many other related to normal life functioning/work ... TLDR, I am aware of negative implications of masturbation,i am an introverted Aspie who regrets not being able to fulfill his vow to quit masturbating and watching porn and gaining enough energy to stand up to fight people who would pick up on me for my flaws anyways,ambitious person who want to achieve a lot but cant be persistent enough to put aside bad habits(including fapping primarily) and then wasting its time and energy that could be used so much better for ones self and others personal gains if i hold true to my goal of quieting this disgusting habit and finding inner peace and happiness to pursue meaningful relations with whom i care about and they care about me,until death do us apart... How to be man/female of his word and quit this nasty addiction,over come ones animistic and lustful impulses,and limit ones sexual activity in this age of abundant content on internet and hyper sexuality?

 

Thanks a lot.Its a bit long,but for a introduction post,i think its sufficiently thorough and to the point,explaining things i care about and why i want to get rid of this habit...Greetings to you ,and i hope more like minded people will come with there aid and support.