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Taking my first step here

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by GroundedRabbit, Sep 17, 2019.

  1. Sep 17, 2019 #1
    GroundedRabbit

    GroundedRabbit Fapstronaut

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    Hello everyone!

    I'm a PA and I've been one for the past 15 years or so. I've been struggling with getting over my addiction for the past 3 years, unsuccessfully.

    I've been skulking around these forums for the better part of two years now, my AP however challenged me to make an introduction right now, something I've been having a hard time doing. But here I am.


    I don't think I've ever been serious enough or realized properly what the addiction is doing to me and people around me.

    The turning point came when I realized what I was doing was basically cheating, something I have high morals about. And researching betrayal trauma to understand my partner.

    I've since then been clean and I'm now trying to heal her while working on myself.

    We're having a child in two months or so and I need to step up my game before happens, not just getting PMO free but in life.


    I literally just woke up so the post seems somewhat short but I wanted to finish it asap this morning!

    @Tao Jones
     
    GroundedRabbit, Sep 17, 2019
    GroundedRabbit, Sep 17, 2019
    #1
    Deleted Account, Jefe Rojo, Coffee Candy and 4 others like this.
  2. Sep 17, 2019 #2
    Tao Jones

    Tao Jones Fapstronaut
    NoFap Defender

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    My Journal
    Welcome to the fight of your life! Congrats on almost three weeks of sobriety. Keep moving ahead, one day at a time. You can do this!

    I am glad we do not need to face this fight alone. Onward!
     
    Tao Jones, Sep 17, 2019
    Tao Jones, Sep 17, 2019
    #2
    Coffee Candy and rafael33 like this.
  3. Sep 17, 2019 #3
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    Hello and welcome! :)

    We are glad to have you as a part of our community. Here are some quick links to get you started.

    Getting Started Guide | How to Use theNoFap Forums | Panic Button | Day Counter | Rebooting Resources | ForumRules | Glossary

    If you wish to keep a journal of your progress you can do so in the appropriate section found here

    You can also take part in one of the manychallenges available. It can be a tremendous help. Challenges

    Also, there are groups you can also join if you wish to do so. You can browse through them here. Groups

    There are plenty of wonderful, friendly and knowledgeable people here to help you along on your journey to a life free of PMO. I wish you nothing but the best!
     
    Deleted Account, Sep 17, 2019
    Deleted Account, Sep 17, 2019
    #3
    rafael33 likes this.
  4. Sep 17, 2019 #4
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    Thanks for your example. I'm convinced we can't wish our way into behavior that is congruent with our values. We have to act our way. You appear to be doing just that! Having an AP...posting here because your AP suggested...being introspective and clarifying what's important in your life. So cool. Inspirational. Best wishes as your continue on your journey of progress.
     
    Deleted Account, Sep 17, 2019
    Deleted Account, Sep 17, 2019
    #4
  5. Sep 17, 2019 #5
    GroundedRabbit

    GroundedRabbit Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for the kind words!

    I've gotten quite a few things done today more regarding life than PMO, but it puts me in the right mindset either way.

    I feel good about myself today, something I normally don't do!

    I'll take a look around the forums to figure out my next step!
     
    GroundedRabbit, Sep 17, 2019
    GroundedRabbit, Sep 17, 2019
    #5
    Coffee Candy likes this.
  6. Sep 17, 2019 #6
    rafael33

    rafael33 Fapstronaut

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    Welcome to the Nofap community.
    The NO PMO journey is not easy but worth the effort.
    The community will support you.

    Maybe you want to make some commitment - not to the community but to yourself.
     
    rafael33, Sep 17, 2019
    rafael33, Sep 17, 2019
    #6
    Coffee Candy likes this.
  7. Sep 19, 2019 #7
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    Heyyy welcome to the NoFap forum : ) It's nice to see you here fighting the good fight alongside us!

    Here is just some advice:

    First and foremost please take a look at each section in the forum, there might be something(s) you may find of big help to you. Feel free to post there :+)

    Then secondly I just strongly advise you to be active on your profile(as there quite a few active people in the profile section). Please start by choosing an avatar and then make daily status posts to show you're active and needing support/encouragement. They've also got a neat little feature that shows freshly posted statuses for all users to see. People will find your profile and give you encouragement/support.

    People (are beginning to) love communicating in the profilesection..(it should be and is )mostly spportive talk but it doesn't hurt to deviate from supportive talk. It would be great to have you join in and support others in the threads, profiles, and journal. Make sure and be grateful for the help you received and help after receiving some. Invest in some people's journeys. We could always use your help and in return you shall receive some as well!

    Make sure and be grateful for the help you received and help after receiving some. Invest in some people's journeys.

    Thirdly, You should also highly consider creating a public journal and write about your days in more depth for us members to follow along your journey and offer support to you by way of posting in your journal.

    Last but not least: Good luck on your journey here, make sure to really give it a try with all your heart!
     
    Deleted Account, Sep 19, 2019
    Deleted Account, Sep 19, 2019
    #7
  8. Oct 6, 2019 #8
    GroundedRabbit

    GroundedRabbit Fapstronaut

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    I relapsed a few days ago and to be honest I could see it coming weeks before.

    I feel competely numb and have felt so for over a week now, and I don't really know how to deal with it.

    I went to meet a psychiatrist yesterday and that actually went and felt really good, I don't know if anything will come of it yet but I'll give it my best.

    The relapse involved something that my parter has clearly stated is crossing boundries and there is no defending what I've done.

    What I've done can be considered cheating, she sees it that way and I think I'm beginning to see it that way too. This is why I'm feeling so numb.

    I've always tried to run from my problems or put them aside and try to focus on anything else, something I'm doing more now than almost anytime before.

    I know I need to break this pattern BADLY, so I'm posting here and wrote to my AP (if he still wants to help me out considering I just went dead silent for 2 weeks without any reason).

    I'm commiting to starting a journal tomorrow and then sticking with it, cause I had my longest streaking going and learned something from it. But I really need something to stick to, to actually not just relapse every now and again.

    I'm also going to read up more on betrayal trauma and talk to my girl more about that part, cause I do want to help her heal and save our relationship but I've been so out of it for the past weeks that I've ruined more than I've saved.

    Tomorrow I'll get to those things aswell as get started studying, something I've always been putting off for no good reason for months now which has put us in an economic disaster that might be to late to save, but it's the only thing I can do currently to atleast try to help.

    My behaviour lately has been unacceptable and I need to stop running from everything, if I don't stop now, when will I ever?


    Thanks for the support, and I'll make you guys proud one day.
     
    GroundedRabbit, Oct 6, 2019
    GroundedRabbit, Oct 6, 2019
    #8
    Tao Jones likes this.
  9. May 29, 2020 #9
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    Deleted Account, May 29, 2020
    Deleted Account, May 29, 2020
    #9

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