TheProwler
Fapstronaut
Should've introduced myself first!
My situation's like most others here; pornography is problematic.
37 and feel like I've wasted much of my life with something I didn't understand, that was introduced (albeit something I consciously used) without anything but admonitions from society that it's 'bad,' whilst being used by a good portion of the (world) population. This hushed tone, taboo was too simplistic for a teenager/young adult to understand. Especially since there was no 'rights of passage' way for me to deal with issues.
I grew up in a religious, Pentecostal environment which was somewhat restrictive with strict parents. Sad to say, but I never developed the muscle that men need to interact with women. Aimless, clueless, listless and indolent!
I must admit sexual frustration has been a defining feature of my life; it impacted everything else. The mystique and prominence of sex, it's prohibition on (flimsily explained) religious grounds, the confusion of being a 1st gen Brit (parents are from another country,) and a general malaise and philosophical wondering about the true meaning/purpose of life, denial of the flesh, etc created quite the psychological conundrum!
I have had times without using porn and thinking back, I can't quite recall the reason why I was occasionally able to abstain. Over the years this has been something like a couple months, 8 -11 or so months where I just thought "who cares about porn?" and just didn't search. Other times I'd go to my specific websites once every 4, 5 days or so.
PMO are often linked behaviours. For me I watched porn, but it isn't directly linked to masturbation. I.e. I haven't masturbated watching a monitor for years. It's an irregular habit. I’m sure many here have had the dispiriting feeling of masturbation and orgasm. It’s a curious deflation orgasm from masturbation, at least for me.
I'm glad to be here and wish everyone the very best in their aims and aspirations. This is the missing key for success. I couldn't think my way through it and a sad laziness stopped me from truly seeing this as something that I should deal with. I.e. I know I disliked many aspects of my life, intuitively knew that porn was stripping physical and mental resources from me, but instead of accepting and bringing to light issues I'm opaquely aware of, I tried to piecemeal change my life. So superficial behavioural changes without dealing with the root issues.
Whew! That's a lot.
My situation's like most others here; pornography is problematic.
37 and feel like I've wasted much of my life with something I didn't understand, that was introduced (albeit something I consciously used) without anything but admonitions from society that it's 'bad,' whilst being used by a good portion of the (world) population. This hushed tone, taboo was too simplistic for a teenager/young adult to understand. Especially since there was no 'rights of passage' way for me to deal with issues.
I grew up in a religious, Pentecostal environment which was somewhat restrictive with strict parents. Sad to say, but I never developed the muscle that men need to interact with women. Aimless, clueless, listless and indolent!
I must admit sexual frustration has been a defining feature of my life; it impacted everything else. The mystique and prominence of sex, it's prohibition on (flimsily explained) religious grounds, the confusion of being a 1st gen Brit (parents are from another country,) and a general malaise and philosophical wondering about the true meaning/purpose of life, denial of the flesh, etc created quite the psychological conundrum!
I have had times without using porn and thinking back, I can't quite recall the reason why I was occasionally able to abstain. Over the years this has been something like a couple months, 8 -11 or so months where I just thought "who cares about porn?" and just didn't search. Other times I'd go to my specific websites once every 4, 5 days or so.
PMO are often linked behaviours. For me I watched porn, but it isn't directly linked to masturbation. I.e. I haven't masturbated watching a monitor for years. It's an irregular habit. I’m sure many here have had the dispiriting feeling of masturbation and orgasm. It’s a curious deflation orgasm from masturbation, at least for me.
I'm glad to be here and wish everyone the very best in their aims and aspirations. This is the missing key for success. I couldn't think my way through it and a sad laziness stopped me from truly seeing this as something that I should deal with. I.e. I know I disliked many aspects of my life, intuitively knew that porn was stripping physical and mental resources from me, but instead of accepting and bringing to light issues I'm opaquely aware of, I tried to piecemeal change my life. So superficial behavioural changes without dealing with the root issues.
Whew! That's a lot.
