The beginning of the End

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Chris Aurelius Denver, Sep 18, 2019.

  1. Hello dear Readers,

    My name is Chris Aurelius Denver. I am currently a nineteen year old young man and I live in the Netherlands.

    My masturbation habit started at the age of twelve, and the inevitable porn habit followed a year later. So that would make me thirteen years old when it started. I had just entered high school.

    PMO was always a way to relieve stress after a day at school. In those years I was being picked on and my confidence was even lower than what I would qualify as rock bottom nowadays. I did have friends and my family has always been there for me so I never did derail completely. Still, I would binge daily for almost three years, and it was beginning to show in my accomplisments. Grades dropped, just as motivation and energy levels. I was on a downwards slope, and deep down I realized this.

    I began searching for ways to develop myself from the young age of fifteen years old. That's when I came across a NoFap post on the internet. No idea anymore what the name of the post was but it was obviously against the use of porn and masturbation, I remember it talked about NoFap as a catalyst for self-improvement. This post stuck with me and I decided to try this "NoFap" challenge, not knowing how difficult it would be.

    That is where my journey really started. Now, four years later, I still haven't beaten the addiction, but it was one hell of a catalyst. My longest streak was thirty days, but I would make it to seven days regularly. In those four years I forged a personality for myself, started building on the life I wanted to live. Built habits (sports, reading, contemplation), and broke them (smoking, drinking excessevily and gaming). I've met and befriended amazing people. Even had multiple relationships with kind and loving partners.

    Yet after these great things, the NoFap challenge was always too difficult for me. My addiction got even worse, searching for darker and heavier porn every week. This addiction has been a blanket over a fourth of my life now, and I want it destroyed, deleted from my life.

    This is why I joined this community. After so many years of lurking here, my silence has finally been broken, and damn it feels good.

    My starting parameters are: No pornography of any kind, soft or hard. No masturbation. I wanted to do no ejaculation but because I am dating someone, that's out of the question sadly. I started today, September 18, at 12:00 o'clock.

    Feel free to speak with me. I will try to update a journal every evening, that's when I'll also probably respond to alerts and such.

    Best regards,

    Chris A. Denver
  2. Life's Journey

    Life's Journey Fapstronaut

    Hi Chris, welcome, and wishing you loads of strength and good luck with quiting porn. Sounds like that, despite your addiction, you've been making solid progress in many other areas over the last couple of years. Keep up the good work! You can do it! As a fellow Dutchman: ik wens je veel kracht toe met deze uitdaging!
    Chris Aurelius Denver likes this.
  3. Thank you very much for your kind wishes Life!
    And as Dutchman to Dutchman: Wij zullen door blijven vechten, opgeven kennen wij niet!
  4. But you've grown so much---learned so much about yourself....and have a fuller/better life it seems. I really like the 12 step saying "Progress not perfection" because we must all protect against slipping into shame. The fact we are here...that we care...that we set standards for ourselves speaks to that progress...and our pure motives.
    Chris Aurelius Denver likes this.
  5. Hello Lott,
    Thank you for those words, they made me think about the last few years, and you're right. My life has already improved so much. Yet I believe self-improvement, and with that progress, is a duty and goal on its own. But we must not be ashamed if perfection is not achieved.
    Oh, and also thank you for telling me about the 12 step saying, they are pretty inspirational!
  6. Tatendrang

    Tatendrang Fapstronaut

    Take it from a guy who was 19 when he figured out he needs to stop and didn't - stop now. Yesterday was too late. It will only get more difficult with time and you'll miss huge opportunities both in private life and career. Join our challenge to motivate yourself.
    Chris Aurelius Denver likes this.
  7. I joined the challenge, the counter is a lot more to my taste than the normal one!
  8. Hello and welcome! :)

    We are glad to have you as a part of our community. Here are some quick links to get you started.

    Getting Started Guide | How to Use theNoFap Forums | Panic Button | Day Counter | Rebooting Resources | ForumRules | Glossary

    If you wish to keep a journal of your progress you can do so in the appropriate section found here

    You can also take part in one of the manychallenges available. It can be a tremendous help. Challenges

    Also, there are groups you can also join if you wish to do so. You can browse through them here. Groups

    There are plenty of wonderful, friendly and knowledgeable people here to help you along on your journey to a life free of PMO. I wish you nothing but the best!
    Chris Aurelius Denver likes this.
  9. Coffee Candy

    Coffee Candy Moderator Assistant Staff Member Moderator Assistant

    Heyyy welcome to the NoFap forum : ) It's nice to see you here fighting the good fight alongside us!

    Here is just some advice:

    First and foremost please take a look at each section in the forum, there might be something(s) you may find of big help to you. Feel free to post there :+)

    Then secondly I just strongly advise you to be active on your profile(as there quite a few active people in the profile section). Please start by choosing an avatar and then make daily status posts to show you're active and needing support/encouragement. They've also got a neat little feature that shows freshly posted statuses for all users to see. People will find your profile and give you encouragement/support.

    People (are beginning to) love communicating in the profilesection..(it should be and is )mostly spportive talk but it doesn't hurt to deviate from supportive talk. It would be great to have you join in and support others in the threads, profiles, and journal. Make sure and be grateful for the help you received and help after receiving some. Invest in some people's journeys. We could always use your help and in return you shall receive some as well!

    Thirdly, You should also highly consider creating a public journal and write about your days in more depth for us members to follow along your journey and offer support to you by way of posting in your journal.

    Last but not least: Good luck on your journey here, make sure to really give it a try with all your heart!
    Chris Aurelius Denver likes this.

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