The chaser effect

I've been free of porn and masturbation for almost two weeks now (hurray!), but I recently went through a difficult time in my recovery. This weekend, I spent a lot of time with my girlfriend. It was the first time I had seen her since starting my reboot. It had been a while since we had sex, but we had sex on Sunday evening. Overall, I think doing this reboot has brought us closer together in many different ways, and this weekend was a really good experience for both of us, so I'm really happy about all of that and I'm looking forward to the new heights my reboot can take me to.

However, it's now been a few days since we had sex, and my urges to watch porn have been as strong as ever. The urges are even presenting themselves in unpredictable ways. In the past, I would usually feel urges before I went to bed. Strong as they were before, they were all in my head and felt like something I could deal with. I was so addicted that watching porn just felt like a natural part of my bedtime routine. However, the urges feel physical now. I can feel a physical discomfort surging through my body at times, and it feels like the only thing that will make it go away is porn. Is this what the chaser effect feels like?

Of course, I have every intention of staying true to my recovery and powering through this spike in difficulty. Whenever I feel an urge, I use the same techniques I used the first week of my reboot: I'll go and do something productive, whether that means exercising, meditation, going for a walk, calling a friend or family member, playing a musical instrument, or working on a personal project. That's been working out well so far, so I don't feel too worried about relapsing right now. I'm just confused about why I'm feeling such strong urges this far into my reboot, and wondering if anyone else has had similar experiences.

 

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