The Glorious Cold Approach Competition of 2016! (Triggers and Harsh Language)

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by Mr. Sir, Dec 29, 2015.

  1. Temujin

    Temujin Fapstronaut

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    Welcome ☺. I recommend this challenge to anyone and everyone.

    My new focus is on being super low energy. Leaving lots of space. Speaking slowly. Being physically still.

    I'm generally a very awkward person. So if I can learn to use my natural awkwardness to create and escalate sexual tension then that will be ace.

    Today I'm having a bad day. But still I will push myself to at least leave the house and go for a walk. Even if I don't speak to a girl today I'll stand next to one on the street or in a shop. Looking at something on the Isle of the local supermarket. All I really want to do today is just lie in bed, but off I go. Wish me luck

    Edit:

    Stood next to a few cute girls. Asked one for directions. Immediately feel better. My current whole focus is on speaking slower. That's going to be my whole focus for a while
     
    Last edited: Mar 7, 2016
  2. volt2187

    volt2187 Guest

    Kind of an off day for me as the one girl I've been talking to avoid me today (we were supposed to meet up saturday morning), but I contacted her through text later in the day maybe working things out I don't know lol. I talked to the other one from a different class and her enthusiasm to speak with me instantly brought a smile to my face. She's started asking me questions which is a sign you guys have posted that they start to gain interest. Part of me thought she wouldn't care to talk much since I somewhat ignored her friday, but that wasn't the case.

    I've been meaning to ask her out but again failed to do so 2 days in a row now. I'll do it wednesday because I've felt shitty each time afterwards and I can't keep this act up. One of her friends in the class (who I talk to too) even commented to her that I'm a really nice guy. Fuck! hahaha I was very tempted to message her through facebook, but I don't want to go that route, real men tell them in person and I don't want to do it that way anyways, I just wanted to because of being in the moment and not wanting to wait till the next time I see her.

    Later in the gym I did my first compliment in a few weeks, on the woman's hair (she was fairly older than me), and while brief she thanked me. I didn't even think about it, just did it. Probably because I just ran 2 miles so was out of breath haha. Baby steps guys, baby steps.
     
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  3. Landomike

    Landomike Fapstronaut

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    Nice brother! I'm planning on going out tonight to the mall for the first time. How old are these girls you talked to?
     
  4. Buzz Lightyear

    Buzz Lightyear Fapstronaut

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    I like the more mature ones, who know what they are about. Age does not concern me too much though most girls I meet are late twenties through to late thirties. The girl I met in the previous post [at a coffee shop] I will meet tomorrow evening.
     
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  5. volt2187

    volt2187 Guest

    Another day another approach, this one took balls! I was at the gym and I saw a girl there who I've seen a few times before. We were both standing near the sit-up bench and she kept looking over at me, so I got closer and she asked me if I was using it, which I told her no. I proceeded then to mention seeing her before, got her name and we talked for about a minute or 2. It was fairly basic, but now when I see her again I'll be able to chat her up some more. It definitely was the hardest one I've done so far because man that workout outfit, fuck me haha. :eek: The feeling afterwards though of not giving any fucks about the 20 plus other people there and initiating the entire thing was pretty badass of me and felt great.

    It helped boost my confidence too because it was a fairly uneventful day otherwise. I decided to forget about the one girl I was going to ask out. The only reason I was going to was because of how it's been easy for me to talk to her, but she isn't my type at all and I don't want to waste our time. Maybe if we talk more, but I'm not interested in her that way anymore. Still an excellent thing to keep talking to her and others to boost my confidence so when I do find one I want to ask out I'll feel comfortable doing it.

    Let's see what tomorrow holds!

    O I almost forgot to mention too that there has been this one chick who has been coming into my work ever so often, who I've seen about 5 times and have already gotten her name, that I want to ask out eventually when I see her again. See does have a kid, but I don't care, can't let that hold me back. I always make it a point to talk to her when I see her there so why not step it up a notch? What's the worse that could happen, she reports me to the manager? hahaha
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 10, 2016
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  6. Temujin

    Temujin Fapstronaut

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    Congrats man. Sounds like a great approach!
     
  7. Landomike

    Landomike Fapstronaut

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    That's great. Have a good time
     
  8. Landomike

    Landomike Fapstronaut

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    Do you go meet girls at malls or coffee shops on a strip?
     
  9. Buzz Lightyear

    Buzz Lightyear Fapstronaut

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    I don't like to impose too much on a woman if she is busy going about her day. I'd rather strike up a conversation where both parties are relaxed enjoying a coffee, or a beer. Even better, if I get some sign of interest from her I'm perfectly primed to jump at the opportunity.:rolleyes:
     
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  10. Landomike

    Landomike Fapstronaut

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    Great point. I'll have to find some coffee shops to hang out at on my days off. I've been getting out more, plus I'm about to hit 30 days hardmode so life is about to get alot more interesting.
     
  11. Landomike

    Landomike Fapstronaut

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    I'll have to find some coffee shops to hang out at on my days off. I've been getting out more, plus I am about to hit 30 days of hardmode. Life is about to get alot more interesting.
     
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  12. Temujin

    Temujin Fapstronaut

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    Had another date with the girl who rejected my kiss attempt. She came round mine after and chilled and drank. When she was leaving she said she had a great time and wanted to meet again.

    Still I am struggling with creating sexual tension and escalation. I felt I was better this time. Creating a little more. We where bantering and teasing each other so had some practice at that.

    Still, onwards and upwards!
     
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  13. volt2187

    volt2187 Guest

    Ah come on guys, who else is going to join in me in the joys of cold approaches! I promise you it gets easier, and this is coming from a guy who has barely any social life and for years talked to no one.

    Today was smoothhhhhh like butter! At work there was the chick who was covering a shift for someone else, but she was from out of town so it was for just today. No hesitation, just went right up to her and started talking. I made sure give eye contact and showed a ton of interest in her. I know for a fact I could have hooked up with her tonight the way it was going down, but living with my parents still inhibits that, but man if I had my own place...

    At a few points too she kept looking at my crotch lol. I was sporting a boner a few times so she probably noticed hahaha. All good signs and I didn't come across as needy or anything like I previously have to other girls, I walked away a few times leaving the door open for her to chase me. We never did exchange names, but I attribute that to the fact I'll probably never see her again. Man if it's going to be this easy from now on my future is looking bright! :cool:
     
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  14. Buzz Lightyear

    Buzz Lightyear Fapstronaut

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    Beat this! Chilling in the cafe, when I notice the cutest girl walking around kind of looking semi-lost. We noticed each other at the same time. But then she left. I decide I need to read a book, and stop chasing woman, so I go the the bookshop. And blow me down, there she is again. Once again we noticed each other at the same moment. So it only seemed proper to strike up a conversation, and take her for a coffee there and then in bookshop's cafe. She was looking a little lost after all! ha ha. Had a great chat, got her number, and hope to see her again. And now just struck up a conversation with a woman in her last year of airline stewardess training. Gave her my card. Life is good! Get out there people!
     
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  15. Earl Sweatshirt

    Earl Sweatshirt Fapstronaut

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    Someone here set a goal for me, how many should I talk to this week?
     
  16. Temujin

    Temujin Fapstronaut

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    Updates.

    I get the feeling the girl I've been on a few dates with is interested in getting more serious. We are texting much more and have much more banter between us.

    I'm going to start practicing staying in the interactions as long as possible. Up until now I've been asking for directions, possibly asking a second question and then walking. Now I'm going to stay put after asking my question. Maybe checking my phone but not moving. Just get used to staying in an interaction as long as possible. Saying anything else which comes to mind.

    Also having much more success with Tinder now. You're profile picture makes such a difference! Have a few more girls interested in meeting for a date. Also getting better at bantering via text.

    Onwards and upwards, slowly but surely!
     
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  17. never_again

    never_again Fapstronaut

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    3 months on its going good , im getting better but i still dont get one thing ....why the hell is difficult to talk to or create opportunities with the girls you're interested in , and you can have a fun time with those who you arent interested in ... all the wrong girls are falling for me .... guys if you could just help me in this issue - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/to-date-or-not-to.61937/
    seriously i need the viewpoint of this thread users !
     
  18. volt2187

    volt2187 Guest

    I replied to your thread @never_again but here's some more advice. Don't over think things and don't create bogus scenarios in your head about being with this girl or how perfect she is, etc, etc. When you see one that you're attracted to (or not), just approach her and be yourself. Don't worry about screwing up or saying the wrong thing, with time you'll learn what to say and not to say and how to approach any of them, including the ones you're attracted to.

    Focus on yourself and not being with girls or getting their number and it will get a lot easier for you. They'll see the confidence in you and you wont come across as needy or desperate (which is probably the number one turn off for them).
     
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  19. Brasileiro

    Brasileiro Fapstronaut

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  20. Landomike

    Landomike Fapstronaut

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    I went to the mall yesterday to get new clothes and to celebrate for putting 20 pounds on my bench press. I strolled in feeling great. I walked around for awhile, went into barns and noble, and noticed two girls but they looked underaged. Moved on to Hollister to buy a new outfit.

    I went in and met a Filipino girl who worked there. She was so cute it killed me. I asked questions regarding clothes and made perfect eye contact, it was awesome and addicting. I shopped around, tried on more clothes and with her help I got a outfit together. As I was checking out I went for it. I asked when her break was and if she would like to get coffee. She said she worked through the evening so that wasn't going to work. I got her number and left. Her name was Jessica, cute as fuck.

    I left the mall and drove home. I was feeling good but I was trying not to get my hopes up. The whole situation was easy for me and that was my first legit try to get a number. I was feeling confident that I could do it again.

    Fast forward to later, I went to Texas road house for a big juicy steak. A guy from work told me that plenty of Latinas work there so I had to find out. I felt nervous going in cause I hadn't been there before but my intention was to text the girl while I ate. I texted " hey, how was work?" I get a immediate response saying "fuck is this?". My heart fucking sank. I said that I was the guy you met at work and this person replied back with " wrong number fam". She had given me someone else's number and I was crushed. I got plenty of looks from the waitresses but I didn't care in the slightest. One Hispanic waitress locked eyes and smiled. I smiled back but I wasn't as excited as she was.


    It's the morning after and I'm feeling better. I don't hate this girl. I'm definitely not going to give up and become one of those pussy mgtow betas and blame all my short comings on women. I'd appreciate any advice.
     

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