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Discussion in 'Events & Challenges' started by hoping_cannon, Jul 15, 2020.
Hi are you fine.man
On one occasion Gary Wilson he tweeted about masturbation, he said that sex produces strong bonding and also releases other neurotransmitters and some other things but he didn’t directly say fapping is bad he said it’s isn’t as good as sex.
Also brother frequent masturbation might desensitise your penis when you have sex with your partner.
I also tried masturbating without porn like a month ago it eventually lead me to porn and ruined my streaks.
Well maybe you can talk about your masturbating in that group. This post is for a challenge. I honestly don't like hearing all the details about your fap sessions.
Lil you are kidding yourself man.
I know many guys who had to quit only falling and it has had an impact on their sex lives. Pmo stands for porn masturbating and orgasm. It is all the individual actions regardless of if you watch p or not. So if you think it's ok to just mo you are wrong.
Trust me the science that you believe now that it's ok. That is funded by the p industry. Because if you keep fapping alternate days. You will eventually turn back to porn as the m just doesn't work after a while.
Save yourself years of issues and just quit.
Do you guys think you can abstain from porn if you find your partner?
Day 4 no P, P-subs, day 1 no MO
No urges today, or even yesterday really. I do think that for me that sometimes fapping is not helpful. I don't particularly feel shame for doing it in certain scenarios, but it does increase the urge to PMO, and that is unhelpful. If I can make it to 10 days with out PMOing or MOing, I think I will be in the clear from the chaser effect, though I will still have to stay vigilant as always of mediating triggers.
I am trying to get up at 8:30AM right now, as it is too difficult to get up at 5AM in the mornings. With that said, 5AM is the ultimate goal and if I can make the next 3-4 days getting up at 8:30AM, I will move the clock back half an hour and every 4-7 days, move the time back half an hour until I am getting up at 5AM every morning. That also means getting to be by 9-9:30PM every night when I do get up at 5AM. My earliest class is at 9:30AM this coming fall, but I do not know when I will be teaching, so I might have an 8:50AM class, which means rising at 5AM would give me an extra three hours in the morning to do some good in my day before I would need to head to work.
Anyway, thanks for your support and suggestions. I know that if I were to decide to ease out of MO slowly, I would need to take a place from the challenge, but the goal is to go cold turkey and have fewer and fewer slip-ups as time goes on. That does not mean that I will intentionally seek out MOing, but it does mean, I will be kind to myself as I get clean. I probably will not be able to post this weekend as I will be out of town and away from my computer, but I will definitely be on here Monday to let everyone know how I am doing and ideally I will be 7 days clean from porn and 4 days clean from MO.
That would be only kidding oneself. It needs to be dealt with first. Only then is one a suitable match for someone else.
Hey there! Welcome back How are you and How was your exam?
Good to see you around
Actually it depends and varies from person to person. You cannot expect same result in all time and situation. But in my life down this road I’ve seen people getting into a relationship and said they easily getting out of this addiction but for some when they breakup they getting into PMO again. So yeah it depends upon the situation and one’s view on relationship for that matter.
Day zero. Back in the fields. Growing potatoes and corn.
Stay strong brother. I feel like all active members here gonna reach 90 Day mark at once. Time has come and we need to act upon it. Let’s do this.
This is the last time I relapse.
Back to Day 1 as Farmer.
The thing is to avoid chaser effect is what I’m focusing right now. New month new challenges ahead. Need to evolve as a new men with clear focus on goal is what I need right now.
My dream is to buy a Range Rover and drive off-road. Currently I have zero money in bank, living with my parent’s Support. Even if I try I’m unable to express feelings with my parents kinda stoic in nature but something is pushing me behind when it comes to express my mood to the people in my circle. My parents wants me to open up and share what is going with my daily life. But I can’t really able to open up.
I don’t have a girl friend, along the way some girls tried to have a chat with me, I never cared and didn’t provide much attention to build a conversation. These PMO ruined my love life and relationship with my parents in all way it can.
Even still I have some close friends around Neither I share my happiness nor express my sadness that I undergo in daily life with them but they share with me till date but I can’t. I just pose me as a neutral in all way. Just stuck in the middle of nowhere.
This is now or never for me. If I can able to free myself from PMO, I will treat myself by purchasing a Range Rover and drive with all energy. Pure fun. To attain such level of standard, I need to work hard, take risk and some luck on my side.
It is almost 10 years PMO is ruining my life and I failed to overcome but Next 10 years gonna be so crucial for my future. So I don’t wanna mess that up like I did before.
The job which I’m doing right now will nowhere get myself to own my car. I don’t have excellent grades either in my college just an average student, can’t complain much because I know I deserve this new job with low pay. I messed up my life running behind money and failed almost all the challenges along the way I chose.
So need to shift some gear over the course of time. Now I’m a loser but that not gonna stop me from owning my Range Rover.
I’m not trying to get the ultra rich status but want a normal standard happy life to get along with my family and loved ones.
If I’m able to completely disconnect PMO from my life, I hope I will buy the Range Rover in near future and share here the pic of me behind the wheel.
Until then… Stay strong! Stay cool!
Sorry for the long story. Cannot believe I expressed my thoughts usually I am an introvert. First time in my life doing the things like I never did before. Everything in life happens for a reason. Accept and move on…
Every day clean is another step closer to dreams we see and also dreams we can't imagine yet! Keep going brother never look back.
Here is a link that should help you never relapse again!
Day 8 no P/P-subs
Day 3 no MO
I MO'd three times last week, once on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Have not peeked or fished since a week ago this past Sunday, and the urges have subsided. I know why I MO'd those times. I was really anxious for the weekend as I was staying the weekend at my romantic interest's place, and it would just be the two of us. There were a lot of thoughts running through my head, and as I did not want to act out of turn with her, I acted out of turn with myself. (And by the way, not looking for any response for better or worse, I know what I did and I accept full responsibility, so I do not need to be told why MO is so bad, I know.)
With that said, one thing that came out of this, is that I did not go back to porn after a couple MO sessions without it. Not going to continue lighting that match, but it is progress as in the past the chaser led me straight back to porn, but I have no desire to look at porn. Heck, after the anxiety that was this weekend, I no longer have the urge to MO. The weekend went well, she and I are closer than ever (we cuddled and held hands and talked a lot), and I just signed up for live Spanish classes through June 30th on Babbel.
Lastly, I am not sure how much more I will be on these forums for now, as I need to get my life straight, and focusing on the streaks, while potentially motivating, puts a lot of pressure on me. I will update my counter when I have set backs, but I think that for now, I will be taking a step back from the forums. With that said, I will check in to update my ranking when I upgrade in the challenge, and to give a brief update of where I am at (so day 5 and day 10 coming up). I will only post if I reset/relapse if it changes my ranking, but otherwise, I will be adjusting my counter and you can check out my account to see where I am at otherwise. I am saying all this so that you know that I am still here and not quitting the challenges, just taking a step back.
Hello, I wanted to apologize for any triggering I caused you with my talk of MO last week. I was not trying to discuss my MO sessions, but rather to seek help with what I saw was troubling about them. With that said, it seems to me that you may be struggling as you wrote differently last week than in the past, and usually people's writing changes when they are going through something. I know I tend to lash out when I am struggling, or to make excuses for my behavior, and I could sort of see that in your writing (the struggle, not anything else). So with that said, how are you doing? Is there anything I can do to help you in my limited capacity as an anonymous blogger?
I am doing well myself, as I said above, and last week was very confusing for me, and all of the MOing was due to anxiety. Now that I know that it was caused by anxiety, I know better how to treat it without MOing.
Yeah I also am sorry for how I lashed out at you man. I have been really struggling and then the relapses really took a serious toll.
I guess just being a little older than you and seeing where your at. In a way I'm saying 'dear younger me' to you and I'm trying to warn you to sort this out asap. Do not make any allowances because I threw away a lot of lovely girls because of my m'ing issues. Trust me mo is as bad as pmo. It's draining your life force and women can tell. Subconsciously. Just trust me on that.
I want to see you succeed and I want to see you fall in love. But truth be told it won't all play out like a fairy tail if your losing yourself on the ground caught up in a world of fantasy.
She is interested in you now don't let it all slip through your fingers.
Trust me you are only fooling yourself when you try to justify mo.
Read this whole post my friend and read it multiple times click all the links on it until you understand why you need to leave all this behind.
All the best man I truly hope you figure it out. And you don't have to leave just please be honest with yourself mo is really bad.
The website you shared is really incredible. Actually I was in the urge to relapse but I somehow managed to landup here then saw your post and read all the content of the website. The 5 minutes meditation I did clears my mind. It was really an eye opener for me right now. The urge to relapse gone in thin air.
Feeling better and climbing the mountain.
I appreciate you looking out for me. I actually did something similar to a guy who was younger than me who reminded me of my younger self. I am on day 4 no MO day 9 no PMO. I realized that I did not want to be caught up in fantasies about this woman of interest because to be honest, she is very real and more real than any fantasy. I decided to do the following when it comes to MO. If I have the urge to MO, I will take a step back and analyze my feelings and the consequences. If I am anxious or suspect I may be running from something, I will stop and treat the source instead of suppressing it with MO. If I see nothing there (which I suspect will rarely happen), then I will analyze the consequences of my actions versus long term goals. If I see no barrier, then I will MO, but I will then have to take full responsibility for my actions and any unforeseen consequences. I realized the thing to do is to not deny myself the quick release, but rather to put enough space between thought and impulse so that I can make a rational decision. I believe this method will work because if I allow for the possibility of M'ing again someday, I will not deal with FOMO, and yet, I make this promise to myself and all of you that I will STOP and not act on impulse. If I chose to act, it must be my own choice and not due to anxiety or horniness.
Truth be told, M'ing feels good, if it didn't I wouldn't do it, but there are more important things out there than quick pleasure. I must be like the kid who waits for the second marshmallow to have both instead of impulsively eating the first and thus rejecting a second. That it, I must focus on the pleasures in life and relationships and not the pleasures in the bathroom by myself with my fantasies (which are not real). I must focus on patience and future pleasures (not just sexual but the pleasures of good company or publishing my book), and I must reject the immediate impulse to Fap. Fapping is eating the first marshmallow and rejecting the second, and the pleasures of life are waiting out the desire to fap and instead getting the two marshmallows.
Anyway, I appreciate you all @hoping_cannon @Falcon 003 @Fine Man and of course you @Henryforward
Good stuff brother. Keep it up we will be free from this plague!