Day 7 & 8 Couldn't pop in yesterday, got struck by a stomach virus that left me incapacitated, thought I was going to setup shop in the bathroom. But the good news is, I'm no longer an orc, just another week and I'll back to being a hobbit again.
Checking in Fellowship Friends, Day 404 free of MO and day 13 free of porn. Strong urges today and last night and my sleep was off. I must be vigilant today. Stay strong!
Checking in Fellowship!! 25 days done. Spending the night at Amon Sûl Mild day today, feeling tired and demotivated but not as much as before, i think withdrawal is slowly fading . Anyway i try to do my things, despite the lack of energy. Things such as the new items for our quest Here´s the new one "34 days – Bree sends aid! Bill, a strong and kind pony, joins your quest by carrying rations and items. Quest Aid – Bill, the pony " Fellowship, to prevent quest marks becoming too jammed, i delayed the next mark 2 days. So entering the Misty Mountains will now be at day 37 "37 days – You enter the cold Misty Mountains, the Hithaeglir." Let´s keep going Fellowship!!! Towards the Mountain!!!
Day 43 – We tried to pass through Caradhras but the PMO forces were strong there. Too strong indeed, and I've fallen. Day 0 - Nazgûl (I was once a man, a King, now fallen to the power of PMO) Well, fellows, yes, I lost my streak. Everything began with a wet dream, not just an erotic one but an absolute wet dream. First time indeed. As the quick start guide says, maybe I began at an early age and never stopped. The craving increased, not only the urges but the cravings. Also, I was too tired, and I didn't write here for the past four days. I began to question if this sacrifice was worth it and so on. Yesterday we went out, and well many triggers collided yesterday and today with not only not having enough strength to stop it but indeed, I didn't want to stop it. I haven't binged yet, and I plan to continue here, now understanding that this is a long journey, and with the compromise to beat my previous streak, I'll eventually reach 90. I am sorry. And the journey is about to start.
This kind of accountability, having to "confess" to your fellows and start over, is what this is all about. It can be discouraging to lose a good streak, but turn it into a learning experience and recognize that you went 43 days without succumbing to ANYTHING. You've got this. Go for Grey Wizard this time around.
Day 56 check in--battling my way across Khazad Dûm! I am currently experiencing high demands on my time from work as well as at home, and my stress has been rising while my hours of sleep have been decreasing. I know this is a recipe for danger, so I am focusing on maintaining my morning habits (workout, breathing, cold shower, meditation moment) and checking in with my wife in the evenings. I am also taking a break tonight from the stress to go see a musical with my brother. Prioritizing real relationships and real life is key for me to avoid the pull of M urges.
Day 30. Wow, first month, I'm so glad to reach this point. I'm Elf now, my mind calm and focused. Relationships with my new girlfriend better every day, hope it will this way. Visiting gym, meditating and being optimistic. @RiseToGreatness , sorry for non-daily check-ins, but this thread important for me and helps to improve my life, thank you!
Day 60 Two months without PMO - a milestone that is a very small step for man, but a great leap for an ex-addict. I’m pleased to have made it to Lothlórien, and finally not feeling ill from the flu! I did have some unusual urges earlier, I was sat at my desk watching Netflix when I realised my flatmate was out and I could choose to find some P and MO if I wanted to - it was unusual because I wanted to. I don’t know how to best describe the feeling but I just didn’t care about relapsing, quite worrying. Nevertheless, I’ve made a promise to myself, and I can’t turn back now.
I was watching your progress with a smile. It is sad that you have fallen, but what is life if it isn't fallin' and gettin' back up again? I wish you well, don't get lost, find the light. Strenght & Honor.
Day 78 complete. I have started looking a women once again. Bit by bit, urge by urge and I am cheking out women at our workplace slack and in real life. I must stop. I also have fantasies about my wife that will probably never come true. I have to get rid of them some how.
