Checking in Fellowship!! 98 days, going good . Not the best sleep last night, and my energy has taken a little drop, but i will try to make the best of this day anyhow. Feeling slightly better in terms of reboot estability than yesterday Nothing more to add. Have a great day my friends and a great weekend ahead!!!
Day 41 / 1000. Quite tempted past few days. What can you do... I am tempted but that doesn't mean I have to rush and search p. Also, I am quite chill about this. I understand that this will be very long journey. So, trying to not have any big expectations short term, because tension can have opposite effect. Just trying to do the right thing. I think... Also, I am trying to get away from poisonous mindset that I got from maybe watching too much nofap videos, where they promise stable progress and benefits. Somehow many of them omit the hard part - withdrawals, temptations, having to deal with health or mind issues that I masked with pmo drug... Reaching 41 days hard mode. It's nice. But it doesn't mean much. Clothes don't make the monk. Lots of other stuff need to be addressed inside. Spoiler: Journey stuff Stuff that should help to not pmo: 1. No internet for recreational purposes until 6 pm. 2. Waking up on the same time every day.
Day 133 Today was pretty positive; finished up at college with only two more weeks to go, and then had a good leg workout and steam in the afternoon. Spent a few hours working on my sermon, only need to tidy up the ending and rehearse it for a few hours tomorrow - feeling a lot better about it than my previous two sermons, but I just pray that the Holy Spirit uses me however it deems fit. Having a weird relationship with urges at the moment as they seem to being coming back with full force. If I had to guess I would say they are as strong as they used to be when I began abstaining from PMO, but I think this reboot has helped me recognise that I don't need to indulge them. Everything feels quite novel at the moment, as if I'm only abstaining for selfish reasons, but I must remember that my life is infinitely better without PMO and the side effects it causes.
Day 25 complete, nothing out of normal yesterday. The problem is today, i felt a lot of anxiety because a situation i had this afternoon and i notice that i wanted to fap so fucking bad to release this feeling, and then when i didnt do it i started fantasy being with a girl and feel loved. I really dont know if its ok to be with girls before 90 days reboot, i think its not but i really want to be with somebody. fuck
Day 4 Watched Karate Kid tonight and it summed up what I’ve been missing in my life and what I need to do. I have kept my strength and power inside and it’s time I brought it out. I have potency as an individual and I am dangerous. I have power. I have strength. I have a voice. I’ve realised I have a lot of power as an individual. But right now it’s too chaotic and it needs to be tamed. I’m considering signing up for Karate lessons.
Day 1 complete--Orc status. Today was pretty chill. I drove with my dad to help my brother move out of his college dorm, and that took up most of the day. It was nice having a couple hours with each of them just to talk about whatever we wanted to. Urges were absent. The first thing I did when I woke up was to grab my prayer journal and write on the inside cover, "I will not PMO today!" Our Lady of Fatima, pray for us!
Day 11! ( Uruk - Hai ) Have a nice day guys Be kind to yourself. Try to understand yourself, your weaknesses, urges “Don't count the days. Make the days count.” —Muhammad Ali
