The Lord of the Rings Challenge

Day 4

Quest Aid – Song of Bombadil

Today was not too bad actually. Went through the usual ups and downs of daily life, called my old pastor in the afternoon, called a friend. The whole day and pretty much every moment of every day recently I've been feeling unbearable agony almost non-stop. Decided on a whim to pray the rosary tonight right while I was feeling anxious and stressing about packing. Had no idea that the first mystery today was the Agony in the Garden. Perfectly described what I've been going through in my heart lately, and praying the rosary gave me a peace and clarity that I hadn't felt all day.

I'm going abroad tomorrow without too many plans and on a one-way ticket. The road ahead is uncertain, but I believe that it's when life is uncertain that faith becomes real. So I'm looking forward to it.

Not sure how often I'll be able to check in on here in the coming days, but I'll try keep it up. It's good for me to check in here.

Godspeed, brothers!

 

congratulations bro!

 

Day 83
7 days left for day 90
Good luck!

 

Day 3 complete. PMO forces have spotted me! With haste I use the Buckleberry Ferry to cross the Brandywine River.

Feeling good today. Inspired by the milestone I reached today on the quest, here's a bit of Tolkien lore/trivia for you all which showcases the insane amounts of detail and attention he put into his worldbuilding. The name "Brandywine River" is a corruption by the hobbits of the original Elvish name for the river, which was Baranduin. You can see the same root word in the River Anduin. Not only did Tolkien invent various fictional languages, he even showed the ways those languages changed over time based on their contact with different groups of people. This is the level of dedication, creativity, and sheer genius we are capable of achieving for ourselves once we leave our bad habits behind.

St. John Henry Newman, pray for us!

 

12 days, feeling good.

@kaerhal amazing work, wow, you can be proud of yourself! Very inspiring!

Guys, reminder to use Ecosia instead of Google and plant trees with your web serches. Best thing you can do against global warming.

 

41 (9 hard mode) days complete

I am a bit tired because I don't get enough sleep, I drink coffee, didn't work out because I had more important business and I will not work out today because I am going to another town for work. Doing ok PMO-wise - didn't phish any more

 

Day 348! Blessings in this day my friends!

 

Congratulations!

 

Day 7

I have resumed work.

 

40 days – In the bridge of Khazad Dûm a strong battle is fought against PMO.

So far so good, had a good day yesterday, went for a walk with my wife and a dog.

This morning I went to the beach to swim in the sea.

 

Day 3 no PMO. I’m in a very low place mentally right now. Having a hard time seeing the good and super stressed about work.

 

DAY 1 At Buckland, recieved Sting from Bilbo.

 

Peeked after 4 days clean. No MO. Resetting counter.

 

Day 6 check in

 

Dawn of the 9th day

Thanking about the times I've fallen in the past. The road there was somewhat gradual. Things would start in my head. Seeing somewhat triggering things in a show would lead me further. I'd start touching my penis more. Triggering things in shows would inspire me to look at clothed images. Sooner or later I'd be back on a full binge

Throughout all this I'm already on the way back to sobriety. Sooner or later I stop. The path to stopping ran parallel to the path to falling.

 

Checking in Fellowship Friends!

8 Days Free of PMO.

The withdrawal escalated yesterday, further anxiety midday and fatigue. I felt like I was dragging my legs through murky and thick water. I had more sleep disturbance last night too. Feeling on edge.

Regardless, I know how important it is to continue on with proper habits, so these can take over in regulating dopamine and serotonin. Recovery is nothing but a mirage if we just sit counting the days.

Today will reach 40 degree Celsius, so I will limit physical activity. More sit down work today instead.

Stay Strong!

@kaerhal Congratulations on your continued success! You have grown quite a bit since I left, keep following your path friend.

@LuckyMan Be proud of being honest with yourself and keeping yourself accountable. Keep moving forward.

8 days – Gildor Inglorion, an Elf, crosses your path causing a Nazgûl that was chasing you to flee. You stay the night with his company of Elves talking about your struggles with PMO. "Courage is found in unlikely places" he says, and gives you an Hithlain rope, a magical rope, light and flexible, yet extremely strong.

 

The thought to check out a gaming forum is there. I could go visit that playground. Instead I'll post here and trust not going there will keep me out of pornography alley.

 

Check in 84.

REIGNITE YOUR THOUGHTS
“Your principles can’t be extinguished unless you snuff out the thoughts that feed them, for it’s continually in your power to reignite new ones. . . . It’s possible to start living again! See things anew as you once did—that is how to restart life!” —MARCUS AURELIUS, MEDITATIONS, 7.2

Have you had a bad couple of weeks? Have you been drifting away from the principles and beliefs that you hold dear? It’s perfectly fine. It happens to all of us.

In fact, it probably happened to Marcus—that may be why he scribbled this note to himself. Perhaps he’d been dealing with difficult senators or having difficulties with his troubled son. Perhaps in these scenarios he’d lost his temper, became depressed, or stopped checking in with himself. Who wouldn’t? But the reminder here is that no matter what happens, no matter how disappointing our behavior has been in the past, the principles themselves remain unchanged. We can return and embrace them at any moment. What happened yesterday—what happened five minutes ago—is the past. We can reignite and restart whenever we like.
Why not do it right now?

 

45 days
Some urges yestarday, suffering of ¨blue balls¨ in some part of the day, but managed focusing in my work tasks.

Today I worked out took a cold shower.
Keep strong my brothers.