Day 0, reset to PMO. I'll be honest, I feel like crying. We are eight days into October and I've reset twice. That's once every four days, or basically twice a week. Two years ago I was at a point where I would relapse once every two weeks, not the other way around. I just keep slipping more and more. And the worst part is that I was having such a fantastic day up until I looked at porn. I was being very producting and accomplishing so many things. Why did this have to come along and ruin my day? Okay, I will try this. A couple days ago I was playing online matches of a video game against random opponents, and I fought someone whose username was triggering words in Spanish, but I didn't know what they meant. I looked them up afterwards and realized what they were, and tried to forget about them. Today, I said that I would reward myself by watching a movie on my computer if I finished all my work, which I did. But then, as it was nighttime, there was no one else around, and the time for watching the movie was getting nearer, I thought more and more about looking up those triggering words to see what I would find. I had to close the door to my room before starting the movie, and once the door was closed and my computer was open, I did not fight against the temptation any more, looked at porn for close to an hour, and then MO'd. I am so angry that my fantastic day and my experience of the movie, which by itself was very nice, one I remember from my childhood, was tainted and ruined by the experience of PMO right before it. This is causing me so much guilt. My streak was only three days this time! Saturday is the trouble. In the past month I have reset on Saturday 3 times. I think it has to do with the fact that my schedule is different and my day has much less structure. Even though I exercise, I also stay in my room for longer periods of time, and I don't have as much interaction with other people. Now I just have to remind myself that the past doesn't control the future. I relapsed again. It sucked and I hate it, but I can't change it now. This doesn't have to happen again. Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on us!
Wow this is an awesome challenge. I think it's the most detailed description in the OG post. Love the storyline and everything. It makes me want to re-read The Hobbit/LOTR series Maybe I'll buy it on paperback and read through it for fun sometimes I always wanted to be a Hobbit and an Elf. I regularly refer to my basement apartment as a Hobbit hole in the Shire hehe
Home alone is always going to be a challenge for me to. I’d an autopilot that would take me into PMO in those situations. We need to change that autopilot. Like many on here I find a walk outside helps, fresh air and gets the heart pumping. Other thing that works for me in the last weeks is doing push ups or burpees until failure. I actually don’t want to feel horny when I’m home alone now as I fucking hate burpees!!!
Day 13 - The PMO forces were at your tail but you crossed the Ford of Bruinen, leaving them behind. The House of Elrond is in sight! Feeling good (mood). Well I have started my second fast (24 hours) earlier for this week. Gym soon or later. Maybe I will say more later or not. Starting again. Ready, set, go. Completely relatable. This happens when I am fasting but include the boredom for me. Keep strong bro. Sorry for the relapse. Understandable, I get that way when I look at P (intentionally). Then once that happens eventually MO. Full PMO is the results. Because in hard mode there is no looking at P. So my mind works like this, screw it now I have to reset then full relapse for me. Because rules are rules....sometimes I say screw this hard mode rules! No looking at P....etc etc ranting in my words in my mind. Lol I'm still on my Semen retention/NoFap goals still even I haven't done the deed right? Evaluate and strategize for the next time. Every day is not the same even if you have a routine if you know what I mean. Don't do "Autopilot" as well. I'm considerate when I putting my words during my check ins for myself especially for you & some others who are really struggling. Stay strong & keep on going fellowship bro. Inspiring bro. All it takes is internet access, laptop/desktop computer/cell phone and free time. That is the battle. Being all alone then. I look at you and say there is no excuses on my end. Any way, I did what I had to do so hopefully I can catch up to you! Ohh those are the names. Sometimes I do follow Chris Bumstead (Cbum) stuff and exercise posts for knowledge on IG. Inspiration in body building. Nice choices, I have my favorites as well especially since working out is my daily/weekly routine. Amazing streak, keep up the great work Baki! @ARCEUS I believe Baki is right because everyone's recovery is different. Some will take them to 90 - 100 days. Some others will take longer which means a longer streak is required. I could already tell that he is not fully recovered even if he is on 100+ days. Always on my tail these PMO Nazguls. Evading and fighting back. Keep on going Fellowship!
Checking in Fellowship friends! 89 Days Free of PMO. Another day of good sleep, I feel as though fall/winter weather gives me better sleep overall. I had a great workout yesterday, as well as a wonderful exposure session. I have a busy day ahead with work, regardless the intention remains the same as always. Meditation, exposure, workout, reading and work. I'm feeling myself calm again. Stay strong! @Repression Why not try something like Wim Hof breathing first thing in the morning, or perhaps meditation? Replace the bad habit with a good one. @Gallade_Templar Don't beat yourself up brother, it feeds the cycle of relapse. Just say to yourself that you will learn from this mistake. I would suggest trying a blocker, perhaps one that even can block an entire browser from a specific time of day. This may help you get the momentum you need and you can build a different foundation of habits from there. @daddyG1981 Congratulations on reaching elf! @LLOYYD Try reaching out to one of the mods on the forum, it should be there. Not sure why you don't have access to it.
Congratulations on the streak. I’m definitely taking strength from guys like you who are further along. Learning what’s worked and how you’ve managed to stay on track
I think I am going to have to do that then. Because I am going to give up on the DM for now if I can't fix this issue here. Thank you brother for the help.
yeah! Calvin( video editor ) always asks tricky questions from Cbum during the rest time and their conversation is very funny.
Day 1. Did work for 10+ hours today. Feeling tired but good overall. Now spending the evening hours on Uni work. Seeing others on here makes me motivated to keep pursuing a better and healthier lifestyle. Ready to attack a new day tomorrow!
