Day 0, reset to PMO. I'll be honest, I feel like crying. We are eight days into October and I've reset twice. That's once every four days, or basically twice a week. Two years ago I was at a point where I would relapse once every two weeks, not the other way around. I just keep slipping more and more. And the worst part is that I was having such a fantastic day up until I looked at porn. I was being very producting and accomplishing so many things. Why did this have to come along and ruin my day? Okay, I will try this. A couple days ago I was playing online matches of a video game against random opponents, and I fought someone whose username was triggering words in Spanish, but I didn't know what they meant. I looked them up afterwards and realized what they were, and tried to forget about them. Today, I said that I would reward myself by watching a movie on my computer if I finished all my work, which I did. But then, as it was nighttime, there was no one else around, and the time for watching the movie was getting nearer, I thought more and more about looking up those triggering words to see what I would find. I had to close the door to my room before starting the movie, and once the door was closed and my computer was open, I did not fight against the temptation any more, looked at porn for close to an hour, and then MO'd. I am so angry that my fantastic day and my experience of the movie, which by itself was very nice, one I remember from my childhood, was tainted and ruined by the experience of PMO right before it. This is causing me so much guilt. My streak was only three days this time! Saturday is the trouble. In the past month I have reset on Saturday 3 times. I think it has to do with the fact that my schedule is different and my day has much less structure. Even though I exercise, I also stay in my room for longer periods of time, and I don't have as much interaction with other people. Now I just have to remind myself that the past doesn't control the future. I relapsed again. It sucked and I hate it, but I can't change it now. This doesn't have to happen again. Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on us!