Checking in Fellowship Friends! 92 Days Free of PMO. I had a dream where I nearly relapsed, it's interesting how I view this as a nightmare. I'm glad for that to be honest. Apart from that, I slept well last night and ready to take on another day of meditation, exposure, workout, work and reading. I'm trying my best to improve in all parts of my life, in gradual small increments. "Do the thing we fear the most and death of fear is certain." -Ralph Waldo Emerson Stay Strong! @ARCEUS Do not beat yourself up too much brother, learn from your mistake. That is the best present you can give yourself. Also, be proud. You are 16 and are tackling an addiction with which many of us would wish we could of done that so early on in life.
Brother, I have little question for you. Are you a morning person or Night person? . Morning person can do their work easily with more focus in early in the morning . But Night person can only perform well at night. I am Night person. Another thing is please watch below video. It is very helpful to you.
Day 3: PMO forces have spotted you!! With haste you use the Bucklebury Ferry to cross the Brandywine river. Been very busy today. Went to Uni early in the morning, and worked on assignments the rest of the day. No urges whatsoever, another sign that being busy really helps to get your focus on other things.
Day 4 complete! I hope I didn't scare anyone by making such a gloomy post and then disappearing for a few days. I've been on an evangelization trip and I didn't have the time or a convenient way to check the forums. Those three days were a great way to kickstart my new streak, though, and I've continued that today even though there were several temptations to peek. I'm back home visiting my family for a few days, and I have had many falls under this roof. Time to begin the work of balancing that out with some good days! St. Monica, pray for us!
13 days Can't complain. I mean, I am probably heavily triggered but I don't know how to remove the trigger. I usually just endure it for several days or weeks and eventually relapse when the urges get too strong.
End of day 3 I am back. I care for myself again more than this challenge seems a burden. I don't want to associate my sexual desire with the screen and I also feel that porn has a huge influence on my relationship with my wife. I did not feel the later before my latest fall and never felt it in the entire period of our relationship. I hope this will be enough of motivation to not leave this group until I've long defeated this addiction.
I guess you need to work with your mind to make those triggers not trigger you. It's a long process of choosing what you think. But I am not a pro here either
6 days - With rain and fog you enter the old village of Bree. Still in Bree... but the danger is not far away. Strong forces lurk in the fog so better not stray too far from the town.
Day 19 no PM - stay strong fellowship. each day we are clean we are a little bit stronger, wiser and better equipped to deal with what comes next. The battle never stops
I hear you man. You can’t let what’s happened in the past decide what happens now, you almost sound defeated already like a relapse is inevitable. Try to step outside your thoughts, and realise that the trigger is just a thought, but it is not ‘you’ and ‘you’ are in control. I too am triggered and fighting 20-30 triggers every day from people I see, adverts/TV - so I am having this internal conversation with myself constantly. Try to stay positive brother
Porn will be robbing you of full relationships with everyone in your life as it will be pulling at your attention, dominating your desires, and affecting how you can focus and enjoy what’s real. You are right it will be affecting your relationship with your wife and how you view all women. I personally am fighting my subconscious view that all women are a potential conquest, and an object of lust. This is warped thinking I try to beat, caused by over exposure to porn, built up over decades. I am going to practice practice practice thinking differently, and change my perceptions….and so will you
Day 17 I almost slipped on one of my P email messages. Managed to look away on my peripheral. Wow I hate that sometimes. It happened more than once in this journey. I made it and there were other things as well I will say later if I remember. I want to say to others thing about certain people for advice but I will save it for later once my streak is up to a certain degree. @Baki Hanma As he said earlier about a question to ARCEUS, I would say I am a night person. Meaning at night time when no one is around, for some reason I feel more focused. But for some others, it is dangerous area because there is plenty of time to PMO. For me, it depends but not really because I am thinking of other things. I feel I can study/work at night time better especially at home. It's quiet and I can do what I need to do as far as reading and other things goes. So I guess there are few Elfs rank over here. No ones keeps up with the ranks I here I guess. Like it matters because I am keeping myself accountable while others are here as well. One Elf rank has recently fallen @ARCEUS sorry for the recent relapse bro. I am still plugging away and doing whatever I can every day. Gym soon or later. Reading of course around certain sections here in the forums and such. Congrats on starting your food business! Nope it didn't scare me. Just pity from my end. Good to hear you took time off to take that advantage. Stay strong because I'm also struggling a bit here as well. On the journey with the Fellowship to Mount Doom. Keep on going Fellowship!
I am a morning person but I study from 10am to 3am. But there's reason why I study this much. If there is 100 ton pressure in my head due to my pending tasks right now, its 99.9ton created by me by making decision to leave local coaching class for acquiring needed content quality for JEE. Plan is successful but pending syllabus due to that coaching is very much, and many more
Day 4: A brave friend, Tom Bombadil, takes notice of your quest. He teaches you a rhyme to summon him if you fall into danger within his borders. Less busy today. Work, school, and I'm having a party tonight. Normally I'd drink 2-3 times a week (binge) and since alcohol had such negative effects on me (anxiety, bad sleep, less productive, etc.), I began to drink much less. Now I drink maybe once in two weeks. For me drinking has become a social occasion, and drinking less has made me feel much better.
Day 14 no PMO. Back home after a 12 hour flight yesterday. That was a tough day which might make being back “in the real world” even tougher. I’ll do my best to keep my head up today. Good luck to everyone.
