The Lord of the Rings Challenge

hi can you add me to this group?
0 days

 

Day 1

 

Checking in day 1

 

Check in
245.......

 

Relapse...

Last night I stayed up till late and today I have woken up very late and I haven't done anything productive. I have to start following a schedule and being productive, otherwise relapse becomes almost guaranteed.

I feel like I am not giving this recovery the importance it deserves. I know that if I don't overcome this I'm condemning myself to live a worthless life, and that is very scary.

As I have sometimes said before, I must leave the child behind and become the man I want to be, in every aspect of life. I will stop engaging in meaningless escapism and start living a life that I am proud of.

I have written so many messages like this one since I joined the challenge and I don't want to write about my failure anymore. So, I promise myself that this time it's going to be different, this time I'm going to make it.

Today I embark on a journey that will last the rest of my life, a journey in which I will become a star that brings light to this world.
With your help, my fellow brothers and sisters, I'm sure I'll make it.

 

On 6th Feb 2020, I broke my 38 days streak exactly at this time. Now, today is my 39th day again. I will not let the history repeat itself.

 

Day 3: Been a great day so far!

 

Yesterday was day 11! Today’s going to be day 12!

 

Day 3, if I can make it another day this will be my best streak since the start of lockdown! However this sort of feels like cheating, seeing as being ill has been has been essentially an artificial method of minimising urges. Minimising urges due to rewiring my brain and genuinely not wanting to go back to porn is a good goal, minimising urges because I simply don't have the energy to jerk off is certainly not! That said, there were a few hours today where I felt totally fine; yet right now I feel worse than ever. Instead of getting better or worse this virus seems to be going both directions at once depending on the time of day!

 

Day 44 check-in

 

I wish you a good recovery from both the virus and the addiction. Stay strong brother!

 

Day 14, going to be a Hobbit tomorrow.

 

Day 1

 

Relapsed again for the second time.
This morning I received a very sexual message from a girl I slept with before the quarantine. I MO after that without porn.

Back to day 0. This time I will not fail!

 

This is day two for me.

 

Day 4: Really tired today. Need to stay focused though. Boredom and exhaustion can lead to a relapse. Motivated to stay strong though!

 

@RiseToGreatness I would like to join the quest to save Middle Earth and myself from the Evil that is porn.

I have completed 108 days without P or M so I guess that makes me a Grey Wizard.

All the best and may your hearts stay true on this path