The Lord of the Rings Challenge

Fuck. I relapsed again. I think I need to take more drastic measures.

 

Hello everyone!
This is day 8
@RiseToGreatness please update my rank to uruk-hai

Success tips
Meditation : it prevents you from going autopilot, increases power of your conscious mind on unconscious mind, reduces hypofrontality. I constantly meditated in these 8 days.. Sometimes mind was focused, sometimes wandering but it really helped in my streak
IN MY LAST ATTEMPTS I USED TO RELAPSE ON THE DAY I DIDN'T MEDITATE( like three days i did meditate I would have three day streak if i won't meditate on fourth day it was reset). This continued for months

2) prayers and connecting to God asking for his guidance, reading scripture ..
If you are atheist that you can connect to any human you idealize, or science

3) working on your emotional wounds
I use rational emotive behavioral therapy(REBT).. It helps move forward from your traumatic past.
I would also suggest you to remove toxic people from your life because
YOU CANT HEAL IN SAME PLACE YOU WERE HURT. Surround your self with positive people

4) maintain a journal :
Where you can write your feelings
before and after relapse,
Before and after resisting pmo
Before and after meditation
Before and after workout
Or any positive quote you come across

I am really happy to go this far

 

Day 16
: )

 

31 days achieved.

 

Day 5: My car is at the body shop getting some work done, so I will be without a vehicle and home alone most of the weekend. Every relapse I've had over the past few months happen on either Saturday or Sunday. I'm going to need to stay strong and vigilant, because I'm not going to be able to leave the house if / when urges hit. It's going to be a huge challenge. Just need to stay focused and stick to the plan.

 

Day 35

 

Day 2

I never got around to posting yesterday, and while it was a bit of a down day, I did not have urges. I had a really good therapy appointment. We discussed my mindset during my relapse a well as the fact that I made the conscious choice to look at porn and masturbate instead of fighting the urge. I had just given in, and I was engaging in behavior that I knew would lead to relapse, but I did not care. There was no excuse for what I did, but my therapist (who in the past has told me that he did not believe I truly wanted to get clean) now sees a change in my behavior and he believes that I am serious about it. That pleases me.

I got up at 6am this morning and my family is on our way to Milwaukee to celebrate my youngest sister’s 21st birthday, so that should be fun. We are going to surprise with a small party with her roommates and best friend in this time of COVID-19.

Feeling really good today. Will be back on tomorrow. Have a good day, all and may you find support inn the fellowship!

Best,
Mathman1994

 

Day 28!

 

Day 4!

 

Sister *

 

Day 0 over...