The Lord of the Rings Challenge

Discussion in 'Events & Challenges' started by RiseToGreatness, Sep 22, 2019.

Should the Thread Title be extended?

Poll closed Jun 21, 2020.
  1. No, leave like that: "The Lord of the Rings Challenge"

    18 vote(s)
    54.5%
  2. Yes. "The Lord of the Rings Challenge: The Fellowship of Nofap"

    15 vote(s)
    45.5%
  3. Yes. "The Lord of the Rings Challenge: Rising Fellowship of Eärendil"

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  4. Yes. "The Lord of the Rings Challenge: The Journey to Mount Doom"

    5 vote(s)
    15.2%
  5. Yes. "The Lord of the Rings Challenge: The Quest of the Ring-bearer"

    6 vote(s)
    18.2%
Multiple votes are allowed.
  1. Day 13 complete!

    This has been a really clean streak for me so far, and I'm very joyful about that. Urges to M are still a problem but I feel as though I'm well on my way to cleansing my brain of the porn that has infected it for 8 years.

    @OttarrTheVendelCrow Russian sounds like a challenge! Do you have experience with Slavic languages?
     
    HE^MAN, Silverwolf, C12345 and 4 others like this.
  2. Ashen One

    Ashen One Fapstronaut

    HE^MAN, Silverwolf, C12345 and 5 others like this.
  3. OttarrTheVendelCrow

    OttarrTheVendelCrow Fapstronaut

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    I actually took Russian in college so I have a pretty good foundation
     
  4. OttarrTheVendelCrow

    OttarrTheVendelCrow Fapstronaut

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    Day 63. Feeling overwhelmed today. I am really feeling the impact of the chaser effect. I am having urges and catching myself wanting to fantasize more. I knew that this wave would come after the wet dream that I had on Sunday night. On top of this, I am still feeling a little bit of PAWS, although it has not been nearly as bad lately. I have been purposefully exposing myself to social situations in order to damper the social anxiety I have been feeling from PAWS.

    Its so important to keep PAWS and the chaser effect in view when on our path to recovery. So far, these have been my biggest obstacles to getting clean and starting a healthy sex life. Both cause the urge to self soothe with masturbation or pornography. They are insidious and seem to come out of no where when you are feeling your best. They represent the valley's of the road we are on. Below is a picture that I find to be a good illustration of what recovery is like in our mind vs. reality. Stay strong brothers!

    upload_2021-2-9_7-15-3.png
     
  5. CrimsnBlade

    CrimsnBlade Fapstronaut

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  6. jaberwaki

    jaberwaki Fapstronaut

    Day 25. I have reached the Watchtower of Amon Sûl! Nearing a month now, and I've found in the past that around 1 month, around 3 months, and around 6 months there are spikes in urges. In the past, the gateway has always been allowing M to come back in, which of course brings fantasizing, which makes it harder to not go fishing, which.... So I'm holding fast to the decision to keep M out of the deal, and that's been feeling good so far. It definitely bothers me since I want to feel like I can have a healthy sexual relationship with myself, but I suppose the alcoholic also wishes he could have a single night cap to end a hard day and well, some things just aren't a good idea.
    As far as the counter debate goes, for me counting days helps get past those first two really hard weeks--when I'm climbing out of the gutter, any hand hold I can grab helps. After that, I'm less concerned about seeing the days as an accumulation of sobriety and more as advanced warning of where I've fallen off the wagon before--"oh, I'm coming up on 30 days, there's usually a spike around now, better be extra vigilant". And this challenge is, I think, a really positive spin on it--it's not just a number, it's a journey, and that gives a sense of progress that I find very rewarding. Again, I don't see it as a goal or a trophy, but more a tool for reflection. And the second it stops being a motivating factor and instead another chain holding me down, it's gone.
     
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  7. MyGodandMyAll27

    MyGodandMyAll27 Fapstronaut

    Day 19. The journey can be hard but it's always worth it to made it
     
  8. Mr. Sinister

    Mr. Sinister Fapstronaut

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    Day 2

    Mixed emotions, but no relapse as a result

    I have become really close friends with a girl from my school and she really has a thing for me

    As many here know, I am not really into women, so there is just a bit of a mildly humorous sexual tension when we are on calls

    Part of me wonders if experimenting would hurt, as she is the only female I have even a mild attraction to

    For example, she has a rather deep voice for a female, and she jokingly uses it to get me going down there

    All in good fun, but I feel undecided on if I would do anything if given a chance

    Any advice? I am not at all intimidated by the possibility, it is different than my usual HOCD stuff
     
  9. RiseToGreatness

    RiseToGreatness Fapstronaut

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    well, honestly, this clash against personal values. for me, i won´t have trouble with that, and just have sex with her. but if you´re truly commited to stay abstinence until marriage, then it´s pretty much hard mode for you. on the positive side you´ll gain much more power and confidence much faster. but on the downside, the urges can become stronger.

    so, rule of thumb, never encourage lust in your mind, never. try to be mindful of those thoughts, don´t dwell on them, because sexual thoughts fuel urges and promotes objectification. even about her. also try to avoid any sexual stimulation that you both might have with each other. try to keep it light and on the romantic side :)

    practice physical exercise and take cold showers on a regular basis.

    and that´s it ;). needless to say that you must avoid all kinds of sexy material since that also fuels urges (and pmo) ;)
     
  10. RiseToGreatness

    RiseToGreatness Fapstronaut

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    You´re doing great bro, but take care. don´t push yourself too much. face your fears in the limit that feels confortable for you. stretch it bit by bit, as long as you feel confortable. if you´re facing situations that you´re not ready to face, then the fear and anxiety can become overwelming.

    be gentle with yourself brother, follow your natural flow :)
     
  11. RiseToGreatness

    RiseToGreatness Fapstronaut

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    thanks bro, that´s the point :)
     
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  12. RiseToGreatness

    RiseToGreatness Fapstronaut

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    well, your age is the age of experimentation, there´s no rule about that. so do as you feel ;). but i suggest you let it flow and see what happens.

    just be aware than on the addiction side all kinds of sexual stimulation are dangerous for you, since they will increase urges and in turn create greater risks of pmo.
     
    Last edited: Feb 9, 2021
    Silverwolf, C12345 and Mr. Sinister like this.
  13. RiseToGreatness

    RiseToGreatness Fapstronaut

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    Checking in with my new rank Fellowship :)

    [​IMG]

    No objections so far, so i thank your support :)

    About the counter, there´s several feedback of brothers supporting the counter and the challenge, so indeed one size does not fit all :D. so once again, i encourage brothers to follow their own paths and implement the strategies that works best for them. my exception is not an exception, any one who wishes to join the Fellowship but doesn´t want to take the journey, are free to do so. The power of the group is very positive and it´s a mutual benefit for all :)

    So, let´s get going ;)

    The following brothers have upgraded and reach places in Middle Earth. Congratulations!!! :)

    @Toni7 - Uruk-Hai
    @Ashen One - Hobbit / Hobbiton (your journey has started my brother :). Good luck!!! )
    @MyGodandMyAll27 - Buckleberry Ferry / Shire
    @jaberwaki - Amon Sûl / Eriador
    @Strugglingforyears @OttarrTheVendelCrow - Anduin River / Wilderland

    Have a great day brave Fellowship!!! :)

    Continuing with easy_peasy.


    "Chapter 9 Health

    This is the area where the brainwashing is the greatest with users – particularly the young and single – who think they’re aware of the health risks but aren’t. Many kid themselves by saying they’re prepared to accept the consequences. If your internet router had a function that played an alarm tone with a warning when you hit a porn site saying – “Up –until now you’ve gotten away with it, but if you stay another minute your head will explode.” Would you have stayed? If you’re in doubt about the answer try walking up to a cliff, standing on the edge with your eyes closed and imagining having the choice of either quitting porn or walking up blindfolded.

    There’s no doubt what your choice would be, but by burying your head in the sand and hoping that you’ll wake up one morning and not want to watch porn anymore, you accomplish nothing. Users cannot allow themselves to think of the health risks, if they do the addiction’s illusory enjoyment goes. This explains why shock treatments are so ineffective in the first stages of quitting, it’s only non-users who bring themselves to read about the destructive brain changes.

    Take this common conversation with users, generally younger ones.

    Me: “Why do you want to stop?”

    User: “I read in a pick-up artist’s blog that it’s good to stop for four days to amp myself up.

    Me: “Aren’t you worried about the health risks?”

    User: “No, I could step under a bus tomorrow.

    Me: “But would you deliberately step under a bus?”

    User: “Of course not.

    Me: “Do you not bother to look left and right when you cross the road?”

    User: “Of course I do.

    Exactly, they go through a lot of trouble not to step under a bus and the odds are thousands to one against it happening. Yet the user risks the near certainty of being crippled by their addiction and appears to be completely oblivious. Such is the power of the brainwashing, internet porn is a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Isn’t it strange that if we felt there was the slightest fault in an airplane we wouldn’t go up in it – even though the risks are millions to one – yet we take more than a one-in-four certainty with porn and are apparently oblivious to it? What does the user get out of this? Absolutely nothing!

    Another common myth is depression or peevishness. Many younger people aren’t worried about their health because they don’t suffer any of the depression or melancholy. The depression or stress isn’t the disease, it’s a symptom. Younger people in general don’t feel the irritability or depression created due to their body’s natural ability to produce more dopamine. As they age or lives encounter serious setbacks, their already depleted resources are overworked and they’ll experience full blown symptoms. When older users feel stressed, depressed or irritated, it’s because nature’s fail safe mechanisms are protecting the nervous system from excessive dopamine flooding through trimming receptors. The user also develops other neurological changes that keep them in the rut.

    Think of it this way, if you had a nice car and allowed it to rust without doing anything about it, that would be pretty stupid. It would quickly become an immovable heap of rust, incapable of transporting you anywhere. However, it wouldn’t be the end of the world as it’s only a question of money. But your body is the vehicle that carries you through life. We all say that our health is our greatest asset, ask any sick millionaire. Most of us can look back on an illness or accident in our lives where we prayed to get better. By being a porn user, you’re not only letting the rust get in and doing nothing about it, you’re systematically destroying the one vehicle used to go through your entire life.

    Wise up. You don’t have to do this, remember, it’s doing absolutely nothing for you. Just for a moment, take your head out of the sand and ask yourself that if you knew with certainty that your next session would start a process that would make you utterly unresponsive to someone you deeply love, would you continue using? Speaking to the people this happens to, they certainly didn’t expect it would happen to them either, and the worst thing isn’t the disease itself but the knowledge that they’ve brought it on themselves. Try to imagine how people who’ve ’hit the button’ feel, for them the brainwashing is ended. They spend the remainder of their lives thinking, “Why did I kid myself for so long that I needed to masturbate to internet porn? If only I had the chance to go back!

    Stop kidding yourself, you have that chance. It’s a chain reaction, if you engage in the next porn session, it’ll lead you to the next one and the next. It’s already happening to you. Easy_Peasy promises no shock treatment so if you’ve already decided that you’re going to stop, the following won’t be shocking for you. If you haven’t, skip the remainder of this chapter and come back to it once you’ve read the rest of the book.

    Volumes upon volumes of research have already been written about the damage internet porn causes to our sex lives and mental well-being. The trouble is that until deciding to stop they don’t want to know. Forums and mentor groups are a waste of time because porn puts the blinders on. If inadvertently read, the first thing they do is to open their favorite tube site. Porn users tend to think of the happiness, stress and sex hazards as a hit-and-miss affair, like stepping on a land mine.

    Get it into your head, it’s already happening. Every single time you open your porn site you’re triggering dopamine flooding and opioids get to work. The neural water slides are greased and the ride takes you smoothly through the next steps, your brain having already given in to the script. The nervous system is now flooded by dopamine and since it’s the umpteenth time, dopamine receptors close up and the little monster uses this slight dip in pleasure compared to the last time to drive you further over the red line to more shocking porn or behaviour in order to release more dopamine. More novelty, more dopamine and the little monster tells you to keep going. So many pictures and videos in a single session triggers a supernormal stimulus, injecting more chemicals into the brain and driving you to continue.

    The entire time your receptors are receiving information to shut down in response to the flooding. Orgasm only increases this effect and leads to withdrawal. You’re in denial since the little monster craves for its fix with no real pain and discomfort. The threat of having erectile dysfunction terrifies many, which is why they block it from their mind and overshadow it with the fear of stopping. It’s not that the fear is greater, but quitting today is immediate. Why look on the negative side? Perhaps it won’t happen, having bound to have quit by then anyway."
     
    Last edited: Feb 9, 2021
  14. 12ove

    12ove Fapstronaut

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    Day 5 trod on
     
  15. americanbison

    americanbison Fapstronaut

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    You and your girlfriend are sharing a value, and that means a ton in a relationship. Lustful thoughts don't care about values or relationships. It's kind of the core problem with pornography. I've justified pursuing a lustful fantasy by the excuse, "it's my wife/girlfriend, so it's different!" It's never been different. It's just a familiar mask over the same feelings.

    Why not practice being vulnerable and true to your higher self with your girlfriend?
     
  16. Mr. Sinister

    Mr. Sinister Fapstronaut

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    Will keep that in mind! I feel it's gonna be much easier with HOCD under control, as that is the only thing that has caused me to relapse. Will be on guard, however.
     
  17. C12345

    C12345 Fapstronaut

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    Day 1 complete yet again. I will beat this
     
  18. OttarrTheVendelCrow

    OttarrTheVendelCrow Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for this @RiseToGreatness. I definitely pushed it too far at one point. I really do need to be more gentle with myself and slow down. I can feel myself getting out over my skis.
     

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