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Discussion in 'Events & Challenges' started by RiseToGreatness, Sep 22, 2019.
I just realized that I am at Rivendell and has turned into an Elf ! ...meditated, cold shower, long walks
and now I am having some elvish dinner !
That is the life brother! closer and closer each day
Day 4! pretty busy with bureaucracy and I'm trying to find a stable lifeline. No Urges as I have all these responsibilities I am tending as they arise so no excess energy left after all these and the work day. I am getting closer to my goals however which is a pleasant feeling!
Cold showers are a go to as always, meditation is still lacking though, staying active is on point yet I need to enforce some new habits soon when I'll move back on being on my own!
Feeling more hopeful and more energized. I joined a writing group online through my university. I just took a two hour break for lunch and a walk and am about to get back to work.
I've been praying throughout the day. Still need to meditate. Skipped my shower today. I will workout with weights either tonight or tomorrow.
"You will be alone with the gods..." Wow, what an inspiring line! Thanks @RiseToGreatness !
Brother today is not over yet and meditation with shower are more valuable in our journey than weights.
Very beautiful and such a powerful and important message. Thanks for sharing.
One step towards the journey.
Just checking in
No PMO 2 days. Bring me the day 3. I had a trigger today, I managed to get over it, no edging, no porn. I'm only 2 days old, but I feel happy to have a little achievement
Got to work out and play some tennis today as well as do some of my part time job. It was nice to have the business and to get to be able to do these things I love. Feeling good today. But I gotta slow down and take some time to think and have some reflection.
Heyyy its my 7 day with Pmo, thankful... It's not a very easy journey but am glad am on this road.... I felt the urge to take a look at whats going on P but I remember this site and that's what kept me in line.... So what's do you know this website really helps.... So am uruki-hai
Day 3. a lot of thoughts about PMO and how to do it, but staying strong and not giving them the oportunity to become true, keeping avoiding the electronic devices on private areas. There's a long way to Mordor and i have to resist the journey step by step
Day 1 is complete.
Okay, I said I would make a post about my relapse yesterday. I made it six days, which shamefully is longest I've gone in a while, and I was still feeling good. I got a couple hours of work done in the morning, then went for a long run before lunch. After that I did a cold shower and had a protein-heavy meal, and I was feeling so energized by that point that I was practically bouncing in place. I knew a lot of it was sexual energy, the kind of thing that inspired relapses. What I didn't know was how to get rid of it constructively, so I reached out to my AP and he suggested pushups. I did fifty, and that helped for a bit, but the urges and the energy kept coming back. I tried everything I could think of: reading, creative writing, meditative prayer, watching some anime and YouTube, doing the dishes, walking the dog, talking to my AP again, more pushups. I did a total of 110 pushups that day but it felt like for all the energy I burned, twice as much came back. By late evening I could not hold back any more and so I masturbated to orgasm. Then about an hour later I went and did it again, because the drive had still not dissipated and I felt so pent up and ready to burst from fighting the urges all day. Two relapses in one day is not who I want to be. I mean, any relapse in any number of days is not who I want to be, but this was especially out of control. And I still don't know what I could have done differently to avoid the situation.
Starting a new streak on the same track, hoping and praying things will somehow be different.
I knew it was coming. Last couple of days my mind is filled with intimacy , even my body is inclining towards P . I REALLY REALLY REALLY DONT WANT P EVER !!!. The urges are hard and finally resorted to M. Because I REALLY DON'T WANT P, I know its filthy consequences. I know M is bad too, I will try my best and I can also see improvement.
But...Sorry for letting you guys down.
Congratulations on 100!
Day 66 check-in (Attempt 4) -
The Gates of Argonath, The Pillar of Kings.