The myth of beautiful women being approached and complimented all the time - What's the real truth?

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by faplordxd, Jun 24, 2017.

  1. The_Monk

    The_Monk Guest

    Each and every sexual crime is just because of porn and some mentally retard pathetic men. My blood boils by hearing such cases..
  2. YYZed

    YYZed Fapstronaut

    I think I'm a pretty attractive guy, but I'm 5'6" and weigh about 150 lbs, I'm baby faced and cant grow a full beard so I'm 30 but I look like I'm 20. So if I approach a woman my age she automatically disqualifies me because of how I look. Once a girl gets to know me it's a different story, but damn does this hurt my confidence. I started lifting weights for the sake of my health and to compensate a little for my height. In truth it shouldn't bother me so much, but it seems most women have strict height preferences, must be an evolutionary thing.

    I've been alone for about as long as my last relationship, about 3 years, it's been really hard. I have no confidence in approaching women and honestly, looking young for a guy is a curse. 20 year old girls want to date older guys, and even though I look 20 I don't want to date 20 year olds, I want someone my own age. I don't think you guys have it so bad. I can't even get any game online, I get approached by women who are like 300 lbs or just blatenly unattractive to me. I've kicked the porn habit but damn it's impossible to not masturbate when you haven't even held another females hand in 3 years. Really I think I'm just going to go I'm going to keep trying, just need that confidence.
  3. PlasticBoy

    PlasticBoy Fapstronaut

    This is so disgusting, i cant believe that it is happening :/
  4. The Peace Warrior

    The Peace Warrior Fapstronaut

    Welcome to the real/cruel world..
  5. Kenzi

    Kenzi Fapstronaut

    No, disqusting is when you take your kids to a pizza birthday party and when a little league team is Also there getting trophies and you go up to get drinks with your stepson and a 10/11 years old kid decides to grind up on you in line!
    I Literally grabbed his hands said "put your arms out-good - THIS - is line etiquette. You stand no closer than This"
    He was Sooo shocked I grabbed him!
    But you don't do that to someone!
    His two little buddies were shocked too.
    And guess what?
    I know my kid heard everything they were saying. (the conversation just before the incident)
    I'm not thrilled about it either.
    It's embarrassing.
    I don't need my step/kids thinking things about me like that.

    My SO likes to say "she's not bad, she's just drawn this way"

    If you don't teach your kids how to interact, then the tv/video games/their friends /crazy uncle whatever will.

    Every single interaction you have with someone matters.
    These days as those interactions are less and less with people and online more and more....
    Food for thought.
    Mixtec likes this.
  6. WankMaster

    WankMaster Fapstronaut

    It's so funny, all guys want to do is meet girls and all girls want to do is meet guys

    Neither of us can do it so we will just discuss online
    Mixtec and Kenzi like this.
  7. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

    So I'm female with a partner with PIED. I think at least in my 20s and early 30s I would be described by most as very attractive. I am not chopped liver now lol and I still get a good bit of attention but I don't look like I did then. When I online dated I would get around 30 or more emails a day everyday my inbox would sometimes get so full it would stop accepting messages. so yea sure I got attention. 95% commented on my looks and said something like you are too pretty and that be on here what's wrong with you? About 20% read my profile and that was about the same percentage that gave a crap about anything beyond my looks. Offline yep I got cat called out or cars, had men creepily follow me around public places, got physically grabbed at bars, sexually harassed by coworkers but in 40 years of life maybe 10 guys have ever cold approached me and struck up a conversation. Two ended up being long term partners of mine and I will always talk to anyone unless you are rude. People assumed because I was attractive I was a bitch. Women do too! Not just men. Oh she's so hot she must be a bitch. Did you ever hear the saying the prettiest girls are always sitting at home dateless? It's so true. Men don't ask us out because they assume we are taken or will shoot them down. The men that do are usually huge players because they have the ego to do it. And we get burned. When we do approach men and show interest we almost always have the hit them over the head to get them to see we like them! Then when they date us they feel insecure the entire time and it kills the relationship. And we get used for sex a lot! So sure when I walked into a room did men turn their heads? You bet. Did any every try to approach me? Far and few between.
    faplordxd likes this.
  8. Do not assume a beautiful woman on the outside doesn't have a brain. Very few are bubble brains.
    GG2002 and Tesslynne like this.
  9. noonoon

    noonoon Fapstronaut

    I guess you might say i'm a success story in this case. My wife was way prettier than i deserved. But, I went through a phase in college where I just didn't care anymore. I treated it as a game to approach women, to flirt, to have fun with it. I stopped caring and started doing really well on the dating scene.
    I remember one time after we had got serious I visited some friends i hadn't seen in a long while at a party. My GF and I were there together but were socializing on different sides of the room. Some of my friends wouldn't believe me that she was my girlfriend! Ha! You'd think i'd be insulted? Nah. I loved it. I know i'm a 6 and she's a 9. I'm proud of it too.
  10. Tesslynne

    Tesslynne Guest

    Do you think it would be a bad thing for a WOMAN to act like you did???
  11. Tesslynne

    Tesslynne Guest

    Can relate to parts of this.
    Most of it no but yes at one stage on plenty of fish not 30 a day, but two emails a day lol. But I didn't find any of them remotely attractive. When I was younger I had the women being jealous thing too, being bitchy and assuming I was out to steal their boyfriends! Even though I wasn't! Getting asked out by the players and used for sex too. I feel you!

    I guess I have it in my head that beautiful women get asked out on romantic dates more but maybe that's not even true!
  12. noonoon

    noonoon Fapstronaut

    Unfortunately, there is a double standard when it comes to men and women. If an attractive woman approached a man of lesser attractiveness, I think that'd work awesome. But vice versa? I don't think it'd work. If my wife approached me back then i'd have been stoked. But she wouldn't have.
    My advice to you would be to lower your standards for physical attractiveness and increase them on the moral/financial attractiveness side.
    Yes, I'm unapologetically sexist.
  13. Tesslynne

    Tesslynne Guest

    And yet nobody would EVER say THAT to a man

    And yet you guys think YOU have it worse.

  14. Tesslynne

    Tesslynne Guest

    Every single NoFap guy who complains that women have it better, READ this, above.

    Read it.

    Everyone tells you you CAN go for those 10s but we can't.

    How the FUCK am I supposed to feel right now?

    And you can approach whoever the FUCK you actually WANT to. You may get rejected but at least you won't get stonewalled by society for actually TRYING.

    Fuck I HATE being a woman SO MUCH right now!!!
  15. noonoon

    noonoon Fapstronaut

    You can go for whoever you want. We live in the most open and diverse society the world has ever known (if you're in a wester european country). You can go for them, but most likely, you'll get the brush off.

    What to do??

    Well, I actually give all my single male friends the same advice - change your standards.
    Singles often complain about being alone, but you ask them about this or that person, and they say, "oh, their nice, but too short". or too fat, or too whatever.

    What they often really want is arm candy - someone society says is a ten. Change your definition of what a "ten" is and you'll do well. There are a lot of guys with a "ten" moral character and a "five" appearance.

    Make a new "ten" based on different standards and you'll enjoy life much more.
    GG2002 likes this.
  16. I will win

    I will win Fapstronaut

    Heheheheh, this thread turned into a war.
  17. I have never settled for anything in my life I'm not starting with my future Mrs.
    Tesslynne likes this.
  18. Tesslynne

    Tesslynne Guest

    Nor I with my future Mr --- respect ✊
  19. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

    This made me think of something I experienced on online dating. See I have a theory that 10% of women are getting 90% of the emails. So what happens is that when men online date they suddenly all think they should have a 10 even though if they saw that woman in real life they would never approach her because they think she's outta their league. So they get pissed and don't understand why no one ever answers her and then presume she's not responding to them based on their looks. How dare she judge me for my looks? But yet the guys are judging the women by their looks? I usually tell my male friends only email women online that you would actually approach in real life and realize that of the woman is really hot to you chances are she is to a lot of men and you gotta stand out among the 10s that email her . So if you prefer online dating use that test. There are lots of 6s and 7s that get one message from guys a week and then there are hundreds of dudes trying to get the attention of five women. The opposite is true in real life dating. Men are more inclined to approach a 7 or 8 than a 10 so if average looking guy approaches that same girl who ignores him online he's got a much better shot because he's likely one of the only guys that will.
    I used to think like you as well lots of single people do. I know what I'm looking for and I'm not settling was my mantra. I am not telling you to settle just open your mind to the fact that you could find love to someone who is not traditionally your type. Relationships are about 20% chemistry and the rest compatibility which has nothing to do with looks. Even the 20 year old 10 will get old, gain weight, and not look the same at age 50. So you have to have something more there. It's like looking for a needle in a haystack when you set out certain criteria for a partner. Will you find it? Maybe. There is folklore that others have but it's unlikely. A lot of people using this criteria push themselves right out of every good relationship.
  20. The woman I am currently seeing has degrees from Columbia and Penn once of which is a PhD. She used to model and her intellect and beautiful heart match her looks. I do not accept average as a goal in any part of my life. The last place I would ever consider it is in a spouse. I've worked hard and deserve better than average. If that sounds arrogant fine I can live with that label from others if they guy looking back at me in the mirror knows the truth and is proud of the guy in the mirror.

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