The One Month Dream

Hi guys, I've been going through a lot of shit lately and I just wanted to share my experiences while getting some feedback and opinions. I'll do my best to summarize everything and get straight to the point.

2017 I was supposed to lose my virginity for the first time, I had a limp dick and got hard during the blow job but couldn't maintain penetration. I found out about the PIED community and did a one month reboot. Got a handjob after a month, successfully came. Started PMO again, thinking I could do this in moderation this time. One month later, hooked up with a girl in my class, was hard but had no condom for sex; she was annoying though because she didn't want to give me a handjob or blowjob so it was just fingering I guess. Hooked up with her again, had a condom this time, but during the fingering, I went soft and I couldn't get hard again since she didn't want to touch my dick (she has a fear of dicks and will only let guys fuck her). I ditched the girl and started nofap again, a month later, had a bj but had DE, no sex since this girl was on her period. A week later, she came back and I was able to penetrate for a bit but then lost my erection. The girl got insecure and we stopped. I continued on with the nofap to the best of my ability, had streaks of 2 weeks, then I had sex with another girl and I was successful, lasted about 5 minutes haha. I continued with this girl and did it again, she had to go out of the country so I started pmoing again for a week (daily). Met up with her again and got hard to put the condom on but was going soft at the same time, she sucked me off and got me hard again but by the time she got under I lost my erection, I took my time and rubbed my dick around her vagina to get hard again, I did get hard but I came inside the condom before I could even penetrate. (Last time I had sex with her).

One month later of no PMO, I got a blowjob from another girl and I successfully came from the blowjob, I was so happy because I stayed hard throughout and didn't need to finish myself. I let it escalate and started PMOing again from about May - June 2019. Stopped PMOing for about a month again starting the end of june. In July I started dating this girl and we've been doing long distance, we saw each other for three days and had a lot of oral sex but no penetration because she wasn't ready, to my surprise I stayed hard throughout everything, even when I was fingering or eating her out, I was 100% sure that I had no PIED because I could literally feel how hard my dick was. Now we're back to long distance and I wont see her till December 18 2019, I started PMOing again from October to the beginning of November, daily (sometimes more than once or twice a day). I started NoFap again on November 05, but I've noticed my porn addiction is worse, I am actively looking for pornstars and just porn, I've had a few times in which I got caught in the moment and almost jacked off to porn but I was able to stop myself.

I'm really afraid that my PIED wont be cured in about a month to finally have sex with my girlfriend. I don't do nofap for the benefits (although they're really nice), I do it because I want to have a healthy sex life.

Anyways, I'll update you guys on how the journey goes from here till December.
Feel free to give me feedback and your opinions!

 

That’s the plan man! But I’m seeing my girlfriend in December, and we really want to try. I think I’ll be able to do it and be cured with one month hard mode, I’m just glad to know she understands my problems and is willing to help.