The real reason you are developing yourself

today dear friends i want to analyse the rigth and real meaning of self-improvemnet
think about it why do you want to improve yourself ?
why are you doing all this?
why are you putiing a lot effort trying to improve yourself?
I always was a kid with no self esteem and generarly a shy kid
i was nice and kind always,i was the calm kid which believes in values.
Then somethinh happen in my life a bad situation when i was 11 years old
family issue i will not analyse but this is what you need to know
this problem had changed my life, i became angry, with a lot of rage. I became more shy
not social,but at least i had my friends and my family. I was going through a lot but i never give up i had to support my family with this issue
and i did it but i was not helping my self only others and in the end i became a fussy person with a lot of insecurities
I started porn when i was 14 years old and my life was ok because things got better and better with time but my sexual life was mess i was watching porn but i did not want it, i couldnt forgive my self for what i did. When i was finish with porn then after seconds the guilts where huges and i was preying and preying.
i was trying to heal from this things for 2 years but i could not quit porn.
In school i had a lot firends and girls friends ,actually i was a good talker for gilrs but with no confidnce,that is why they were seen me just like a friend.
my life was good but i was not happy i had it all but i was not happy again
i couldnt find a gilrfriend but the real problem was that i didnt have the self esteem and the confidce to meet new people.
I dicides to do the change i decided to join nofap cummonity, i was very excited that i find this movement and finally i did it i was in no pmo for 2 months
my life was changed for real now i am happy with all i would not analyse the changes i had this is for a different post
what i am trying to say is that i did this improvement to be better person for the world
and not just for