The reason why you should masturbate

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by StreetLight, Jun 15, 2016.

  1. @Red Eagle

    1. The reason why I stayed away from NoFap.com for a time is because of religious lunatics like you who think masturbation is a practice of the devil or something.

    A. Where did he say something like that?

    B. Did you consider the possibility that maybe someone is trying harder and for longer period than you do, therefore they do know more about the topic?

    2. Nobody gets hurt, one person feels pleasure and relaxed after the act.

    You get hurt... (energy drops, anti-social, not-concentrated, weak)

    3. While I agree that overmasturbation is unhealthy I don't see the damage in doing it now and then.

    So how much is okay and how much is too much... :)

    4. M won't turn you gay. Being gay is completely natural and there is nothing wrong with it. How is it supposed to turn a teen gay anyway?

    Well, masturbation with porn can actually turn you gay (or at least gay curious, Coolidge effect remember?)

    5. And even if it was right, we should then encourage teens to masturbate, so they will turn gay so we can stop the over population problem.

    Overpopulation? Well, I can see that the native population in Germany is decreasing...

    6. I'm really thinking of leaving the NoFap forums behind. NoFap seems to attract to many extremists in many ways.

    Extremists? Pretty cool that everyone with different opinion is an Extremist... :) You sound almost like Angela... (Daughter of Christian Priest btw)

    //

    Dude, I gave you honest answers...

    On the other hand, you seem like a good guy just trying to communicate your opinion in a good faith so that it will be helpful to others...

    Let me do the same...

    7. Check for Matt Fradd or Jason Evert on Youtube.

    (I understand that you are not religious, but hey, I took a time to read your comment so I think it would be a good courtesy to do the same;-))

    Watch one of those 1 hour videos on Porn Addiction & Recovery.
    (give it 10 min and watch further if you like it...)

    Those guys are funny and it is also very informational indeed. Maybe it will show you a different point of view on the issue.

    Good Luck and God Bless!
     
  2. Themadfapper

    Themadfapper Fapstronaut

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    [QUOTE="Red Eagle, ] [/QUOTE]


    Have you ever taken a look at the name of the forum you're in? Even in a forum called "NoFap" we got guys telling us to jerk off! Pop psychology is a part of the reason a lot of us are in this mess! Telling us that masturbation and homosexuality are totally healthy and that the feelings of guilt are just due to religious conditioning.

    Physically when you beat off you get hornier. Your testosterone converts to DHT which makes you hornier. Meaning it's highly likely to become habit forming. The sex drive is an extremely strong drive that, IMO, should not be played with. It's not pleasure that drives us to have sex it's a biological impulse that often gets confused with desire and pleasure. Confusing that impulse by jacking off and with porn can really have negative effects upon a person. How many messed up teens do I need to see ruining their youth shut up in their room jacking off, how many adults addicted to jerking off to I need to see before we consider that maybe jacking off is harmful to some people at least?

    People who get addicted to sex turn into zombies and they lose interest and gain little pleasure from other activities even things they normally used to enjoy before their sex addiction. They can lose interest in sports, hobbies things that can really be fulfilling. Even if their not a shut-in, spending all your time having sex [ gay sex] or spending all your time trying to get laid [ at bars] is a very sad fate as well.

    It's a biological impulse to procreate that has been vastly overrated by society with pernicious consequences. I don't think it's healthy for man's greatest desire to be to feel the sensation of orgasm. Cocaine, drug addictions, sensations are not what life is about, IMO and chasing after these things leads to misery. Finding things that you love and are passionate about is a much more satisfying life, IMO.


    I think of a Male Lion when a female is in heat. The male lion doesn't even eat when the female is in heat! If the female stayed in heat all year long the male would die, and consequently, lions would go extinct.
     
  3. DannyCool

    DannyCool Fapstronaut

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    Not even going to look at the op. :)
     
  4. StreetLight

    StreetLight Fapstronaut

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    May I remind everybody to not get personal. This is a heated debate, as we discuss a topic we have deeply rooted believes about and everybody has a strong opinion. There is no 'single right answer'. None the less I believe extremism is never a good idea and we should not hesitate to question our standpoint and listen to what others have to contribute. After all, we are all here together because we share the same goals and to help each other in achieving them.
     
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  5. Brandon2001

    Brandon2001 Fapstronaut

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    Masturbation doesnt turn you gay. OMFG, thats the most retarded thing I've read here.
     
  6. Red Eagle

    Red Eagle Fapstronaut

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    @tyler007
    I'm all for not masturbating especially for people who have a porn addiction. Btw I was never addicted to porn. Before going on NoFap I watched porn on average about once a week which is nothing compared to what others did/do. I stopped because I didn't want porn to be in my life and I think it's unethical and creepy to watch porn. But if you are on a long streak of let's say 60 days and you jerk off without porn and focused on the sensation you shouldn't put yourself down. I have done this and to be honest, I felt great after M. No Guilt, no energy drop, no drop im motivation (it was actually the opposite). What I am trying to say is that if you are on a long streak and jerk off without P there is no big issue. I don't think you undid your progress or did something unethical.
    If you would masturbate and the only person that gets hurt is yourself then I don't see how it is unethical. You could say the same about sex because just like with masturbation you loose your energy. So why is sex not unethical?
    The part about becoming gay when pornography is overconsumed is partly right. I never experienced this but from what I have heard it goes away when rebooting. This just happens because the brain has seen everything that can arouse it that is linked to it's natural sexuality (heterosexuality) and starts changing it's natural taste. But this is a sympton and not a actual change of the consumers sexuality.
    Yes the here in germany (I'm german) the population is decreasing but on a international scale population is increasing.
    And again, there is nothing wrong with homosexuality. It's part of the person just as being heterosexual is part of most of us. By saying that homosexuality is a abomination of that comes out of porn what are you teaching people? Less and less respect for homosexuals. They are just human who deserve respect and not some fucking hardcore porn addicts.

    @Themadfapper
    I actually agree with most of what you say. But read what I answered to tyler007
    I think you shouldn't encourage teens to masturbate but faulting them for doing so is also wrong. They'll start thinking that they are ill or that they have a psychological problem.

    @Brandon1999
    Thanks. At least some people who see the light.
     
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  7. VpK

    VpK Fapstronaut

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    Am a serious addict to MO. I masterbates 3-4 times a day. I want to stop it. And decrease its frequency to 1 per week.
     
  8. dronittti

    dronittti Guest

    I asked for something similar in another recent thread.
    I agree with Red Eagle and StreetLight.
    But maybe we have to make a distinction. I think me, Red Eagle and StreetLight are far ahead on the recovery path than the majority of the people who post here.
    If you're NOT addicted to porn, if you do NOT fantasize obsessively about sex, if you can choose to masturbate or not, if you have a normal social/sexual life, and you're over confidend about having reached this point, maybe you can go back masturbating from time to time. I think natural and healthy ways (not porn-related, then) of giving ourselves physical self-pleasure do exist.

    If you're still addicted to porn, do not masturbate at all. This enforce the porn control and programming of your brain.
    Maybe we just shouldn't discuss this thing here, actually. There a lot of people who are still struggling with porn addiction and sexual masturbation-related problems. And in NoFap's forum this could be a trigger for someone's self-explanations for his/her bad habits.
    Maybe it should be a private conversation, even if I agree with what you're saying.
     
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  9. Red Eagle

    Red Eagle Fapstronaut

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    Yes I agree. There is no sense in keeping this thread going. I think everything that has to be said was already said. For P addicts M is a big no no but for people who have a different relationship with P, M is something entirely different.
     
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  10. Themadfapper

    Themadfapper Fapstronaut

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    I disagree with there being nothing wrong with homosexuality. That is the popular opinion right now, and people get attacked for disagreeing with it, but that doesn't make it true.

    I grew up around a lot of homosexuals and saw an awful lot wrong with it. Aids was a very obvious one, which was rampant in the homosexual community at the time. And I know Aids can affect anyone gay or straight [ why do people say this?] but it is a disease that predominantly affects homosexuals, and if you practice gay sex your chances of getting infected increase astronomically. The disease is mostly passed through being penetrated anally. Very hard for a man who doesn't have gay sex to contract HIV unless he is a junkie, and even then in most cases of infection it's from gay sex.

    Sexual addiction! From what I saw the amount of sex addiction in the gay community was off the charts. Probably the only group I've seen that look more zombified than chronic wankers. Orgies in the parks, sex out on the public streets, and all kinds of perverse fetishes [ like poop eating and worse]

    Guys just get hornier the more they have sex/ejaculate. The amount of sex in the gay community is unhealthy.

    If something can cut your lifespan in half [ disease] and/ or can consume your soul [ sex addiction] I don't think telling people it's healthy and fine is entirely honest.

    I also don't see why you think homosexuals deserve respect, but that hardcore porn addicts don't? You don't want teens to feel guilty about masturbating, but you think porn addicts should be shamed?

    Edit

    I'll just also add that I don't think the poster you quoted ever said homosexuality was an "abomination". I'm not trying to preach to anyone, and if your problem is gay porn or whatever this is a place to get support. I'm simply stating that I don't agree that homosexuality is entirely safe and "healthy" it really isn't a healthy lifestyle statistically at least.


    Anyway, the thread is about masturbation.

    I personally don't enjoy masturbating and feel bad [ energy loss and emotionally] after doing it. I see no reason to do it! Like an addiction I'm doing something I don't want to do if I masturbate.

    If it's something you enjoy and it improves your life [ something I really doubt] then why stop at all? Addictions can be subtle and they talk to us [ in a manner] and tell us they are not so bad, that they can be good and helpful. I once thought speed/meth was benefiting me, but it wasn't it was just the drugs[ or my mind] convincing me to keep using.

    How many people using ecstasy tell you it's a spiritual drug that can enlighten you? I heard it all the time. Every pothead I know thinks the drug has some mystic qualities, lol.
     
    Last edited: Jun 21, 2016
  11. oversexedsami

    oversexedsami Fapstronaut

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    Wow, there is a lot going on in this thread. However, I am only going to respond to the OP for reasons of keeping my sanity lol. I do absolutely agree with you StreetLight. There are some major benefits to be reaped by complete abstinence from MO for males and females as well but for some on NoFap, I have noticed a complete demonization of masturbation as a whole. I have especially noticed this in posts made by males. I have also noticed that most people seem to identify their personal addiction problems lie in viewing pornography and the subsequent masturbation/orgasm that one performs in a state of hyperarousal from this fantasy sexual encounter. Furthermore, many are bothered by their view of women as primarily/only sexual objects and the lack of achieving/maintaining physical arousal with a female. These are all perfectly valid concerns and great reasons to want to go PMO free and abstain from all pornography, masturbation and orgasm. For some, like myself, they are a package deal. Sometimes I would just view video after video for hours, but the end goal was to stay aroused for prolonged periods of time and find the "perfect" clip to finish to.

    Even though they have always been a package deal for me, I do recognize that there exists a complete difference in porn masturbation and self-touch masturbation. The biggest difference is the focus factor; in self-touching the focus is not on a fantasy, a pair of strangers having sex, an image of a woman being brutalized or coerced into hardcore sex for better pay like it is with porn. Self-touch is focus is literally on yourself - on how it feels to touch yourself and explore what feels good. Many individuals begin this self-touch at a young age when first exploring their bodies and it helps us to be comfortable in our own skin, and can even help improve self esteem in addition to relieving sexual tension in adolescence and up.

    There is nothing wrong or immoral about touching yourself; don't let the bad experiences of porn-linked masturbation taint your views on loving your body and your sexuality. Demonizing a beautiful sexual connection between your mind and body is just as harmful as the effect the pornography addiction has on your mind-body connection. Also, your body is for YOU - not just for sex with another person. You are allowed to enjoy stimulating your own genitals. If you're uncomfortable with masturbation because you feel it will cause you to relapse, that is fine too! You know how your mind and body will respond to stimuli because this reboot journey is making you more self aware especially without the porn in your life anymore. All I am asking is that you remember that masturbation in itself, in moderation, is not harmful. As the OP said, it is likely that even when the thought to M arises it will be much more infrequent than before when you were viewing porn. Then, it was a compulsory type activity any time you viewed it whether you were just bored, lonely, wanted to see some nudity or didn't know how to get off without P. In self-touch you listen to your body and what you're truly feeling. It takes more time and patience but it is rewarding. Just like sex with someone special vs porn sex imagery that goes straight into the fucking ;) I also read in a couple of above comments something about masturbation turning you gay? By way of the Coolidge Effect? Uhhh. So many things wrong with that and I said I wouldn't reply to anything other than the original post but come the hell on. First off, re-read what coolidge effect is and how it works within the brain. My guess is, there isn't anything to novel about the dick you've been walking around with for years. Another point: the reason that some become interested in gay pornography is due to the amount of visual extremeness their brains crave in order to peak in sexual arousal through their jaded porn thresholds. Many of these men are not even remotely gay, and this is common in porn addiction just like many of us who have viewed and become entranced by acts we would never engage in ourselves.
     
    Last edited: Jun 21, 2016
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  12. Themadfapper

    Themadfapper Fapstronaut

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    ^I never masturbated much in my youth believe it or not, but I had friends who did a lot and most often it didn't involve porn. A guy I knew became withdrawn, depressed, and basically just stayed in his room playing with himself.

    Your sex drive is there for reproduction, and there is a primal instinct there driving you to do it. If you confuse that drive with jacking off and that same primal drive gets turned toward wanking you can end up with a problem. Chemically in your body when you masturbate some of your testosterone turns to DHT. DHT is what makes you horny [ also causes your hair to fall out] I knew a lot of chronic wankers who had bad problems long before the internet came out. Every hear the Ozzy Osbourne song " no bone movies"? It's about a porn addiction, but still before the internet.

    There are physical benefits to not wanking. Increased energy, stronger healthier body, more confidence, more vitality, a clearer healthier mind. If you stop wanking for 3 months in my case at least pretty much most desire to do it should go away.

    I never had a masturbation problem until in my adult life I got really depressed and had a ton of time on my hands along with the internet. I didn't enjoy wanking and still don't, but I listened to people who said it was natural and the reason I didn't enjoy it was because of sexual repression, and I kept doing it despite not liking it. It never did become enjoyable, but it did become habit forming and I got into watching fetish porn to further increase stimulation as masturbation is very boring right from the get go. I would have watched regular porn but I never found that stimulating at all.

    Now I'm joining a group to help me overcome my porn and to a lesser degree wanking addiction because I listened [ even though I knew better ] to people who told me it was OK and natural to wank.
     
    Last edited: Jun 22, 2016
  13. Cockyau

    Cockyau Fapstronaut

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    There are various nutrients in our sperm (zinc for instance). Once I asked about the body odor problem (particularly, armpits) in a group and a guy pointed out there might be due to deficiency of zinc. And I searched online and found some source stating that our sperm contains zinc and other nutrients, in reddit there's also a post on this, so I can relate that I was fapping too much and it's one of the cause (really too much no jokes). I stopped fap for a 9 days streak and my armpits smell neutral, at least to my nose. Then when I binge on PMO and relapsed the smell will come back. Also besides of odor and lethargy, I sweat too much even though just involve some effortless movements.

    Whatever it is, don't overdo it.
     

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