The side effect of Recovery? Mood Swings, Irritability / short-tempered, etc.

G

gendengwarrior

Fapstronaut
Hello everyone,
So I'm in my longest streak so far, 13 Days, nearly 2 weeks, past week was just great, I've been exercising, meditating, and a little bit of self-care (and of course a lot of sexual thoughts, which I always try to dodge) but out of sudden for the last 2 days I noticed that I've become more prone to Mood Swings, and I cry (actually just get sad, but to the point that I might cry) easily, and the most noticeable are irritability or short-tempered or sensitivity, because today my crush jokingly chatting with me and I took it seriously and forgot that she's just always like that, and then my mind starting to overthink everything and get mad, and sad. Are of these common symptoms form Recovery? or it is just me having a bad day (probably) ?

Also I wanna ask :
Does writing something about sexual fantasy / erotic considered as relapse? because I'm a writer (or maybe I just like to write things) and I always pour down my mind into text, and its not like the oversexualized text like text-porn / porn-stories like that, its more like of a romance scene of two people, but the whole story does not revolve on this romance things, its just a side story or something, but yeah things go sexual and sensual but not overly detailed like text-porn / porn story / adult story..

Thank you for your attention
May Mercy, Love, and Peace be upon you all!!

and please, help me with this.. lol
 
Hiya.
I suppose that happens when we more or less forcefully change our habits, especially revolving around anything addictive. The best you can probably do for yourself is to try and relax through it, let the emotions wash through you and move on. Perhaps consider it a part of the journey that will come to pass with time and patience?
About the writing thing, personally I would be quite careful with that. In my own experience my mind can be a traitor and run free without me when given the chance. So long as it does not get your mind in a space where you know it should not be, feel free to do whatever you find helpful.
Fight on buddy.
 
gendengwarrior said:
Hello everyone,
So I'm in my longest streak so far, 13 Days, nearly 2 weeks, past week was just great, I've been exercising, meditating, and a little bit of self-care (and of course a lot of sexual thoughts, which I always try to dodge) but out of sudden for the last 2 days I noticed that I've become more prone to Mood Swings, and I cry (actually just get sad, but to the point that I might cry) easily, and the most noticeable are irritability or short-tempered or sensitivity, because today my crush jokingly chatting with me and I took it seriously and forgot that she's just always like that, and then my mind starting to overthink everything and get mad, and sad. Are of these common symptoms form Recovery? or it is just me having a bad day (probably) ?

Also I wanna ask :
Does writing something about sexual fantasy / erotic considered as relapse? because I'm a writer (or maybe I just like to write things) and I always pour down my mind into text, and its not like the oversexualized text like text-porn / porn-stories like that, its more like of a romance scene of two people, but the whole story does not revolve on this romance things, its just a side story or something, but yeah things go sexual and sensual but not overly detailed like text-porn / porn story / adult story..

Thank you for your attention
May Mercy, Love, and Peace be upon you all!!

and please, help me with this.. lol
Click to expand...

Do not worry about it, these mood swings are normal part of the recovery. I use to have major mood swings exactly the same as you described them, except without the crying part.

As far as your writing stuff is concerned, it all depends whether the stuff you write makes you feel aroused - arousal essentially means increased dopamine (from unnatural stimulus) and this is not a good thing. You want to eliminate anything artificial as much as possible. However, if when you write your stuff you get the same feeling as if you wrote for example a college essay, then you should be fine.
 
GottaMakeIt said:
Do not worry about it, these mood swings are normal part of the recovery. I use to have major mood swings exactly the same as you described them, except without the crying part.

As far as your writing stuff is concerned, it all depends whether the stuff you write makes you feel aroused - arousal essentially means increased dopamine (from unnatural stimulus) and this is not a good thing. You want to eliminate anything artificial as much as possible. However, if when you write your stuff you get the same feeling as if you wrote for example a college essay, then you should be fine.
Click to expand...

How do you manage to handle the Mood Swings and the Irritability then? and How long it last for you? Does that still happening until now?
 
These are withdrawals and you have to go through them to beat them. Can take months even years to see them completely diminish.
 
I’m starting to notice this too. The past 2 days I was feeling different than usual. Yesterday I was really tired. I usually stay up really late but I couldn’t stay awake and feel asleep. This morning while I was at work I noticed the smallest things started to really irritate me. To the point where I kicked some boxes that were by the back door. It was obvious to everyone I worked with I was in a mood lol. It was bad at first and I felt like I just wanted to yell or to fight the next person to annoy me (honestly could’ve happened as I had very little self control). But once I realized I was on edge all morning something interesting happened. I turned all that anger and determination to be pissed I had inside me and channeled it into my work. I work at a sandwich shop and we got really busy. I managed to get all the closing tasks done in 30 minutes or less (should’ve taken over an hour). My coworkers were complaining while I had this limitless energy. At least it felt that way. I’ve never experienced such raw energy in my life. I told my sister about this after work and told her how it felt like I was an elephant in a small village I was tearing through anything that got in my way. I felt unstoppable. Even my coworkers who usually don’t respect me were taking orders from me as if I was the boss. I can’t make this stuff up! I had no expectations for not jerking off to actually give me this insane drive I felt. I just got into it to cure symtoms of PIED. I assumed the “super powers” stuff was bullsht. I’m starting to change my mind on that. Even this girl at work who constantly disses me and blows me off came up to me and was flirting! I’m hooked on this NoFap thing. Now I just gotta cure this damn PIED
 
dannylomora said:
I see these type of posts all the time. I saw porn for a couple of minutes, I saw a girl dancing n Youtube, I saw a show on HBO of people having sex. Did I relapse? Where did this type of paranoia evolve from............. No it's not a relapse. Recovery is different for everybody, different symptoms, results, etc. Some guys might masturbate a few times in recovery ( hopefully not to porn ) some guys might have lots of sex, etc. If you get this worked up over watching a clip of sex, what will be your mindset in the event you actually do relapse or go on a binge relapsing. Don't get so paranoid of these type of things, the important thing is the overall mentality of no porn/avoiding masturbation ( if there is Porn induced erectile dysfunction ). There will be bumps in the road, that's where you need to fight like hell to beat the urges. You might have to beat the urges 5 times a day, 50 times a week, but those are the battles.
Click to expand...

asik2017 said:
I’m starting to notice this too. The past 2 days I was feeling different than usual. Yesterday I was really tired. I usually stay up really late but I couldn’t stay awake and feel asleep. This morning while I was at work I noticed the smallest things started to really irritate me. To the point where I kicked some boxes that were by the back door. It was obvious to everyone I worked with I was in a mood lol. It was bad at first and I felt like I just wanted to yell or to fight the next person to annoy me (honestly could’ve happened as I had very little self control). But once I realized I was on edge all morning something interesting happened. I turned all that anger and determination to be pissed I had inside me and channeled it into my work. I work at a sandwich shop and we got really busy. I managed to get all the closing tasks done in 30 minutes or less (should’ve taken over an hour). My coworkers were complaining while I had this limitless energy. At least it felt that way. I’ve never experienced such raw energy in my life. I told my sister about this after work and told her how it felt like I was an elephant in a small village I was tearing through anything that got in my way. I felt unstoppable. Even my coworkers who usually don’t respect me were taking orders from me as if I was the boss. I can’t make this stuff up! I had no expectations for not jerking off to actually give me this insane drive I felt. I just got into it to cure symtoms of PIED. I assumed the “super powers” stuff was bullsht. I’m starting to change my mind on that. Even this girl at work who constantly disses me and blows me off came up to me and was flirting! I’m hooked on this NoFap thing. Now I just gotta cure this damn PIED
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Damn dude that such a miracle isn't it, I guess in my story, I converted the energy to body excercise, never been this motivated to get sweat tho... Keep on persevering pal!
 
gendengwarrior said:
Hello everyone,
So I'm in my longest streak so far, 13 Days, nearly 2 weeks, past week was just great, I've been exercising, meditating, and a little bit of self-care (and of course a lot of sexual thoughts, which I always try to dodge) but out of sudden for the last 2 days I noticed that I've become more prone to Mood Swings, and I cry (actually just get sad, but to the point that I might cry) easily, and the most noticeable are irritability or short-tempered or sensitivity, because today my crush jokingly chatting with me and I took it seriously and forgot that she's just always like that, and then my mind starting to overthink everything and get mad, and sad. Are of these common symptoms form Recovery? or it is just me having a bad day (probably) ?

Also I wanna ask :
Does writing something about sexual fantasy / erotic considered as relapse? because I'm a writer (or maybe I just like to write things) and I always pour down my mind into text, and its not like the oversexualized text like text-porn / porn-stories like that, its more like of a romance scene of two people, but the whole story does not revolve on this romance things, its just a side story or something, but yeah things go sexual and sensual but not overly detailed like text-porn / porn story / adult story..

Thank you for your attention
May Mercy, Love, and Peace be upon you all!!

and please, help me with this.. lol
Click to expand...
Completely normal, I've been going through it for a while. Number 1 thing to remember is that when you feel horrible like this, its only temporary and is just your mind freaking out because its not getting what it wants. Think of it as a kid throwing a tantrum.

Last Monday I was damn near suicidal, I felt horribly worthless and saw nothing but bad in my future. The past 3 days I've been the exact opposite and have been in a great place mentally. Actually some of my best days in the past few months when it comes to mental state. But now today im a bit low again, not horrible but not great.

Its all just withdrawal and it will pass. That's really a key thing to remember, it will pass, you're not in your right mind during the horrible moments and the things you're thinking are being blown out of proportion. When I remember that it helps me to calm down and not feel so hopeless. Especially after I've been through it so many times so I know for a fact from 1st hand experience that it does pass.

As for the writing thing, it scares me that you would even ask that question of "Is it a relapse" so please read this: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/seven-days-now-what.183685/#post-1566190

Of course its not a relapse, that's not even a question, but it might be slowing down the recovery. If all you're doing is writing then its no big deal but make sure you're not lying to yourself and really just doing it because it turns you on or even worse, fantasizing about it. But if its really just honest writing then don't worry.

Anyway, stay strong man! Push through those shitty feelings and know there's light on the other side. Try practicing meditation if you don't already, it helps a lot with this kind of thing. Good luck man!
 
JJackson said:
Completely normal, I've been going through it for a while. Number 1 thing to remember is that when you feel horrible like this, its only temporary and is just your mind freaking out because its not getting what it wants. Think of it as a kid throwing a tantrum.

Last Monday I was damn near suicidal, I felt horribly worthless and saw nothing but bad in my future. The past 3 days I've been the exact opposite and have been in a great place mentally. Actually some of my best days in the past few months when it comes to mental state. But now today im a bit low again, not horrible but not great.

Its all just withdrawal and it will pass. That's really a key thing to remember, it will pass, you're not in your right mind during the horrible moments and the things you're thinking are being blown out of proportion. When I remember that it helps me to calm down and not feel so hopeless. Especially after I've been through it so many times so I know for a fact from 1st hand experience that it does pass.

As for the writing thing, it scares me that you would even ask that question of "Is it a relapse" so please read this: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/seven-days-now-what.183685/#post-1566190

Of course its not a relapse, that's not even a question, but it might be slowing down the recovery. If all you're doing is writing then its no big deal but make sure you're not lying to yourself and really just doing it because it turns you on or even worse, fantasizing about it. But if its really just honest writing then don't worry.

Anyway, stay strong man! Push through those shitty feelings and know there's light on the other side. Try practicing meditation if you don't already, it helps a lot with this kind of thing. Good luck man!
Click to expand...

damnnnnnnn.... thank you so much for the answer!!!

about the writing things, yeah its just honest writings, because my mind... well... tend to be sexual and sensual so yeah ill just write down those things aestethically... thank you very much friend for the advice!
 
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