The start of my journey...

P

Philip_ZA

Fapstronaut
Im writing this on the evening of my first 17 days. This is first time in probably 6 years ive made a conscious effort to abstain from any form of porn or masturbation. Dont think its even necessary to mention what a roller coaster the past few days have been. The first 2 weeks id say was the easy part for me, with the new year and everything busy between work and study, so i could easily forget about everything and just live. But then things got real and i realized with a shock that this would probably be one of the most difficult things i could do. Suddenly it was as if my head, heart and flesh were all pulling is different directions witch led to loads of mixed feelings.

I wont sugarcoat it... this is hard! Actively working to change something that's become a second nature and normal feels impossible. Everything in me is screaming to relapse even though i know how damaging it is... i discovered this damage during the past 17 days.

Through all the difficulties and struggles i do have hope! From what ive experienced in this short time i know that this will be life changing. Ive started to feel alive again even if its just the confidence gained through the silent victory of another day without falling into the old habit. Ive started focusing on other aspects of my life like prayer, bible study, health and relationships and in all of these i feel like im finally started to give them the attention they deserve.

Im glad for the hardships and the struggles for it only shows how big problem this is in my life but then again... i have hope and if i can do the first 17 days the next will also be possible!

Philip, 28, RSA
 
Welcome to NoFap where you are amongst friends who are here to encourage you and not judge you.

CONGRATULATIONS ON DAY 17!!!!

I would suggest joining the group Christian Fapstronauts who will encourage you through prayer and scripture.

What are your current strategies for combating the enemy called PMO?
 
D . J . said:
Welcome to NoFap where you are amongst friends who are here to encourage you and not judge you.

CONGRATULATIONS ON DAY 17!!!!

I would suggest joining the group Christian Fapstronauts who will encourage you through prayer and scripture.

What are your current strategies for combating the enemy called PMO?
Click to expand...

Thank you very much! Ive already joined the Christian group.

At the moment im taking it one day at a time. I think its important to not approach this whole challenge in its entirety but to break it down to small battles and victories. In the past few days ive also started to catch up on projects ive been neglecting so it helps to keep my mind busy. This forum is also a great help, just reading the testimonies and experiencing the fellowship helps a lot.

Its great to finally know that there are others with the same struggles who i can call on at any time
 
Philip_ZA said:
Im writing this on the evening of my first 17 days. This is first time in probably 6 years ive made a conscious effort to abstain from any form of porn or masturbation. Dont think its even necessary to mention what a roller coaster the past few days have been. The first 2 weeks id say was the easy part for me, with the new year and everything busy between work and study, so i could easily forget about everything and just live. But then things got real and i realized with a shock that this would probably be one of the most difficult things i could do. Suddenly it was as if my head, heart and flesh were all pulling is different directions witch led to loads of mixed feelings.

I wont sugarcoat it... this is hard! Actively working to change something that's become a second nature and normal feels impossible. Everything in me is screaming to relapse even though i know how damaging it is... i discovered this damage during the past 17 days.

Through all the difficulties and struggles i do have hope! From what ive experienced in this short time i know that this will be life changing. Ive started to feel alive again even if its just the confidence gained through the silent victory of another day without falling into the old habit. Ive started focusing on other aspects of my life like prayer, bible study, health and relationships and in all of these i feel like im finally started to give them the attention they deserve.

Im glad for the hardships and the struggles for it only shows how big problem this is in my life but then again... i have hope and if i can do the first 17 days the next will also be possible!

Philip, 28, RSA
Click to expand...

Congratulation on this amazing streak, its good to hear about your change and accomplishments and all other positive things you are focussing. Keep up the great work and keep us posted so that we can be enlightened.
 
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