The Switch is Constantly On (Extreme Arousal)

Discussion in 'Problematic Sexual Behavior' started by Deleted Account, Jan 30, 2019.

  1. Something that I've always struggled with and still continue to struggle with is being overly aroused at all times. I've spoken about this to very close friends before and they've always said, "Holy hell, do I wish I was you! That sounds amazing!"

    Well they really don't get it. I can't sit at my desk, even at work, for a mere 5 - 10 minutes without having to stimulate myself in some way when nobody is looking. It could be as simple as squeezing my pelvic floor muscles a couple times to feel the pleasurable sensations, or as much as feeling my nipples or rubbing myself.

    With this in mind, I can't even look at other women without immediately imagining them in some of the most despicable acts that my mind could conjure in that moment. Sometimes I can't even go to sleep at night without first having to stimulate myself a little bit.

    I've been this way roughly from age 14 (and i'm currently 23). I used to blame growing up / hormones, but it turns out that it was far more than that.

    I just needed to vent this and hear from anyone else that may have similar issues. It's one of the toughest roadblocks on my NoFap journey. What do the rest of you do to help in these situations?
     
  2. ultrafabber

    ultrafabber Fapstronaut

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    Yes. I used to have this. In my opinion many nofappers actually have some degree and form of persistent genital arousal disorder (but NOT priapism).

    I made topics about this too. This constant AND instant arousal is completely abnormal. It's abnormal to pop a boner just because you saw an ad with some cleavage. I used to have this as well, to the point where i'd get tingly in my pc muscles and a semi just by remembering a woman or a woman talking to me. I used to get wet dreams all the time. I used to literally be unable to NOT masturbate once I saw an arousing pic. I used to masturbate in my sleep involuntarily.

    Thank God i got past it but it was very difficult. Once you accept that masturbation and sex fantasizing are abnormal and you should not do them ever again, it gets easy. But at the point you're at it's going to be hard to let go and I assume you will get a lot of unpleasant withdrawal symptoms (insomnia, agitation, mood swings etc).
     
  3. ImpureHuman

    ImpureHuman Fapstronaut

    Your way of thinking has created habit. you have to undo the way of thinking which will eliminate the habit itself.a
    Target the root of the problem. The situations leading to habit.
     
    4DCreator likes this.
  4. I would change the habit now. Goto any lengths to do this, even if it means getting rid of social media, changing career, spending more time outside, changing friends, whatever it takes, everyone has their own things they need to change, the only one that really binds all of us is to stay away from P. If you don’t change now, your body will eventually make you change (or at least stop all dopamine hits, making you face the pain underneath) by going into flatline, this can be a very unpeasant experience, and can last anywhere from weeks to years. You know that feeling after you’ve fapped and you feel dread, guilt, paranoia and shame, it’s like that but constant
     
  5. Sun.bear

    Sun.bear New Fapstronaut

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    The first step is asking for help and you’ve accomplished that so well done! I know that it must be alienating being female and having a problem that is usually associated with men (and even then still deeply taboo to admit to). What your brain craves is natural dopamine to replace the dopamine produced by PMO. I know it’s boring and cliched, but excercise and eating a healthy diet can really help. Good luck sister
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  6. @Mag Phan yes I have the same thing. Maybe with some time on nofap it will get better. I am 50 ish and I get boners all day long. I can’t sit still either without my hands finding their way Dow to at least gently caress my junk. Let do our best to overcome this.
     
  7. Thank you for the encouragement and eye opening words everyone. I 100% accept my realities with these problems and i'm finally prioritizing rebooting :)

    I appreciate the encouragement, though I am male! :) I have started a new exercise regime to help with these urges and it seems to help the more I stick to it.
     
  8. Pinetree

    Pinetree Fapstronaut

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    This isn't what you describe below. What you describe is that you on purpose stimulate yourself very often, and that makes you aroused (obviously).

    You need to reduce the frequency of your self-stimulation. And find/avoid triggers to the best of your ability. And of course, avoid porn.
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  9. ultrafabber

    ultrafabber Fapstronaut

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    It's a little bit of both. You have the urge to self-stimulate because you are aroused and you are aroused because you self-stimulated. When you're extremely addicted you don't self stimulate to get aroused, you're aroused almost all the time and/or the switch from not_aroused to aroused gets flipped very easy.
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  10. Yup.......pretty much the fastest route to make your brain think it’s making too much dopamine, thus the brain de-letting/switching off the dopamine receptors.......flatline.......
     
  11. Ultrafabber responded well to this. Even when I managed a streak of 5 - 7 days in the past, or even days when I wouldn't stimulate myself, the extreme arousal was still present. I could be thinking about budgeting / financing and be very focused on the subject, yet still carry extreme arousal without stimulation and no real triggers. I've found myself deep in focus on a project, yet still had one hand doing something without fully realizing it. It's become almost subconscious habit over the years. I think I need to reach at least a month or two of no PMO to reduce this.


    Exactly. Even when there aren't any triggers or urges it still happens, and it's quite draining.
     
    ultrafabber likes this.
  12. ultrafabber

    ultrafabber Fapstronaut

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    Pretty much, i even used to masturbate when I slept. My ex was extremely disturbed by that and for good reason.

    I was also touching my dick randomly while watching youtube or reading something. It wasn't even erect or anything, but i petted it unconsciously.
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  13. Exactly! It's just upsetting when all you want is to feel more in the moment than dealing with confusing arousals not even triggered by anything.
     
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